Korean Job Discussion Forums

[denistron]

So my girlfriend broke up with me by text message about a month ago. We only dated about a month, and we were having disagreements. So when we broke up I thought it was for the best. She cited my leaving for Canada in 5 months the reason she wanted to break up with me. We talked, and although I was hurt I accepted that she was right, and left it at that.

Well, after about a week she changed her mind and wanted me back. After what I had just been through I really didn�t want to consider it at all. My problems are the way she tried to get me back. This is when my hell month began.

She started calling me over and over. 3 times a day, 5 times a day, 10 times a day... I stopped answering when I realized how obsessive about talking to me was getting. I told her to give me some space. She started sending mass amounts of text messages, 50 a day, 100 a day. I just had to start ignoring most of them.

She would come over to my house uninvited at night. One night when I came home she let herself in and wouldn't leave for almost 2 days. Talking did nothing. I couldn�t convince her that it wasn�t ok to be in my apartment without my permission. I had to get her out by convincing her to follow me outside and running back home and locking the door.

She still stood outside my door and knocked on the door all the next night, screaming, calling my two phone lines, and ringing to doorbell over and over until I had to disconnect everything. My doorbell and home phone are now unplugged. Her numbers have been blocked from my phone.

She randomly comes to my door at night and bangs on it. She usually comes around 4am. She screams and bangs for hours. This has happend about 5 times now. I know my neighbors must hate me by now. One time she was there from 4am-11am. She tries to pick the lock and force the door in by pushing it. If I open the door to leave or go out she tried to force her way in. She waits for me at my place after work. She would wait all day in front of my apartment in her car until I would get home. If I don't go inside she follows me around outside. She grabs my clothes and pulls on them.

So far all these things were annoying but harmless. I thought I could just ignore her until she calmed down, and finally we could talk about it. Now, it's 4 weeks later, and it's still going on. She sends me the most insane letters in the mail. They are full of confused emotions and broken English. She says she wants us to be friends ike we used to be. She sends me treats in her text messages about how I�m going to pay. She has also been telling people that I hit her, which is complete bullshit. She also tells me how she will get her "powerful family" to punish me for what I did. Here are a few text messages for example:

[Julius]

[kat2]

Good lord. She sounds certifiable. I think you made the right move by going to the police. I hope everything gets cleared up soon.

[denistron]

051-851-5801
051-851-5904

Both get you english service.

[CBP]

If she's getting worse after a month of her obsessive behavior, it's not going to get better any time soon. She probably has a history of this behavior. That's one thing to consider should you require an attorney. But meanwhile she could turn violent. Considering the threats, your wary neighbors, and the length of time this has been going on, I'd shack up with a friend, tell your employer what's happening (has she shown up at work?), and get a new apartment. Cancel your phones all together and get new numbers, new email. Don't leave a forwarding address anywhere.

I'm not in Korea, but her behavior isn't unique to Asia. I've been stalked, and it's no laughing matter. She has no control over her emotions right now. If a gun finds its way into her hands, she'll use it. Contact her family, ask your Korean friend to speak with them and tell them exactly what's happening. Express concern for her well-being and that she might be suicidal. Tell them you've gone to the police. Save everything she gives you or sends to you. Keep a log, get witnesses, etc.

Good luck.

[SeoulFinn]

Your story reminds me of one guy I know. He had almost the same kind of a experience after he broke up with his gf. Well, I think it was a mutual decision to end the relationship. Anyway, all of a sudden the lady in question wanted him back... and the rest is history.

Do you want to know what happened to them after all those hundreds of phone calls, messages and threats? They got married!

[denistron]

I do have her brother's numbr now that I think about it. She called me from it a few times to trick me because I blocked hers. I'll think about calling him.

[butlerian]

I wouldn't recommend calling her brother. That'd make it look like you are even turning her own family against her, and that'll only make her more alone and more determined to get revenge.

[matthews_world]

Move!

[kermo]

[RACETRAITOR]

This solution isn't for everyone, but I suggest attempting rodeo sex. There are many definitions, but specifically on this page look at 2 and 5.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rodeo+

[denistron]

I can't move. I paid key money for my place. I work in a public school. If I move I would have to get a new year lease and pay key money.

[CBP]

Good point someone made about contacting her family. It would isolate her even further. But I tend to feel concern for not just the victims but also the victimizers. At some point contact will have to be made with her family, most likely by the police.

You can't move, so disappear for a while. Change your phone numbers, your routines and habits, stay at a friend's or a motel for a month. Distance yourself from all possible contact with her.

[ajgeddes]

I don't know what moving would do in your case. Sounds to me like she follows you home from work. You would have to get a new job for the moving thing to work.

[babtangee]

Find another wacko Korean chick. A big, fat, old and ugly one (her being older than the previous one is most important). Pay her 100,000 won to play your new girlfriend. Have her beat up or scare away the old one. Problem solved.

Screw movin', all that crap. Kick her to the curb.