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Korean Job Discussion Forums
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Niagara
Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Location: Daegu
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 Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:37 pm Post subject: Toilet talk |
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So, I've just recently moved into a new apartment after my hogwan director decided not to renew the lease on my last place. Our landlord is this half-crazy old woman who insists on knocking on our door at least every other morning (which is quite annoying when you've been out til 4 a.m. Saturday night).
Today she comes in to fix our bathroom door that was sticking on its frame and sees that we have been putting our toilet paper in the TOILET, for god's sake, and then proceeds to go out and buy us a trash basket and tells me, with hand signals, to not put toilet paper in the toilet and to put it in the basket.
I have seen these baskets beside toilets all over Korea, and never once even thought about their possible use, but is the Korean sewage system really so bad it can't handle toilet paper?
The idea of having my USED toilet paper sitting in a bag in the room I am trying to wash myself in just disgusts me.
Anyone out there know anything about Korean sewage? Is this a valid concern for my landlord, or is just another myth along the lines of fan death? |
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Octavius Hite
Joined: 28 Jan 2004
Location: Househunting, looking for a new bunker from which to convert the world to homosexuality.
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 9:49 pm Post subject: |
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| Former plumber here so I know a few things about this. This is mostly a "it used to happen and I refuse to change my ways in the 21st century Korean thing". Back in the day you couldn't flush paper in the toliet, this may still be the case in some very rural areas in korea, but for the most part you can do it anywhere and you will be fine. I have been in Korea for going on 4 years now and never have I put the paper in the basket, its disgusting. Flush away baby! |
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Niagara
Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Location: Daegu
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:01 pm Post subject: |
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| Awesome. Thanks for the advice man...I guess it's just pretend to put the paper in the basket and flush away now. |
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Octavius Hite
Joined: 28 Jan 2004
Location: Househunting, looking for a new bunker from which to convert the world to homosexuality.
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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| What she doesn't know won't hurt her. Just make sure you have a plunger in case you plug it, you don't want to have to call her for help, lol. |
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OiGirl
Joined: 23 Jan 2003
Location: Hoke-y-gun
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:53 pm Post subject: |
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| Niagara wrote: |
| Awesome. Thanks for the advice man...I guess it's just pretend to put the paper in the basket and flush away now. |
Yes...I would keep a decoy basket by the toilet for those times when she stops by. |
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Niagara
Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Location: Daegu
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:00 pm Post subject: |
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| What a ridiculous thing to be talking about...I mean, honestly. It's 200-bloody-6. |
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Octavius Hite
Joined: 28 Jan 2004
Location: Househunting, looking for a new bunker from which to convert the world to homosexuality.
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:16 pm Post subject: |
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| This is, after all, the country where people believe a fan can kill you. That kimchi prevents HIV infection. That hangul is the greatest language ever invented (even though less than 1% of the population speaks it). etc etc etc etc |
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Novernae
Joined: 02 Mar 2005
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| Posted: Sun Dec 10, 2006 1:00 am Post subject: |
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| Thanks Octavius, I've been waiting for some reliable source to confirm that. I'll take a former plumber's word for it. |
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nobbyken
Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Location: Yongin ^^
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| Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 9:04 pm Post subject: |
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If a house is in the country and on a private sewer tank, then the avoidence of flushing paper away means that the tank doesn't have to emptied for many, many years.
If the pipe leading from the toilet to a public sewer is old and has rough edges or just simply broken, then paper will be the first thing to stop and cause a blockage on it's way by. The other stuff always finds it's own way through!
If you never want a toilet to block, do separate flushes for solids (especially if there are many!) and another for the paper. Advice from an old plumber I met. I also used to work at the water utility in rural Scotland.
Happy flushing  |
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Juregen
Joined: 30 May 2006
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 3:07 am Post subject: |
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| If i did a big dump i tend to split the paper and dung too, so 2 flushes. |
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Yesterday
Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Land of the Morning DongChim (Kancho)
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 3:22 am Post subject: |
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I have some students who visit my apartment on the weekends...
one of the students often brings his small brother (8 years old).....
I noticed that whenever his brother comes - afterwards I find "used" toilet paper hidden behind my toilet....
I soon learnt - that the 2 brothers have to place their toilet paper in the basket at their house - (house- not apartment)... so because the little brother couldn't find a basket in my bathroom - he was just embarrased and trying to hide the toilet paper "behind" the toilet.....
I quickly explained to the brothers that is is OK to flush it - and since then - they have always flushed it at my apartment....
the funny thing is - one day when they came - the little brother used up the last of the toilet paper and ALSO tried to flush the cardboard-toilet-roll-holder-thingy also..... such a laugh.........
I learnt later - that koreans living in the old-style houses usually place the paper in a basket - because the plumbing on those older-houses is BAD....
but I also noticed all the public schools (with good plumbing) also do the same thing..??? |
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PimpofKorea
Joined: 09 Dec 2006
Location: Dealing in high quality imported English
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 4:23 am Post subject: |
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| There is nothing nastier than trying to take a mean dump and have to endure the stench of other's people's crap emanating from the waste basket. I don't mind the aroma of mine at all (sometimes I actually enjoy it) but every kim, park, and choi..no thanks. |
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SuperFly
Joined: 09 Jul 2003
Location: In the doghouse
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 4:48 am Post subject: |
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Ah...
This thread calls for the poopy joke!
