Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Hater Depot]

This should be at least as good as freakiest waegooks.

One of my first year roommates was really into hosting prospective students and showing them the campus. That is, until this guy.

He seemed normal at first. Then he asked us "Do you have any PROTEIN?" Uh, well.. I had some soybeans so he munched a few and then announced it was time for his workout. He droppped down, did a grand total of ONE pushup, and pronounced himself exhausted. Later my roommate swears he w@nked in his sleeping bag.

We forgot about him until the next year when he showed up as a student. He claimed to have no memory of us and went about earning the title of looniest *beep* on campus. He would start saying bizarre things and ask weird questions, and it was as if he knew how weird he was being but couldn't stop himself. When it rained he would carry his things around in a plastic garbage can, and he started carrying around a notebook in which he would scribble furiously. He joined the judo class my friend was teaching and I got to be his partner. He showed up wearing his singlet from high school and, very obviously, NOTHING ELSE AT ALL. He would keep asking "hey, can you do this in judo?" and then throw some WWF move on me.

(A year later my reward for distracting him from her was to be the 'judo dummy' in the class my friend taught for her sorority. Being a good guy does have its moments.)

He was actually a pretty strong guy and started working out a lot. Everybody at the gym hated him because a) he didn't shower enough and b) he grunted and groaned like a bastard. He also asked if the school provided personal trainers for students.

[joe_doufu]

All the freaky people I knew in college (and there were several) turned out to become my oldest and closest friends. So I won't tell you any stories. Long live the "freaks and geeks"!

[mindmetoo]

Mine would be a guy named Bernie. I met Bernie working at my university student newspaper. Bernie was a man in his 30s, had a couple advanced degrees under his belt, but little or no aspirations (or patience) to work a real-life job. Bernie eked out a marginal living renting out his fixer-upper house, taking low paying jobs in student media (like student newspaper, the radio station...), and buying junk, reconditioning it, and selling it. He'd sell the stuff to friends, co-workers, people he met at a bar... really anyone with not a lot of money, a need for a durable good, and some level of impaired judgment. The term "A Bernie Special" was coined to imply a product that cost little but never worked or when it did work, the so-called labor saving device required considerable time/energy to make it work right.

Bernie Specials always had some peculiarity. For example, he would sell you a computer for $200 but note you had to keep the power supply on top of a bag of ice because it heated up too much (he would, of course, offer you a deal on an ice maker he found behind an abandoned motel and reconditioned). He'd sell you an air conditioner for $75 and while setting it up for you (Bernie was always glad to come around the dinner hour to help set something up) he would note the unit's fan emitted a foul smell. He'd advise that when you ran the air conditioner you place a running fan facing the unit to blow back the toxic gasses. He assured you that, despite the fact the cold air was all being blown back into the air conditioner, this arrangement would still keep your apartment cool. It was creating a thermal vortex or some Larry Nivenesque phenomenon that would suck up all the heat tachyons.

Bernie was one of those mad genius types and the spitting image of Matt Frewer's Max Headroom. He really did live twenty minutes into the future. This was particularly noticeable when he engaged you in conversation. Bernie started conversations as if he was already half way into them. One moment he would be quietly sitting next to you, eyeing your pitcher of beer, and the next moment he would pipe up with something like "Then the car door opened and some boxes spilled out. Seeing as how no one was coming back to collect the boxes I grabbed them myself. Turns out they were full of frozen chickens. If you're interested in buying some��"

Bernie was a chain smoker. The problem was Bernie always seemed short of cash. Chain smoking doesn't come cheap, especially in Canada. Bernie decided to quit. I credit Bernie with inventing the method of quitting smoking by not actually quitting smoking. You simply quit buying cigarettes. Since you have a wide circle of friends, associates, coworkers, customers, and tenants who all smoke, it's quite easy to hit one of them up for a butt. You can work your way through your roster of friends/associates for several months before people catch on that every time you see Bernie, he always seems to have been caught short for smokes, and wouldn't you spot him a ciggie?

Bernie's other addiction was beer -- yet another expensive pursuit in the heavily taxed realm of Canada. Bernie realized he could brew and bottle his own beer at home for a fraction of the cost. Unfortunately, Bernie's first batch did not turn out very well. I think there's some kind of aging/malting process involved that he sort of skipped over. What most people would recognize as an unrecoverable disaster, Bernie saw as an opportunity. He could simply bring a six pack of his skunky concoction to parties and trade it for real beer. All he had to do was convince slightly inebriated party go'ers of the purity and quality inherent in his homebrewed beer.

Even Bernie had to admit defeat in another cost-cutting measure. While food can't rightly be called an addiction or an unnecessary expense, it still costs money. One can always trim some fat. Bernie devoted his mad skillz0rs to cutting back drastically on his food budget. After some research he found that the Reagan administration, in its quest to devise a strategy for winning a nuclear war, had determined the surviving American population could be adequately fed with a thick gruel that provided subsistence levels of calories and vitamins. This survival food could be made for pennies a pound, versus the extortion-level prices butchers were charging for baloney. Bernie got a hold of this recipe and made up a huge batch. His idea was to freeze it into meal-sized cubes and then eat that for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Now, the problem with gruel is, unlike say pizza, you don't even want to eat gruel once, let alone three times a day for however long it takes to pay off your mortgage. And unlike his home-brewed beer plan, you can't trade frozen gruel to anyone for anything, no matter how drunk they are.

[Leslie Cheswyck]

[jacl]

I was never "in" college/university because I went in my hometown. I was a townie.

