Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Lao Wai]

Hi,

I know this topic has probably been done a million times, but I want to get some opinions based what I'm going to say in this post.

I would say that when I lived in Korea, the number one thing that bothered me was people staring at me and talking about me. Now, I've heard numerous theories on this board to explain why Koreans do this as well as comments that foreigners in Korea over-exaggerate things and are just paranoid. I beg to differ on this last point. My Korean language ability was at a decent enough level that I could hear them talking about me and understand what they were saying. Also, I think you'd have to be an idiot not to see someone gawking at you on the subway.

I've heard some people on here say that some foreigners 'look for it', etc. Maybe, but I doubt it. I am currently living in Hong Kong. Nobody stares at me. Nobody yells "Hi.....eeee....." either. You could say that Hong Kong has a lot more foreigners, which it does, and that because it was a former British colony, it can't be compared to Korea. Okay, fair enough.

However, I also lived for a year in Mainland China. There were barely any foreigners where I lived. A lot less than Korea. I can count on one hand the amount of times I felt like people were staring at me. I heard the term for foreigner, 'Lao Wai', once the entire time I was there. Also, little school children would walk right on by me. Maybe.....you'd get a brief glance, but that was it.

So, I really don't think you can say what foreigners feel in Korea is just paranoia. I don't 'look for attention'. I just want to go about my business like everyone else. So, I really don't get it when I've read on this board that it's not so bad, and that the people who are bothered by it have some kind of paranoid self-image issue. I could walk around the streets in China (where I lived) and be thinking about other things. Yet, in Korea, I felt like that was hard to do because I just felt too 'out of place'.

Anyway, I should point out that I really had a lot of fun in Korea, love Korean food, enjoyed learning the language, etc. However, when I went back for a visit in July, I almost immediately got that 'sticking out like a sore thumb' feeling. I think it was even more exaggerated because I haven't felt like that in a long time.

I guess my final question would be to ask 'why are some people (like myself) so bothered by the staring and notice it everywhere. Yet other foreigners in Korea seem completely oblivious?'. I lived in Busan, by the way. I noticed Koreans were a bit more blase about foreigners in Seoul (but I still had numerous people in Seoul 'mimic' my conversation when walking near me) and yell out that I am 'handsome'.

[Junior]

Been here 4 years and I still can't figure out why Koreans are still so keen on staring at foreigners. never seen anything like it in other countries. I think it is a paranoia too.


Interesting you say China was relatively free of it. There seem to be conflicting reports from Chinese ESL teachers. " China is like Korea on steroids" etc.

[Qinella]

I would prefer staring to the typical annoyance I've been enduring lately, which is a surprised Korean who sees me reading a newspaper or something that's written in his language, disturbing my reading so he can exclaim with shock that he can't believe I can read Korean, and no other foreigner can do it, and Korean is such a difficult language, and blah blah blah.. I just wanna say, go sit over there and stare, please, because your condescension is killing me, jackass.

[RACETRAITOR]

Try shaving your head, growing ridiculous chops, and wearing a lot of pins with freaky looking images on them. Nobody ever looks at me.

[jajdude]

A lot of us foreigners try to understand this place and the behavior. I don't know if anyone can really figure it out, even after years. I think as long as foreigners as viewed as so different or as a sort of 'problem' this reaction to them will remain. By 'problem' I mean a source of discomfort, unfamiliarity, language barrier, even suspicion and distrust. All I know is that a strange psychology exists throughout the society regarding outsiders and those viewed as different.

I'm surprised you mentioned a lack of this in China. Mostly I have heard it is even more intense there, like you're really from another planet or something.

[spliff]

like them to stare. I love to do this...I position one of my hands somewhere around my upper body and make subtle pointing motions aimed at my crotch, my other hand I position near my weenis and display the snag sign, always good for a laugh and sometimes a pick up...

[Lao Wai]

Jajdude,

I lived in a city called Shenzhen, which borders Hong Kong. However, the two cities are like night and day. Anyway, most of the people in Shenzhen are from all over China (they go to Shenzhen for work). So, it's not like they've had much exposure to foreigners (like the Hong Kong Chinese). I also felt like they weren't all that interested in foreigners either. I was in Beijing for a week and didn't feel so foreign there either.

I'm wondering if this phenomenon is unique to Korea or if there are are countries where this occurs as well. I'm sure it happens elsewhere. BUT, whether these other countries are as developed as Korea, I don't know. It seems to me that the behaviour of Korean people doesn't seem to match their development as a country. I mean, they have so much exposure to all things Western now (like movies, food, etc.) You'd think they'd get used to it.

Oh, I forgot to post this before, kind of funny. I was on the MTR (subway) and this kid was gawking at me. Which SO surprised me because this never happens. Anyway, two seconds later, the kid opens his mouth and starts talking to his mom. They were Korean. Ha ha ha!

[R-Seoul]

I think another thing to bear in mind is that Koreans like to stare. Not just at whitey but at each other too, ever been on a bus where somebody say drops something loudly on the floor - everybody turns around & gawps.

It's also important to remember that in most English speaking countries it is considered rude or provocative to stare, that ain't the case as close as Germany for the Brits. Ever talked english on the subway in Munich? Everybody stares there too.

[the eye]

[Woland]

Compared to ten years ago, the staring here is way reduced now. I hardly ever sense it happening, whereas on my first time through Korea, I felt stared at much of the time. Same thing for being hounded by children in the street. It used to be if I saw children I couldn't a pack following me yelling, "hello, hello". Now, I walk by the middle school in my neighborhood as classes let out and get no reaction at all from the kids. It's nice.

[Smee]

The most intense staring/gawking I've experienced was in Gwangju. Walking through the Chungjangno area, with all the boutiques, western restaurants, cosmetic shops, and neon, people'd stare at me like I had green eyes or something. It was really bizarre. All over Gwangju and other "civilized" places like Seoul or Bundang. I'm in the boonies now, and there's maybe been 3 times in the past 2 months when someone has actually stared at me (compare that to at least 3 times a week up north).

I ignore stares, "herros," and other English. It's a bad habit Asians have picked up, and it'd be stupid for me to acknowledge that behavior.

[Satori]

The staring doesn`t bother me. It`s the fundamental attitudes and assumptions behind it that bother me. Koreans are just profoundly perplexed, threatened, and uncomfortable with non-Korean-ness.

[laogaiguk]

The OP is completely off with there is less or almost no staring in China. He must have lived under a rock Just joking, I think why you say this is because while the Chinese do stare more, it's
1) much less threatening
2) much more respectful (hard to explain, but it's true)
3) More of a "hey look at that, let's get back to what we are doing now."

Still, the Chinese (often enough to say this) went through my grocery cart and things like that. But again, there is nothing behind it except pure curiosity. I don't feel that way atleast half the time I am stared at in Korea.

[Lao Wai]

Laogaiguk,

You might be right about China 'in general'. I haven't been to many places in China and can only speak about the city I lived in. I have heard that it's pretty wicked in other parts of China. Maybe the reason I didn't get stared at in Shenzhen is because the city is made up almost entirely of migrant workers or very wealthy Chinese. Seems maybe the former are too busy working to care, and the later are too 'cultured' to care about my foreigness. I don't know...just a theory.

By the way, is your nickname a combination of Lao Wai, Gai Jin, and Wae-guk-in? Maybe you've lived in all three countries?

[laogaiguk]