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jewelz
Joined: 25 Sep 2006
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 Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:42 pm Post subject: How the heck can your boss tell you not to date |
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Hi, B/c I am in this small little village that is like a sub city of GUmi I have to 'keep up appearances' for the school. My boss does not want the town talking about me as a foreigner dating others like a korean or anyone else. "You should go to Gumi for that", I was just thinking in my head whatever, that was not in the contract... Only in KOREA would someone actually say that to you
I do not want to be alone forever... |
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Yu_Bum_suk
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:48 pm Post subject: |
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| He can't 'force' you to do anything outside work. It's entirely up to you. I can tell you, however, that if you're a small-town teacher and you and a K-girl have got a window seat at the most popular joint on high street and about 50 of your students walk by during the course of a meal, you'll feel like you're in a zoo display case and there will be some awkward questions the next school day. |
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jewelz
Joined: 25 Sep 2006
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 4:55 pm Post subject: gender clarification |
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I am a female instructor and my boss is in the same category.
She apparently lived in the U.S. for 20 years so why is she going all 'no human rights' korean on me |
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Yu_Bum_suk
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:01 pm Post subject: Re: gender clarification |
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| jewelz wrote: |
I am a female instructor and my boss is in the same category.
She apparently lived in the U.S. for 20 years so why is she going all 'no human rights' korean on me |
That's great. Are there any K-guys from your small town you actually want to date? Most western chicks don't really go for that type, if you're different, go for it. What's she really going to do? |
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inspector gadget
Joined: 11 Apr 2003
Location: jeollanam-do in the boonies
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:08 pm Post subject: |
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I live in the boonies also and you do get the questions the next day at school when you are seen with a korean mate. Mostly from the students, is that your girlfriend, are you going to get married, she is pretty, blah blah blah.
I have not been told not to date Koreans but if I had been I would ignore them 100%. That is purely an unacceptable request for them to ask of you.
I have no problems being seen in public with K-girls because its none of your employess business.
Do what you want with your personal life, your are not in jail and your boss is not the police. |
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Ya-ta Boy
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: Established in 1994
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:23 pm Post subject: |
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| It's quite right that you can ignore the boss and do what you want after work. Just don't come back on here in a few months and complain about not having any privacy when you date in a small town. |
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jewelz
Joined: 25 Sep 2006
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:30 pm Post subject: i guess you have never lived in a small town in canada |
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everyone is up in your 'business' in victoria bc... especially if you have a child.. you become some sort of public property
in addition, i find your tone abit rude, you could tone it down a bit |
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formerflautist
Joined: 30 May 2006
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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| It's up to you how you want to handle dating. You're going to have to get used to people staring at you if you choose to date a Korean man. But your boss has no say. And Ya-ta Boy wasn't being rude, he was just letting you know the reality of the situation. |
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Paji eh Wong
Joined: 03 Jun 2003
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:59 pm Post subject: |
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| "You should go to Gumi for that" |
That is relatively good advice in Korea. Koreans have very "different" ideas of privacy than we do. If you think people in the garden city get all up under you, you ain't seen nothing yet. |
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Khyron
Joined: 27 Jan 2005
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:09 pm Post subject: Re: How the heck can your boss tell you not to date |
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| jewelz wrote: |
Hi, B/c I am in this small little village that is like a sub city of GUmi I have to 'keep up appearances' for the school. My boss does not want the town talking about me as a foreigner dating others like a korean or anyone else. "You should go to Gumi for that", I was just thinking in my head whatever, that was not in the contract... Only in KOREA would someone actually say that to you
I do not want to be alone forever... |
Japan, too.
I *had* to guit a job in Japan because of that.
At my first job in Korea, I was told to selll my motorbike, not be seen on the streets at night, always dress well on days off, etc.
Racist and controlling twats... |
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Khyron
Joined: 27 Jan 2005
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:12 pm Post subject: Re: gender clarification |
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| jewelz wrote: |
She apparently lived in the U.S. for 20 years so why is she going all 'no human rights' korean on me |
She probably lived in a Korean social bubble, spoke Korean every day and ate kimchi every day.
It happens... even to foreigners living abroad in Korea.  |
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tiger fancini
Joined: 21 Mar 2006
Location: Testicles for Eyes
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:36 pm Post subject: |
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| A western girl who works in a hagwon in my town has been told she'll get sacked if her boss see's her smoking in public. Surely he can't legally do this? |
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Yu_Bum_suk
Joined: 25 Dec 2004
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 6:46 pm Post subject: |
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| tiger fancini wrote: |
| A western girl who works in a hagwon in my town has been told she'll get sacked if her boss see's her smoking in public. Surely he can't legally do this? |
I'm sure he can. And if she were a guy, she could probably just walk over to the window and light up in front of all the kids.
That reminds me, it's time for my ciggie break before I have to go teach 4th block. |
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crazylemongirl
Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 7:08 pm Post subject: |
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Newsflash! Korea is a different country. Don't expect to be able to do exactly what you want, it doesn't work that way. Because you are readily identifable, your actions outside of the hogwon WILL impact on your boss's business. In a public school, they don't want you setting a bad example. I know it sucks, but our standards of behavior are set differently over here.
You can still go out and have a good time, but just remember to not crap where you eat. |
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TheUrbanMyth
Joined: 28 Jan 2003
Location: Retired
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| Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2006 7:38 pm Post subject: |
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| crazylemongirl wrote: |
| . In a public school, they don't want you setting a bad example. . |
For whom? Other adult Koreans? Most students don't go to typical foreigner hangouts. |
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