Korean Job Discussion Forums

[SeoulShakin]

Well, 1st period this morning, I had a class of 5th graders. They had to cut out some flashcards at the back of their book for a game this unit, so they all had to bring their scissors to class.
Halfway through class, when they are all standing and singing their song (dance contest included), I noticed one of girls is crying. She's quite the popular one with the boys according to their homeroom teacher, and all the boys are "distracted" by her, and seem to go into a daze when they look at her hahaha. She's quite a quiet, happy student, so seeing her cry is odd. I asked why, and she was too upset to speak. Her friend told me that the boy behind her cut her hair with the scissors. Her hair was in a ponytail. He didn't take off much, but you could see a tiny spot where he chopped, and this really upset her.

This boy is usually a very good student. I've never had a problem with him acting up before, and he's known to the other teachers as a "good student". I wanted to scare him. I didn't want him to think he could continue to get away with this behavior. According to him, he didn't think it was a big deal that he cut her hair. I wanted to prove otherwise.

So I raised my voice. I hardly ever do that. Did the whole "Why are you smiling? This is not funny! Come here!". When he got to my desk, I had my serious face on. I took out my notebook and got him to write his name in it, both English and Korean. He wasn't phased. Then I said "write down your telephone number". He freaked, but wrote it down. I didn't say "I'm phoning your mother", I simply shut my book and said "go sit down please". After he sat down, he became terrified of the prospect of us (co-teacher and I) calling home, and set himself into tears. I figured he'd get over it.

Fast-forward to lunch time. I look over, and he's still visibly upset/crying. He's sitting beside his homeroom teacher, and she's just letting him go. We explained the situation to his homeroom teacher and she said "he is normally good, but I'm glad you scared him, because I don't want him to think he can do these things without consequences".

Since he was so upset, and obviously cried all morning, and realized it wasn't a laughing matter, my co-teacher went and told him we weren't going to call his mother, but he should learn to watch how he behaves from now on. We got full bows, more tears, thank you teachers, etc.

I think he learned his lesson, but by gosh I had no idea it would upset him for THAT long!

I kind of feel bad about it now...

[kat2]

Don't feel bad! He misbehaved, not you! You did a good job setting him straight it sounds like. If I make kids cry b/c they have done something bad, I don't feel bad about it all. Sometimes I get a kid that cries b/c they are embarrssed or something, and then I do feel bad. But if you hit another kid or cut off a girl's hair or rip your book in half, you better believe i'll give you a stern talking too.

[Fresh Prince]

Sounds like you did the right thing. His parents probably would have seriously punished him for it, had they been called.

[Yu_Bum_suk]

Since I stopped teaching hagwon, where I made kids cry all the time, I can count three times when I've made students cry (all last term and all in classes with a crap rookie co-teacher). Two of the times the brats really deserved it. They still wave and say hello and smile when I walk by. The other time I had mistakenly blamed a girl for something she didn't do. I apologised later and I think she understood, but she doesn't smile at or greet me. She has a piss-poor attitude with most of the Korean teachers, too, so maybe it's not just that incident. Still, Korean kids have a very strong sense of justice and injustice, and if you scold or punish them for something they deserve they'll ususally be good as gold the next time around.

[SeoulShakin]

Well I'm hoping he'll be fine the next time around.

If it works out well, I think getting them to write their name and phone number in my notebook might be a good thing haha. I really don't have to get angry often, so it could work.

I didn't mean to make him cry for that long, but I certainly did mean to scare him, and make him know without uncertainty that it was wrong.

I never even had to mutter the words "I'm phoning your mother", he just put two and two together and made the assumption. It's torture of the mind... gosh I'm mean.

[Yu_Bum_suk]

Where do they keep the homeroom class binders at elementary school? At middle and high school, it's either on the teacher's desk in the classroom or you take it from the staff room to the classroom and sign that you've taught the class. All the students photos, names, and parental numbers are in there, so you could just make a point of writing the kid's name and number down from it.

Next time it will probably be a really serious brat who writes down someone else's name and number.

[SeoulShakin]

I have my own classroom, so the students all come to me. I don't have access to their homeroom classroom, unless I make a point of showing up in the middle of one of their other lessons. Good idea though!

[Ya-ta Boy]

[SeoulShakin]

If you read my post, you'd have noticed that I had NO intention of actually calling his parents, simply making him scared, so that he'd realize what he thought "wasn't a big deal", actually WAS.

I was never going to actually phone, only make him think I would, so he knew I took what he did seriously.

[Voyeur]

In my world, past age 6 or so, Boys should not be crying except when physically pained.

Past 11 or 12 - they just should not be crying short of a death in the family.

I wouldn't let a boy I taught think crying is acceptable. I know, I'm a dinosaur. With girls, crying is somewhat okay for me. But guys have to learn to man-up since that is what society expects. I don't make the rules - but I figure we have a responsibility to prepare kids to live under "the rules".

[Alyallen]

[Dome Vans]

I think the punishment fitted the crime. Cutting somebody elses hair is just not on. It's not like talking or not sitting down, his action was a spur of the moment thing probably wouldn't do it again even if you hadn't punished him, but still a serious misjudgement on his part. 10/10 for thinking on your feet there, Seoulshakin.

At school, i used to get smacked around the head, beaten by the nuns, caned by them to. Never did me any harm. Oh yeh I forgot, very low self esteem, scarred for life. Sorry, I'll go now. Sorry to bother you.

[Young FRANKenstein]

[SeoulShakin]

[yingwenlaoshi]

Parents might find out anyway. That kind of thing should be reported to the parents. It's called "detention". Parents have to sign a paper informing them that junior is to be kept after school.

Guess Korea doesn't have that.