Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Dev]

I've noticed something with my Korean (friends???). Both males and females seem to see nothing wrong with calling me about one hour before we're supposed to meet and just cancelling our date. Why make the date in the first place if you have doubts whether you can make it? This happens frequently enough that I think it's a habit of theirs.

Cultural difference I guess. North Americans usually try their best to honor their original commitments. The person who they made the appointment with gets first priority unless it's an emergency. Koreans are different I guess. Or I'm just meeting all of the unrelaible ones.

[rednblack]

Yeah Dev, I totally agree. I can honestly say in the 7 odd years I've been here I've never (rarely) had a Korean person arrive on time and/or keep an appointment for the given time (wife included). Meetings get cancelled after the arranged time, dinner dates (people) show up, often an hour late, while others just plain forget that arrangements had been made for a certain night. I rarely have many complaints about Korean society, but this is one that gets up me.
By-the-way, I'm not North American, but I believe most cultures (prove me wrong) keep to arrangements, give or take.

[VanIslander]

You get a phone call?

Whenever I make plans with Koreans on a Monday or Tuesday for Saturday it seems like a done deal until nothing comes of it.

I now confirm the night before AND call a couple of hours before getting together.

It is definitely a cultural difference. Big time.

Just as a Korean friend thinks nothing of dropping by and sticking a head into an open window. No boundaries exist to be honoured between friends here, unless you set them yourselves.

[oneofthesarahs]

I don't really have a problem with people outright cancelling plans, but my Korean boyfriend is chronically late. I think it's because he spends so much time fixing his hair.

[twg]

Never had a cancellation, but I've started asking to do things an hour before needed just to make sure Korean folks show up on time.

[jaderedux]

It is a cultural difference. My husband and I fight over this one the most. What time should I be there. When I say 2 O'clock I mean 2 o'clock. Not 3 and not 2:30.

Koreans HATE absolutely hate to say no. So they will agree to something then ooops I forgot don't show up or call with the perenial (sp?) stomach ache. DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN THERE ARE TIMES WHEN IT IS SUCH A GOOD THING I DON'T HAVE MY GLOCK.

I know it is cultural but to be honest it is the one thing that I just can't get used too. I was taught be on time. Punculality is a virtue. It is rude to make people wait...I know, I know cultural differences but for Farks sake either learn to say NO OR I would rather swallow razor blades than spend time with you... OR SHOW THE FARK UP!

JADE
have a nice day

[VanIslander]

jaderedux would make a good German

[jaderedux]

[Mashimaro]

Why keep them as friends if they are flakers?

Haven't had many korean male friends flake on me.
My good female friends are pretty good too.

Seems to happen a lot in dating in Korea. Maybe they
get the first date jitters.. Maybe there bf who you don't
know about demands to meet them. Maybe a 'better'
offer comes along. so many reasons.

Basically they are disrespecting you and you're
better off without people like that in your life.

[jaderedux]

Well because 99% of them do it and that includes my husband, his mother, his father, his sister and 99% of the Koreans I know. Good for you that you found the 1% that doesn't.

Cuz if you say this is not a normal cultural issue I am going to have to call B.S. on ya.

Jade

[Kenny Kimchee]

[JongnoGuru]

[Mashimaro]

[VanIslander]

[djsmnc]

Try this:

Set up private classes with an ajumma to teach her children.

Get the payment at the first lesson.

Show up late for or try to skip a few classes.

You'll feel like there's a manhunt for you and definitely find an exception to Koreans being appointment breakers.