Korean Job Discussion Forums

[regicide]

mixed signals?
By Riki Markowitz
It�s a situation nearly every single man and woman has experienced (and is none too glad about it, we might add): Boy meets girl. Boy is thinking, Wow, I think she�s really into me! Meanwhile, girl is thinking, Why can�t this dude take a hint and leave me alone?

Why are mixed signals like this so common? To get to the root of this misunderstanding, researchers at the Ludwig Boltzmann Institute in Vienna, Austria, observed pairs of men and women who had never met before as they interacted for 10 minutes at a time; they then asked the women whether they were attracted to the male subject.

The results offer plenty of clues as to why dating is confusing: Whether they know it or not, women gave off positive courtship cues (such as hair flipping, chest thrusting and fidgeting with clothing) even when they were not into a guy. Even more frustrating, women gave off more negative courtship cues (arm and leg crossing) when they did like someone. What gives?

�There was hardly any difference in the number of courtship signals given off by those women who did express an interest and those who didn�t,� said Professor Karl Grammer, who headed the research. �And the women who said they were interested in the man gave off more negative signals than those who weren�t interested.�

Why women do this is not completely understood, but those who want to avoid sending men mixed messages may want to make sure they body language supports their agenda. If you�re interested, let him know with a flirty hair toss; if you�re not, cross your arms or legs instead. Meanwhile, a guy who could swear a woman is lusting for him � or is aloof � may want to avoid any snap judgments and gather more info first.

Riki Markowitz is a writer living in Brooklyn.


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Article courtesy of Happen magazine, www.happenmag.com.

[yingwenlaoshi]

Men have had more access on how to clue in on signals. Women know this, so they've devised more ways to screw with our heads even.

Two women talking:

W1: Hey Judy. This article says that when women play with their hair, it means we're into the guy. Crossing legs means we're not into him.

W2: Hmm. I have a date tomorrow night. I don't want the guy to think I'm desperate, so I'll cross my legs.

W2: Yeah, and if he's a loser, play with your hair to screw up his head.

W1: Yeah, get him all worked up.

W2: He'll call you and call you. Lead him on.

W1 and W2: Girl power! (High five)

[princess]

Don't men use these same body language tactics?

[the_beaver]

[twg]

[JongnoGuru]

[yingwenlaoshi]

[BigBuds]

[twg]

I think the process goes like this:

Looking, blinking, smiling, talking, feeding her lots of booze, suggesting, cajoling, begging, balls o blue, laying under your blanket in the fetal position and crying in your loneliness...

[Adventurer]

Well, ancient man used to hunt a lot, right? Sometimes, you had to sit their quietly, patiently before you fired off your bow-and-arrow. Unless, you are simply looking for a toss in the hay for one night, then take your time, don't show all your cards as a man. Don't assume she is so into you, unless it is so obvious. Sometimes, anyway, you might not be into a girl you meet for the first time and might not feel she is for you, because you didn't feel crazy at first meeting. It has happened to me where I thought I couldn't be interested in a particular girl and then I found myself changing my mind. I don't see a need to be in a rush, because you shouldn't quickly assume some gal is good for you. Many gals you thought would be great, turned out not to be so great.

[Hollywoodaction]

[antoniothegreat]

my body language:

interested- i talk to you.

not interested- i dont talk to you.

i think most men are the same.

[Doogie]

[Privateer]