Korean Job Discussion Forums

[jajdude]

A good question, is it not? So many people are shy. I still am, closer to 40 than 30 now. Sometimes it's an affliction, other times it's OK. Do not disregard the immensity of this, and the power it has to overshadow lives. It's real and very common.

Hopefully I'll await a few replies and get back. Of course we have the internet here to find whatever. I'm sure some would be amazed at the largeness of this thing that can color the days and years.

[Hollywoodaction]

No, the question should be...Are you gentle?

[simpleminds]

Here's what I think. Today's society rewards the loudest mouths, the charismatic social butterflies, the ambitious go-getters, and ignores the more introverted, cautious people who tend to work behind the scenes, under the radar. I often wonder how many shy kids are forced to join the soccer team, the drama club, the swimming club, etc, so they'd look good on a resume.

I know some shy people get accused of being snobbish.

I don't see why being 'shy' should be considered a 'problem' (Trust me, I've had teachers call shy kids 'selfish'.) instead of what it is; a personality trait. Perhaps it's an 'affliction', because people haven't understood the need to be alone, they don't understand why one should want to be alone for long periods of time, why one would prefer not to talk when in a room with other people, why one would prefer to observe rather than participate, to listen rather than talk, to see rather than to be seen, to not voice their opinion.

I can only imagine how it can overshadow lives because I'm not shy, not now. But I was a timid kid with no social skills. I've met really shy people, and have noticed that it takes more effort on my part to include them (if they want to be included), and not to ignore them.

[Mashimaro]

I am probably more introvert than extrovert. Needlessly loud people annoy me alot. I imagine many cases of either extreme introversion or extroversion are symptoms of insecurity.

I don't have a problem with someone who is secure in themselves who happens to be very outgoing and expressive, but the "look at me, look at me, I'm funny, I'm a party animal" types are a bit pitiful but mostly aggravating.

[kimchi_pizza]

[simpleminds]

Too right. Never got along with those who like to draw attention to themselves all the time. Too much waste of my precious time.

[Novernae]

[jajdude]

Good point, by affliction or problem I think that's personal. If it's a problem for you, if you feel held back in some ways, that's where it can affect your life.

How does that song by the Smiths go? I think it's summed up pretty nicley in that. I think it's bad for guys who are supposed to initiate things with women. Westerners are stereotyped as being like the characters on 'Friends' -- all outgoing, always meeting new people and so on. Reality is a bit different. Half the people are home alone typing messages like this on internet forums.

[Adventurer]

I don't know if I would say I am shy. People probably wouldn't say I am. However, I am somewhat introverted, but I definitely have a strong introverted side. I like to socialize, but I prefer to be in a cafe rather than a club, but I definitely like bars. Years back, I was pretty shy, I would say, compared to now, but I am more liking to give someone a piece of mind, say what I feel, and confront someone if I must or hit someone up or hit on them for that matter. It is fun to experiment, learn, socialize. We are shy to some degree no matter what. I think sometimes shyness and feeling nervous whenever you do something new touch almost similar veins.

[Doogie]

I think there are different kinds of shyness. I have a strong public speaking background and still have no problem giving speeches in front of a roomfull of people. However, put me in a party situation and I'll be the guy hugging his beer in the corner because I'm too shy dealing with people one-on-one.

[trinity24651]

I was painfully shy when I was in grade/high school. When I went away to college, I really come out of it. I still have times when I feel a need to crawl back into that "shy-shell".

[tesseract]

I was always very shy as a kid. People used to tell me that I needed to come out of my shell. I'm 29 now I and I like my shell. I'm not painfully shy anymore like I used to be. I'm just introverted and that's part of my personality. Other people tend to describe me as reserved or having a laid-back personality. I'm not comfortable in a crowd and I don't like clubs or huge social gatherings. I like to sit back and observe and get to know people before I open up. It takes me some time to warm up to people, but once I do I can be quite outgoing.

I don't really see being introverted as hurting me. It does make dating harder because I'm not good at meeting people and I'm not comfortable going out with strangers. Needless to say, I don't do blind dates or internet dating sites. However, I think spending so much time observing and being an outsider has made me a fairly good judge of character and is a good part of the reason that I have such liberal views today.

Being shy isn't all bad. I think the introverts of the world tend to be more observant and can pick up on the personality traits of other people that more outgoing people don't notice because they are so busy being, well, outgoing.

[Satori]

Im not shy, I just don't like people...

[tesseract]

Satori wrote:

[Moldy Rutabaga]

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