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All in all, it hadn�t been a good day. Bad traffic, a malfunctioning computer, incompetent co-workers and a sore back all made me a seething cauldron of rage. But more importantly for this story, it had been over forty-eight hours since I�d last taken a dump. I�d tried to jumpstart the process, beginning my day with a bowl of ass cleansing fibre cereal, following it with six cups of coffee at work, and adding a bean-laden lunch at Taco Bell.
As I was returning home from work, my insides let me know with subtle rumbles and the emission of the occasional tiny fart that Big Things would be happening soon. Alas, I had to stop at the mall to pick up an order for the wife. I completed this task, and as I was walking past the stores on my way back to the car, I noticed a large sale sign proclaiming, �Everything Must Go!� This was prophetic, for my colon informed me with a sudden violent cramp and a wet, squeaky fart that everything was indeed about togo.
I hurried to the mall bathrooms. I surveyed the five stalls, which I have numbered 1 through 5 for your convenience:
1. Occupied.
2. Clean, but Bathroom Protocol forbids its use, as it�s next to theoccupied one.
3. **** smeared on seat.
4. **** and toilet paper in bowl, unidentifiable liquid splattered onseat.
5. No toilet paper, no stall door, something growing near base of toilet.
Clearly, it had to be Stall #2. I trudged back, entered, dropped my trousers and sat down. I�m normally a fairly Shameful ****ter. I wasn�t happy about being next to the occupied stall, but Big Things were afoot.
I was just getting ready to bear down when all of a sudden the sweet sounds of Beethoven came from next door, followed by a fumbling, and then the sound of a voice answering the ringing phone. As usual for a cell phone conversation, the voice was exactly 8 dB louder than it needed to be. Out of Shameful habit, my sphincter slammed shut. The inane conversation went on and on. Mr. ****ter was blathering to Mrs. ****ter about the ****ty day he had. I sat there, cramping and miserable, waiting for him to finish.
As the loud conversation dragged on, I became angrier and angrier, thinking that I, too, had a crappy day, but I was too polite to yak about in public. My ass let me know in no uncertain terms that if I didn�t get crapping soon, my day would be getting even crappier.
Finally my anger reached a point that overcame Shamefulness. I no longer cared. I gripped the toilet paper holder with one hand, braced my other hand against the side of the stall, and pushed with all my might. I was rewarded with a fart of colossal magnitude � a cross between the sound of someone ripping a very wet bed sheet in half and of plywood being torn off a wall. The sound gradually transitioned into a heavily modulated low-RPM tone, not unlike someone firing up a Harley. I managed to hit the resonance frequency of the stall, and it shook gently.
Once my ass cheeks stopped flapping in the breeze, three things became apparent:
(1) The next-door conversation had ceased
(2) my colon�s continued seizing indicated that there was more to come
(3) the bathroom was now beset by a horrible, eldritch stench.
It was as if a gateway to Hell had been opened. The foul miasma quickly made its way under the stall and began choking my poop-mate. This initial �herald� fart had ended his conversation in mid-sentence.
�Oh my God,� I heard him utter, following it with suppressed sounds of choking, and then, �No, baby, that wasn�t me (cough, gag), you could hear that (gag)??�
Now there was no stopping me. I pushed for all I was worth. I could swear that in the resulting cacophony of rips, squirts, splashes, poots, and blasts, I was actually lifted slightly off the pot. The amount of stuff in me was incredible. It sprayed against the bowl with tremendous force. Later, in surveying the damage, I�d see that liquid poop had actuallymanaged to ricochet out of the bowl and run down the side on to the floor. But for now, all I could do was hang on for the ride.
Next door I could hear him fumbling with the paper dispenser as he desperately tried to finish his task. Little ****tles of conversation made themselves heard over my anal symphony: �Gotta go� horrible� throw up� in my mouth� not� make it� tell the kids� love them� oh God�� followed by more sounds of suppressed gagging and retching.
Alas, it is evidently difficult to hold one�s phone and wipe one�s bum at the same time. Just as my high-pressure abuse of the toilet was winding down, I heard a plop and splash from next door, followed by string of swear words and gags. My ****-mate had dropped his phone into the toilet.
There was a lull in my production, and the restroom became deathly quiet. I could envision him standing there, wondering what to do. A final anal announcement came trumpeting from my behind, small chunks plopping noisily into the water. That must have been the last straw. I heard a flush, a fumbling with the lock, and then the stall door was thrown open. I heard him running out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.
After a considerable amount of paperwork, I got up and surveyed the damage. I felt bad for the janitor who�d be forced to deal with this, but I knew that flushing was not an option. No toilet in the world could handle that unholy mess. Flushing would only lead to a floor flooded with filth.
As I left, I glanced into the next-door stall. Nothing remained in the bowl. Had he flushed his phone, or had he plucked it out and left the bathroom with nasty unwashed hands? The world will never know.
I exited the bathroom, momentarily proud and Shameless, looking around for a face glaring at me. But I saw no one. I suspect that somehow my supernatural elimination has managed to transfer my Shamefulness to my anonymous ****-mate. I think it�ll be a long time before he can bring himself to **** in public � and I doubt he�ll ever again answer his cell phone in the latrine.
And this, my friends, is why you should never talk on your phone in the bathroom. |
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vdowd
Joined: 11 Feb 2003
Location: Iksan
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 5:42 am Post subject: |
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| Thanks, this is the most I've laughed in months. |
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Niagara
Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Location: Daegu
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| Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 7:20 am Post subject: |
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| I love shi-t jokes. God bless shi-t jokes. |
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