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LL Moonmanhead
Joined: 21 Mar 2005 Location: yo momma
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 3:29 am Post subject: Serious commitment issues |
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Once i hit the six month point in my relationships i start to get really itchy feet. My eye is starting to rove and i'm making excuses not to meet my girlfriend. i seriously think I will never have a 'long term' relationship. |
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VanIslander

Joined: 18 Aug 2003 Location: Geoje, Hadong, Tongyeong,... now in a small coastal island town outside Gyeongsangnamdo!
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 3:43 am Post subject: |
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Hold on, one time. Get past it, get your second wind and make it past a year, it gets better,.... in some cases.
On this specific issue I have relevant experiences.
I've had two longterm relationship (4 yrs, 5 yrs) and in each case the second year was the best in so many ways! I was also in a couple of mid-length relationships (2 yrs, 1 yr.) that should have ended by the six-month mark. What is the difference between those that get better and better, and those that get worse and worse? Can't say, sorry. A few things come to mind, but no reliable indicators. Just appreciating getting to know them more, liking what you get to know, doing different things, growing as they say together, each putting out an effort, feeling at the end of each day the eagerness to TALK, to simply be with that person, needing that. It can be scary. If you are scared, that's a good sign. From my experience of the two long relationships that got better. If you are bored or frustrated or annoyed or restless, then that's a bad sign, closer to like the mid-length relationships of mine that only got worse.
Good luck whatever. |
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Qinella
Joined: 25 Feb 2005 Location: the crib
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:15 am Post subject: |
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Never dated anyone longer than 3 months. Getting close to that mark now with this one.. who knows.. |
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-X-
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:46 am Post subject: Re: Serious commitment issues |
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LL Moonmanhead wrote: |
Once i hit the six month point in my relationships i start to get really itchy feet. My eye is starting to rove and i'm making excuses not to meet my girlfriend. i seriously think I will never have a 'long term' relationship. |
i used to be similar. i never had a relationship that made it past 6-8 months...until i met the right girl. my last relationship lasted over 5 years, but unfortunately Korea murdered it, and she's going back to Canada in a couple more weeks.
ironically, the longest relationships ive had have been with the kind of women that i wouldnt normally pursue. maybe thats the reason why one doesnt end up getting bored after 6 months; date different people than what youre used to and perhaps it will keep you interested. it worked for me. |
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Yo!Chingo

Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Location: Seoul Korea
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:57 am Post subject: |
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I used to be kinda the same way. I would date 1 guy after the other for about 3 months and then I would get "bored" or now that I think about it, maybe I was scared of being hurt. I would break up with them. I kept doing that until I finally met a guy who didn't bore me to death plus he wouldn't let me push him away. I think pushing someone away is a defensive mechanism for some. Man did I try to push him away though! I'm glad that he hung on...we've been married for 2 years now.
Maybe, you'll find the right person someday. If not, does it really matter? Good friends for some people are better than a spouse or constant lover. |
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djsmnc

Joined: 20 Jan 2003 Location: Dave's ESL Cafe
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Posted: Fri Oct 06, 2006 5:05 am Post subject: |
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I recently hit the 2 year mark. That's the longest yet! I think she's the one with itchy feet now |
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