Korean Job Discussion Forums

[hack]

Since my daughter has started dating in Canada and I'm over here unable to meet her dates, I have instituted the following application for her prospective dates to fill out and return to me before they can date her. It is probably the only thing my ex wife and I have ever agreed on.

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER:

Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.



1. NAME _______________________________ DATE OF BIRTH ________________

2. HEIGHT ____________________ WEIGHT __________ I.Q _____

MEDICAL SCHOOLS APPLIED TO:_______________________________________________________
SCHOLARSHIPS ELIGIBLE FOR_________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________
(continue on back if necessary)

3. SOCIAL INSURANCE # _____________ DRIVERS LICENSE # __________________

4. BOY SCOUT RANK____________________________________________________

5. HOME ADDRESS _________________ CITY/PROV ___________ Postal Code _________

6. Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent?___________________________

If No., EXPLAIN ___________________________________________________

7. Number of years your parents have been married ____________________________

8. Do you own a van? ______ A truck with oversized tires? ______ A waterbed? _______

Do you have an earring, nose ring, or belly button ring? A tattoo______________________

(If "yes" to any of #8, discontinue application and leave premises )

9. In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?______________________________

__________________________________________________________________________

10. In 50 words or lest, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?

_________________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________

11. In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

_________________________________________________________________________



12. Church/synagogue/temple you attend _____________ How often do you attend __________________



13. When would be the best time to interview your father, mother and priest/rabbi/minister? ____



14. Answer by filling in the blank: please answer freely. ALL answers are confidential

(That means I won't tell anyone-ever-I promise.)



a) If I were shot the last place on my body I would want wounded is __________________

b) If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my ________________

c) A woman's place is in the ________________________________________

d) The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is _____________

e) When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is her ______________

( NOTE: If your answer begins with "T" or "A", discontinue. Leave premises

keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.)

15. A list of all your email addresses, chat room id's, ip addresses, mobile phone numbers, pager #'s, and associated passwords must be provided along with a DNA sample.



I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF ANYTHING THAT ANNE's FATHER, BROTHER, UNCLES, GRANDFATHERS AND 2 ROTTWEILERS WISH TO DO TO ME.



________________________________________ Signature


Please allow four to six months for processing. You will be notified in writing in the highly unlikely event you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. If you try to expedite this application by any means, you will be contacted by two gentlemen wearing white ties. black fedoras and suits named Guido and Sal.

Best wishes and thank you for your interest in 1 of the 2 most important things in my life.(the other being Anne's brother who just qualified for the Canadian Olympic boxing team in the super heavyweight division)

[skconqueror]

Your sanity? Get a grip with reality. Someone is gonna be banging your daughter. Boom boom boom, I want you in my room.. etc.

[livinginkorea]

Haha I like the T and A bit. Funny stuff.

[tzechuk]

LOL. Funny.

[Ya-ta Boy]

I've seen Anne. Dad needn't worry. Unless the date is blind drunk, she is safe.

[just because]

I sure hope you are joking..

Your daughter keeps tellin gme she doesn't want to introduce me to her father...i can see why now

[peemil]

1. NAME: Peemil. DATE OF BIRTH: Is the first date in a maternity ward?

2. HEIGHT: Seven hands. WEIGHT: I know I have to "weight."
I.Q: I like crumpets.

MEDICAL SCHOOLS APPLIED TO: The Dr Kevorkian School of Correspondence Medicine.

SCHOLARSHIPS ELIGIBLE FOR: Robbing the 7-11. Stealing old ladies purses'. Robbing the Great National Bank.

3. SOCIAL INSURANCE # My 9mm. DRIVERS LICENSE #: I can drive- I just never got the ticket.

4. BOY SCOUT RANK: Chief arsonist.

5. HOME ADDRESS: Home is usually where I get dressed. CITY/PROV: Downtown Winnipeg. Postal Code: Usually people just scream, "He's gone postal!"

6. Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent? Neither.
If No., EXPLAIN: I was raised by donkeys.

7. Number of years your parents have been married: Donkeys aren't allowed to get married.

8. Do you own a van? Only when I rob the milk truck.
A truck with oversized tires? No. That'd be cool though. Do you?
A waterbed? Only when I have to much to drink and have an accident.

Do you have an earring, nose ring, or belly button ring? A tattoo: Foreskin ring. Tattoo on my tadger.

(If "yes" to any of #8, discontinue application and leave premises )

9. In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?

That she better jump from the roof, or have a hot bath and a bottle of gin.

10. In 50 words or lest, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?

I'm going to pop a clip into Daddy's arse.

11. In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

Mummy is going to get pistol whipped.

12. Church/synagogue/temple you attend: Church of the Holy Vinegar Stroke. How often do you attend: Everynight before sleep. Sometimes in the morning.

13. When would be the best time to interview your father, mother and priest/rabbi/minister? They're cool. You don't have to worry about them.


14. Answer by filling in the blank: please answer freely. ALL answers are confidential

(That means I won't tell anyone-ever-I promise.)

a) If I were shot the last place on my body I would want wounded is: Head.

b) If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my: Back.

c) A woman's place is in the: Missionary position.

d) The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is: Where I stashed the body.

e) When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice about her is her: Rootability.

( NOTE: If your answer begins with "T" or "A", discontinue. Leave premises

keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.)

15. A list of all your email addresses, chat room id's, ip addresses, mobile phone numbers, pager #'s, and associated passwords must be provided along with a DNA sample: Nope.

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF ANYTHING THAT ANNE's FATHER, BROTHER, UNCLES, GRANDFATHERS AND 2 ROTTWEILERS WISH TO DO TO ME.

Peemil. Signature


Please allow four to six months for processing. You will be notified in writing in the highly unlikely event you are approved. Please do not try to call or write. If you try to expedite this application by any means, you will be contacted by two gentlemen wearing white ties. black fedoras and suits named Guido and Sal.

Best wishes and thank you for your interest in 1 of the 2 most important things in my life.(the other being Anne's brother who just qualified for the Canadian Olympic boxing team in the super heavyweight division)
_________________
Heaven-The police are British, cooks are Italian, lovers are French, mechanics are German And it's all organized by the Swiss
Hell-The cooks are British, mechanics are French, lovers are Swiss, police are German And it's all organized by Italians

[EFLtrainer]

I'm just wondering why the suits have names.

[Freezer Burn]

6. Do you have one MALE and one FEMALE parent?___________________________

If No., EXPLAIN ___________________________________________________


You should go for the same sex parents dude, chances are he's going to be gay and not want to put a seed in your daughters belly
He'll be in it for the trophy girl