Korean Job Discussion Forums

[princess]

What is the difference between love and obsession??? And...don't you automatically get one with the other? Love does involve some or a lot of obsession, right? Hmmm...

[Sine qua non]

Love is concern for the will of another.

For example:
A) You say you love her, but how can you demonstrate that?
B) When she wants a glass of water, I fetch it.


Obsession derives from a Middle English word referring to an evil spirit. As such it related to the notion of fixation to an extraordinary degree.


Love and obsession can coexist within a person, but the existence of one does not necessarily indicate the existence of the other.




Love is healthy. Obsession is not health.

[jeffkim1972]

Love is complete openness and freedom of your emotions.

how else would the definition be consistent to "loving yourself" and "loving someone else".

If the old saying "you must love yourself before you can love someone else" is true, then if you can fully express all emotions without any fear, then you achieved love for yourself. If you can carry this love to someone else, then good for you.

While obsession could benefit mankind, such as an obsession to find the cure for cancer, or any endeavor, it could be detrimental to a single individual. It is the focusing of emotions on only one (or a few) thing(s), rather than opening up your emotions for more things.

I'm not sure love is an emotion. The concept of God is more an emotion than love. The emotion of God being the mental prostration of yourself, realization of the loss of control. Love being the state of your emotions.

But i wouldn't mistaken companionship with love. Compansionship is not required to feel love.

We can all experience every other emotion without companionship. Fear, hate, happiness, contentment, jealousy, including obsession all don't require companionship.

The other big question is can you describe one emotion without using the other emotions?

[BigBuds]

[VanIslander]

Love selflessly treats another as subject of desires
Obsession selfishly treats another as object of desire

Love is about appreciating what you have
Obsession is about fearing what you can lose

Love and obsession are both blind but only one is deaf.

[SuperFly]

Princess...I love you, but I'm not in love with you.

[the1andonly]

I teach workshops on Healthy Relationships on a regular basis.....

Let me enlighten you a little bit....as yes there is a difference between love and obsession, as one is healthy and the other is not. Sure they can go together, but when they do, again, it is unhealthy.

There are 3 kinds of love:

1. Romantic Love
This is where most relationships begin. You begin seeing each other, you show all your positive qualities, you see their negative one's as cute, or romantic or unique at first. You want to spend all your time together at first to get to know one another...to see if this is someone you want to spend more time with, and perhaps build a future.

*Now its from here , and after a few weeks or months, the relationship evolves into one or two phases....................

2. Addictive Love
This is when the desire to spend time together, every minute together persists. You and you partner no longer participate in outside activities you use to enjoy. There seems to be a power/control/jelous aspect of the relationship. Even when you do spend time apart, you are consumed with the other, wondering what they are doing etc. Less and less time together is happy, and more and more is spent argueing, apologizing a making up.
This is obsession. And this is unhealthy.

3. Nurturing Love
This is when your love grows, and deepens. You recognize each others negative and positive qualities and respect or accept them. You encourage each other: in outside relationships and activities, work, play. You grow together. You can spend time apart without worry or tension. Your love is strong. You respect each other. You trust.
This is a healthy relationship.


*If you are in a 2 relationship: get out. If you are the cause or your partner....its not going to work. You may get married, and you may try to live happily ever after. But it won't work. At some point the power and control tactics will backfire. It will never work. If you find yourself acting this way, get some help for your self esteem or whatever is holding you back.

[mnhnhyouh]

[crusher_of_heads]

I love bdt

[kermo]

[the1andonly]

awww sounds like big miss esler in korea (haha) is trying to one up me with her babble. LOL.

I never proclaimed to be an expert, im going by what my textbooks at work illustrated. Im no expert on relationships, just sharing what I have learned.

If you want to pretend to be the expert go ahead, but we all know how you love to get cornholed by gi's and nigerians in Itaewon.....is that what you consider healthy?

[mnhnhyouh]

[the1andonly]

Sorry to offend...did not mean to start anything. I just don't like when an esl tard tries to play smart. Boils my blood.

As I said, Im going by what my textbooks wrote......I shared my bit of knowledge. Here she comes with her self help book collection bibliography. Sorry to say that I don't need that help, as i am already perfect.

I was trying to be helpful in my original post.

[mnhnhyouh]

[kimchi story]