Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Wrench]

Besides the normal Korean questions of: How long have you been in Korea, When are you leaving, Where are you from, Are you married?

I get constantly asked Do you have a girlfriend?

I fortunately don't have a girlfriend and nor do I wish to have one. The next thing out a Korean mouth is You must be lonely.

This is fucking driving me bonkers. Is it me or are Koreans exceptionally emotionally needy people?

I get the standard, I hate eating alone I need thats why I am married. You should get married have kids and you are not going to be lonely any more.

Holy fuggles isn't that a quick pile of crap to digest just so you don't eat alone.

When I try to explain that I don't get lonely because I am surrounded by kids and other teachers all day, the human contact is enough for me. I really appreciate my alone time in fact I prefer to be alone.

It just seems like all the men want to get married have their wives pop out couple brats and their life is no longer empty.

Am I broken as a human or are Korean overly needy for emotional/human contact all the time?

[laogaiguk]

[The Hierophant]

You're a cat among cattle. If you're a loner, then sheeple will never truly understand you, and, traditionally speaking, Korean culture is all about sheepledom. Be thankful that you'll never fit in here, it means you're free.

[Real Reality]

Marriage Costs Koreans an Arm and a Leg
Chosun Ilbo (February 23, 2006)
http://english.chosun.com/w21data/html/news/200602/200602230027.html

Most Divorced Men's Marriage Ruined by Family Days
Chosun Ilbo (August 4, 2006)
http://english.chosun.com/w21data/html/news/200608/200608040032.html

Korean Children Have Won Signs in their Eyes: Poll
by Park Won-su, Chosun Ilbo (February 2, 2005)
http://english.chosun.com/w21data/html/news/200502/200502010025.html

Kangaroo generation grows as graduates stay jobless
Job market tightens amid slumping economy, leaving many dependent on parents after graduation
Like little kangaroos, they "cannot leave their mothers' wombs." The French magazine l'Express coined the term "kangaroo generation" in 1998 for young unemployed in their 20s who either, economically or spiritually, depended on their parents, noting 80 percent relied on their parents to support and feed them.

Korea now has its own "kangaroo generation." The number of "kangaroos" is increasing as the prolonged economic slump continues and as many younger people, ignoring the downturn, reject jobs because pay and benefits are not up to their expectations and they can always fall back on parents in this family-oriented society.
By O Youn-hee, Korea Herald (September 3, 2004)
http://www.koreaherald.co.kr/SITE/data/html_dir/2004/09/03/200409030007.asp

Child abuse cases up 33%
By Lee Sun-young, The Korea Herald (May 12, 2005)
http://www.koreaherald.co.kr/SITE/data/html_dir/2005/05/12/200505120004.asp

Women taking lead in filing for divorce
JoongAng Daily July 01, 2005
http://joongangdaily.joins.com/200506/30/200506302309010009900090409041.html

Divorcing parents want to shed kids with spouse
A married couple, wearied by frequent bickering, recently agreed to divorce. But neither wanted to take their 6-year-old son. They ended up in a courtroom.... As the divorce rate rises, more couples are trying to avoid custody of their children.... Some couples even desert their children, ignoring court decisions....
by Jeon Jin-bae, JoongAng Ilbo (October 21, 2002)
http://joongangdaily.joins.com/200210/21/200210210030445169900090409041.html

Soaring suicides
Without a doubt we live in an extremely stressful society. But the many social conditions that drive us to mental strain or anguish can hardly explain the dismaying figure of 14,000 suicides a year, the highest among OECD countries.
Editorial, Korea Herald (October 31, 2006)
http://www.koreaherald.co.kr/SITE/data/html_dir/2006/10/31/200610310012.asp

Mental Illness, Stress Cases Rising
Donga.com (October 13, 2006)
http://english.donga.com/srv/service.php3?biid=2006101306378

[Benicio]

Koreans are hardly ever alone, so they are not used to it. That's why they think it's abnormal.
Pretty much all of their lives, there is someone at home, so they have few moments to be by themselves when someone isn't in their space, talking to them, bothering them, or sleeping next to them.
The kids sleep in the same bed/room with their parents well into adolescence.
For them to be alone is to deprive them of their normal existence.
They simply cannot comprehend that we would like to spend time alone. We need time away from people to recharge and relax our brains. This is a truly alien concept to them!
Two situations they never want to do alone: eat or go see a movie.
I've had students who say they have skipped meals in situations because they didn't want to eat alone. Not eating was better than eating solo!
When I have talked to them about my going to see a movie by myself, they looked at me like I have live lobsters coming out of my ears.

Just tell them- I know it gets tedious doing it over and over again- "While Koreans are accustomed to spending lots of time together and tend to feel lonely when not in the company of others, we foreigners are more comfortable with spending some time alone and even relish some quiet time without others".

Good luck and don't let the b@stards grind you down!

[Qinella]

Right, this reminds me of my sister's wedding. See, my brother had already gotten married, which leaves just me single. Almost every person at the wedding asked me when's my turn. When I told them I didn't care to ever get married, or at least no time soon, they looked at me like I was from Jupiter (and my grandfather told me I need someone to cook for me). All those Americans, astonished at my not wanting to get married. Must have been some kimchi in the water or something.

[doggyji]

[Satori]

[ella]

[jajdude]

Few people know the difference between introversion and extroversion?

I doubt that.
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Don't most Koreans stay home with mom and dad until marriage?

[ella]

Oh, yes, absolutely. I recommend that book to anyone who wants to understand more about it.

[Yo!Chingo]

Yeah, the whole alone time thing is completely lost on Koreans. I have a friend, korean, who doesn't for the life of her understand why I don't want to hang out with her instead of study or do my own activities by myself. I figure that there's too many people here so they're always with someone. They just have gotten so used to no privacy that it's a non issue.

[periwinkle]

[djsmnc]

[kimchi_pizza]

Wait....If you haven't gotten the question, "So, how you do? Home and and play yourself? Hahaha" Then you have somethin' to complain about. I just 'bout decked the dude. He saw the anger and quickly bought me a beer.

BUT, if I said I had a Korean Gf and she's H.O.T. then he probably woulda punched me!

It's a no-win situation here I guess...