[Bulsajo]

The freakiest guy I knew in college wasn't really that freaky, he was just so multicultural it sort of takes your breath away when you first meet him.

He holds a French passport, speaks English with a French accent, and French with a Parisian accent. Nothing too surprising there. But he is also extremely large and wide and of Japanese heritage. And he is Jewish.

So imagine being introduced to a French speaking, yarmulka wearing Sumo Wrestler. That's Jean Francois.

[poker player]

that would be my buddy young Billy. IQ north of 150, BEng in 2 years, MEng in a few months and Phd in some weird engineering phenomena that you have to be at least 65 and look like Einstein to understand.

Drove a 68 Mustang 428 that managed to move a city bus 40 feet from a dead stop when he rear ended after an all day drinking session at the local Uni watering hole. When the cop asked him for his License, gave him a Canadian Tire credit card. When the cop gave him shit for that, he insisted that it was paid up and should be accepted. When he lost his license, hired a hooker from his scholarship funds to chauffeur him around. Used to drink a case of Labatt's 50 a day and would sing the engineering song full tilt just before some phys ed major dropped him when billy declared that anyone majoring in anything but engineering was batting for the other team.

I ran into at a home coming football game 3 years ago. Wife, 3 kids and a full on tenure at a major Canadian University with about 300 published papers to his name. The first words out of his mouth? You got a beer? These assholes won't allow beer into the games anymore.

[OiGirl]

[khyber]

i suppose this guy isn't that crazy but..
there was a guy in our school "abe".
when he was 'younger' (an, as yet undetermined age), he was attending a troubled boys school. And no wonder, in his first year there, he stabbed a kid right through the hand with a pencil.

Not usually a "get to know you story".
Also found out that his parents were split in junior high (nothing weird there) and his very hands off mother let him choose what name he wanted. So instead, of taking his mother's or fathers name, he went to the office and changed his name to "Abraham Buckingham".

he was this 5'11 115lb guy. He played on our soccer team...ahhh...crazy abe. you watch him play soccer and you'd be reminded of a 12 year old prepubescent on stilts...GREAT fun! And crazy with teh challenges...

and whenever you ordered chicken, he wouldn't touch the meat but would collect all the chicken bones and devour them asking "you're not gonna eat those?"

[crazylemongirl]

1. The guy who during a drinking party gets up in a crowd of people, uses his member as a wrist watch and then urinates over the crowd of stunned onlookers.

2. The guy who was ripping off various welfare schemes while living in the university gym roof and selling drugs on the side. He was always on the run from other drug dealers. He used to be kind of smart but years and year of drug use had take it's toll. Always had someone after him.

3. The guy who had some sort of weird disease with his eyes so he had to wear dark sun glasses everywhere. He used to stand in the corner of the common room like a bouncer, every day for weeks and weeks on end. Not talking to anyone, just staring. One day he finally snapped and beat the crap out of some guy.

4. Not from my uni but I knew him. Spent 20 years honning in on a BA in sociology while organizing various protests. He had long hair and used to wear a kilt.

[Free World]

He turned into a hermit for 2 weeks in first year when he was trying to quit drinking. During this time he didn't leave his dorm room. He hot boxed his room constantly and survived on protein bars and cranberry juice. All of his human waste was discarded out of his 5th floor window into the courtyard below.
When he came out of this hibernation he went on a 3 day bender... no sleep, just drinking at parties and bars. The finale of this was when he got in a fight with a bouncer at a bar... broke the guy's jaw and then tried to fight the 3 cops that came to take him away. When he got out of the drunk tank the next day he gave our residence assistant a half quarter of pot to tell the cops that he was not home when they came to officially charge him.

[Moldy Rutabaga]

[OiGirl]

[liam0420]

This one guy, about 24 when I met him. Lived in the frat house. Glass as thick as hell, pretty stocky, think he was Lebanese or something. Anyway, just brilliant, heh. Graduated with a Bachelor of Finance 96 percent average--highest ever in the field at UBC. As an undergrad, he actually edited the course textbooks. Went on to finish a two year MBA program in one. Applied and got accepted to Oxford Law School, but opted for a hand in the cigarette smuggling business. For all I know, the sad f??k is probably still seated on the Frat couch surround by 18 year olds, buying dented cans of soup. Weird cat.

This other dude. Another guy from the Frat, though he was gone a year before I arrived. Big IQ, model, really popular with guys and girls. Nicest guy by all accounts. One day cops turn up with a search warrant. Open his room. Veritable shop of horrors, eh: the full range of sex toys, *beep* pumps leather, harnesses the whole bit. They also found a loaded hand gun and a ladies index finger.

Later it was discovered that unbeknownst to us, this guy was a stripper, bixsexual and recreational drug user. He was also a murderer, having strangled then dumped the body of a waitress from teh Number Five into a smithrite before setting it alight. He now resides in prison back East.

[VanIslander]

He had one eyed deformed since birth, quite contorted and the eye lid misshaped, making him look creepy.

But I didn't care about that.

He called me his "best friend" one day even though I only ever saw him and talked for ten minutes before, and in, the one and only course (economics 3000-level - Money and Banking) he and I had ever taken together.

He was planning to get into the mortuary business eventually with a distant cousin down in Texas.

I am NOT kidding!

He ranks right up there with a college guy who swore that girls were at their peak at age ten and that by thirteen they are.... well, I won't use his sick and depraved language, but suffice it to say, he surely is a lifelong pedophile though he never admitted as much (for the microsecond of extra time I ever gave him in the three classes he happened to be in at the same time and place as me).

Which guy was creepier? The second one, though he didn't look it.