Korean Job Discussion Forums

[koreakowboy]

To be fair I want to post some positive happenings with reference to the situation.

This morning I again was frustrated when my co-teacher approached me and said she was shocked but the man had apologized and that was the end of the situation.

An hour or so later the call came through from the GEPIK office of education concerning my complaint. The vice-principal, a good man, became somewhat frustrated and started talking to my co-teacher and the other teachers. It was not until lunch that she approached me and asked if I knew everything about the situation. I said I did and was still frustrated nothing seemed to be happening. She then mentioned that the man had offered to clean the school. After further dialogue with me they have now decided to have a meeting about the situation and actually asked what the police could do. I thought at the very least it would give the man a good scare but thought it was important they asked. The vice-principal apologized for how he handled things and the co-teacher apologized for "Korean culture", her words.

I have to commend my school and the GEPIK office for at least trying to understand why I was so upset and not brushing things aside.

For all of you who think nothing can be done in these situations, I hope you at least try.

[CasperTheFriendlyGhost]

Sounds heavy. What the hell are you talking about?

[pkang0202]

You don't have to live with the father. That girl does. I haven't seen Social Services in Korea so I doubt they'll put the girl in protective custody.

#1. Now the whole school knows what a crap father the girl has.

#2. The crap father now has to deal with public humiliation and loss of face.

#3. The crap father will most likely blame this whole thing on his daughter since it was her smoking/drinking that started the whole mess.


I know you just couldn't stand by and do nothing. I understand that and if I were in the same situation, I might do the same thing. The reality is, after August you are going to leave the country. The girl still has to live with her father, who now is humiliated.

What he did was inexcusable, but now that you've taken action, you have to take responsibility for them. I hope things will turn out for the best.

[the eye]

Beatings not done in public will be done worse in private.

[crazy_arcade]

[Typhoon]

Well done! More people need to stand up to things that are wrong. The "culture" excuse is very weak. Wrong is wrong. You can make a difference. Hopefully the dad will think twice before being a dink again.

[oldfatfarang]

Well, everyone's had their say. But I'd like to congratulate the op for standing by his principles/beliefs. You saw a child being physically abused - and you stopped it. Well done. To me this shows you are someone to be admired - someone with the courage of your convictions.

Take heart that your Korean colleagues have also taken notice of your principles - and that they now know not everyone - in every country - is willing to watch a child being abused and not do anything about it. Your intervention shamed them - and rightly so. They now know that while child abuse may be OK in Korean culture - it's still OK for a civilised 'teacher' to protect his students - even from their parents.

I still live with the shame of not intervening in a 'father - daughter' beating in a small/isolated African village. My girfriend and I watched a father repeatedly 'bitch slapping' a young girl and we did not intervene.

This 'father' used force that would likely have broken the daughter's jaw - but the hundreds of Africans looking on did nothing to intervene. After all, she was his daughter - and a female - she wasn't even worth as much as his cattle. We were both aware of the cultural implications of us intervening - we'd likely been kicked to death by the crowd.

So my hat's off to you op. Well done.

[Fresh Prince]

[garykasparov]

[lowpo]

[pkang0202]

Like I said, if I were in the OP's shoes, I might have done the same thing. I really do hope things are all ok. OP, please talk to the girl and let her know that she can talk to you if the problem escalates at home.

[Damulgun]

Wait? The father said he was going to clean the school? For what? I think you should be cleaning it up since you work there.

Police giving this man a scare? WOW are you stupid? Father punished for kid's fucked up behavior except he did it in public. Now some righteous white guy causing more trouble than he really understands.

To all white people. No one needs saving. Only saving we need is from you.

[Typhoon]

Damulgun that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Right is right. Wrong is wrong. An adult hitting a child is wrong. A man hitting a woman is wrong. A 110 kg man beating a 65 kg man is wrong. Rape is wrong. Culture has nothing to do with it. Basic common sense and morality tell us this. Don't use culture as a crutch for base behaviours. Using culture as an excuse for poor behaviour is a sign of weakness and lack of leadership within a community. It also makes OUR world (earth) a worse place to live. If we all think about right and wrong instead of making excuses for doing terrible things the world will be a better place. We are all equal regradless of age or gender and deserve to be treated with respect. The father disrespected all the teachers in that school by putting them in a terrible situation as well as his daughter. I fear for OUR country (Korea) when I hear people like you make excuses for the behaviour of the unthinking masses.

[Typhoon]

One more thing. Being white does not mean someone does not understand Korean culture or Korean thinking. Some foreigners have lived here for over 10, 15, 20 years. They have Korean families and understand a heck of a lot about Korea and Korean "culture". They have as much a say in domestic matters as any full blooded Korean because they make Korea their home. Their children go to school here and they interact with Koreans on a daily basis. Don't discount someone's actions or opinions just because they are white. The eyes often lie. Just some food for thought.

[Jeremiah]

My father is Korean, he used to beat me as a child quite 'badly' as most in western culture would think. I was slapped frequently and occasionally kicked in the face for doing something wrong. Even as a teen it was mostly vocal abuse and a lot of shouting. I wondered if this was the normal thing to do in Korea and my mother being white and western always blamed it on korean culture, but I do know his dad used to beat him as well. I came to korea and talked about how parents punish there children and a girl I got close to said that its not usual for a korean father to be that violent. I dont know if this was true or not, I still dont know. Maybe people are beaten badly but just unheard and its a few selection. I think being beaten did make me stronger, but also I have some bad memories of it. So its a true dilema. But maybe im just a puddy western child who is weak? Maybe dear sir you are weak too and dont see the benefit of being beaten? Or perhaps its just wrong to a certain extent? Was the girl getting beaten in the face? That feels the worst, beatings of the arse and whatever are fine I think if the child had been bad. At least my Dad didnt sexually abuse me or anything, there is much worse remember people. Why punish the mediocre violent parents when much worse goes on behind the doors. I have a ok relationship with my dad, maybe im a mummy's boy?