Korean Job Discussion Forums

[djplatinum]

Hey,

So here is the situation. Me and my friend came over to work together here in Korea. I have taught here one year already and this is my 2nd year. This is her first year. We ended up getting an apartent together even though she was kind of against it at first, but it was ultimately her decision. The school asked if there would be any problems with us working or living together and both of us said there wouldn't be.

We were initially hooking up and were together for like 3 days, literally as soon as we stepped off the plane into Korea she did a 180 and all of her feelings changed towards me and we weren't together anymore. I am still lost at why this happened. She said it was rushed, that she was homesick, it was all new to her being her. Understandable, other than the fact it all happened as soon as we got off the plane and not after being her more than 10 minutes lol.

Anyways, we continued living together and everything was ok. We are still civil with each other. I have been nothing but caring and understanding for her up to this point, but now I know that I have to look out for myself now since she doesn't care about anyone other than herself.

Then she said the other day that she doesn't want to be here and wants to get her own apartment. I said sure if thats what she wants and would make her happy then so be it. Then later on she was saying that if the school were to ask her to pay any money then she would just take off. We kind of got into it and I know she was thinking about taking off anyways.

I think that if she takes off then it would screw me over royally. I think it would screw me over with money that would have to be paid, at work and how people treat me since we were friends and with so many other things.

Neither one of us has our visas yet and have been working at the school for a little over 3 weeks. The school is awesome though and I am suppose to be going to Japan early next week. I have a feeling she will take off when I go to japan. She is Korea-Canadian and doesn't have to get the E4 visa that I do, she gets and F2 visa or something so she gets it in Korea. Both of us have signed contracts and the school took my diploma already (and gave it back) and my transcripts and stuff to get my registration number for my visa.

I guess my question is, how much damage can be done to me if she does take off. How obligated am I to stay at the school since I don't have my work visa yet, but signed a contract and they sent away to get my registration number that should be coming in any day now. Anyone have any suggestions or have had this happen to them before or something similar?

All and any advice is welcome. Thanks.

[sojourner1]

Explain she is a gyopo and it is in her best interest to stay and get to know her country of heritage better and say, "trust me, you will appreciate life more through getting to know Korea." Sounds like culture shock which is a critical period for some, it's the make or break time. It's separates the women from the girls and the men from the boys for sure though social support in my opinion is best and we all deserve that much in making adjustments with the goal of overcoming culture shock and being successful. Oh, wow I'm much happier that I did it.

For her to leave you hanging and run back home to mommy or something like that, that is just weak and squeamish thing to do and would not be right. Try to talk her out of it, see if you can take her to Japan with you.

[mrsquirrel]

The answer to the question

Don't shite where you eat.

[Corky]

ask her if she ever reads Dave's ESL cafe

[Ya-ta Boy]

First, I think you are legally bound to keep faith with your contract. Everything is set for you to go to Japan next week.

The way I read this is that the ex-girlfriend might move out and find her own apartment while you are in Japan (if you go). She's not talking about going home. Right?

I don't see anything in the post saying whether she will stay at the same school or go elsewhere.

In my opinion, you should a) go to Japan b) when you come back and she is 'gone' from the apt and the job (?), you be upfront with the school and say you knew she was unhappy, but didn't know what she was going to do for sure. Tell the school that you are willing to move to a smaller apt if they want you to.