Korean Job Discussion Forums

Real Reality · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul

Am I Not Korean Too?

I grew up in Japan and went to school there. Like some 600,000 other ethnic Koreans living in Japan, I am Korean-Japanese.

I have been in Korea for five years now and I can only say that I am filled with bitterness and disappointment. Yes, I learned the Korean language. I made many Korean friends. But, contrary to my foolish expectations, there was no home for me in Korean society and culture. It was a great shock and a bitter disappointment to discover that many Koreans did not consider me to be Korean. In the end, I gave up defending my Korean identity with my Korean friends.

We come to Korea thinking we are coming home to a great welcome, only to be met with indifference. Confused, we ask where we belong. Have we truly lost our Korean identity? Are we now Japanese? Where can we claim home? Heartbroken, we stand on Korean soil, and we ask our motherland one more time: Am I not Korean too?

http://times.hankooki.com/lpage/opinion/200306/kt2003063017114611390.htm

Tiger Beer · Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Pretty interesting stuff.. I think thats quite common with alot of people.. you really become more and more of whatever country you spend your time in..

Oddly, I'm American.. but the more time I spend in Korea.. the more stranger it is when I go home as well.. and imagine if I had kids here, and my offspring went back to the USA.. it would be totally unlike whatever they would think it to be..

Anyhow, interesting stuff..

Medic · Joined: 11 Mar 2003

Read the same article in the Korea Times. Very interesting. I would have thought that all Koeans would embrace someone of their own no matter where they had lived or what their previous life had been like. Didn't seem to apply here. It's all the more incredible, because the individual in the article actually went out of his way to say that he was a Korean by virtue of whom his ancestors were, and that he considerd Korea his home. He spelled it out in not so many words, and didn't look down his nose at the people he was saying it too.

Didn't seem to have any Jung. Very strange indeed, because I thought all Koreans had this. I gather from this that the people have jung with ohers only when it suits them.

Tiger Beer · Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Yaya · Joined: 25 Feb 2003 Location: Seoul

I can understand where she's coming from, but I went through the same thing and later on, I understood that a lot of it was my fault. Many times, we fail to blame OURSELVES and instead lay it on something or someone else.

True, many Koreans didn't accept me because I'm a K-A but I met many others who did. Furthermore, I would've stayed in Korea had my job situation been better (and I'm planning a return in the future).

In my experience, by the way, a lot of ethnic Koreans from Japan can't stop complaining about Korea and saying how much better it is in Japan, that Japanese women are better looking (yeah, right!) and so on. Moreover, they hang mostly with either Japanese or other K-Js.

Oh, boo hoo.

Hank Scorpio · Joined: 18 Jan 2003 Location: Ann Arbor, MI

mokpochica · Joined: 21 Jan 2003 Location: Ann Arbor, MI

I think that this kind of experience is common, but it depends on the kind of people you end up interacting with. I've heard a lot about North Koreans who have escaped to S. Korea only to find that they are discriminted against in terms of finding decent work. The ethnic Koreans that come from China have the same problem, and end up working in 3-D jobs. Even though many of these people have grown up speaking the Korean language (unlike the writer of this article) they are not accepted as Korean.

On the other hand, I have had friends who were adopted from Korea to the U.S. and when they come back to Korea they are told that they are Korean and part of the family, even though they can't speak Korean. I know a person who had a relationship with a Korean guy and when she was planning on leaving he told her that she was not American, she was Korean and asked why she would voluntarily leave her homeland again. Of course, being told you're Korean when you really feel American can bring its own problems ...And then there are the other people that look on adoptees with pity and some that try to get money from the 'rich American' when they come back and re-connect with their birth family. So it's one of those things where it probably varies from case to case.

Tiger Beer · Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Yaya · Joined: 25 Feb 2003 Location: Seoul

That is just ONE example of how an adoptee handled the situation. If you look at the user reviews at imdb.com, many blasted the adoptee for not helping out her birth family more.

It's just me, but if I was adopted and I found out that my parents gave me up because they were dirt poor, I would try to help out. I saw that documentary and man, I was rather disappointed with the adoptee's coldness, not to mention her typical redneck behavior.

I have a friend who is a Korean adoptee from France. He was raised by an upper-class French family and is set to inherit over half a million US bucks. Yet he chose to quit his $7,000 a month job to go to Korea. He found his birth mother and found out that she was so dirt poor, she had to give him and his brother up for adoption. He understood, and now, he's helping to take care of her. He also never wants to live in France again (hear hear!).

Dan · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Sunny Glendale, CA

well, if you're only making 7k a year, whats to stop you, the great benefits?

If that were me, I'd send money every now and then, but then, i don't know what its like to be adopted.

mokpochica · Joined: 21 Jan 2003 Location: Ann Arbor, MI

I'm sure it depends on the adoptee's situation. I know of someone who was adopted at the age of 9 and remembers physical abuse from his birth family. When he came back his family told him that they only sent him to be adopted so he could 'get a good education abroad' and wanted him to live in Korea and take care of the family, monetarily and otherwise (he was the only son). It was a very uncomfortable situation for him obviously and he eventually decided to leave and not have contact with them.

Yaya · Joined: 25 Feb 2003 Location: Seoul

I admit that some adoptees do remember a bit about their Korean families. One adoptee told me his brother was abandoned by his mother in a market, and that his brother still remembers that and thus has no interest in Korea.

On the other hand, another adoptee said she understands why she was given up considering the tough life she would've led in Korea (her father was thrown in jail and her mother's family didn't want an illegit kid). Still, she went to Korea and made peace with her birth parents.