Dave's ESL Cafe's Student Discussion Forums

[Timurko]

[CharlesWang]

I am from taiwan. We have same things that give our parent money when I grew up. Nevertheless, It has a little change right now. My parent didn't say that is necessary. They said you just need to support yourself. But I think I will still give money to them when I earn a lot of money.

[proudsouthamerican]

well, maybe is because in western nations, when kids grow up, so obviously their parents are old enough to start getting their pensions

[rui_pedro]

well i live alone with my mother and i have to help her with some money every months, i'm 25 years old and i know that my mother couldn't pay all the expenses of the house, because if i still living with her it' because i want, and if want i need to help in some way.

[Manuel]

[LucentShade]

As an American, I'll confess that I've never given money to my parents, and maybe I am a little selfish because of it. Some kids do give their parents money, but only out of expectation--like when a "child" who is older than 22 still lives with his parents, and gives them money for rent and other expenses. I don't live with my parents, and I pay my own rent and bills. I'm only 24, so I'm still "young" enough that my parents don't expect me to give them anything.

I think it's something about independence--people older than 25 don't want to ask for financial support from other generations. Parents who are in their 30s or 40s would feel silly asking their child for money, because it sends a message that they can't "handle" things by themselves or be independent. Middle-aged parents also don't want to ask their parents for money, unless there is a big crisis or need.

The sad part is that all this "independence" means that people will try to take all that they can from their parents as long as they don't feel guilty. When their parents get old and can't live by themselves, they are often sent to retirement homes instead of living with their adult children and their grandchildren.

[loveville]

hai friends..
i'm from malaysia and i'm also too young to give money to my parent.i'm still study n i'm the eldest in the family.
so,i really understand that i have to give money and take care of my parent when they are getting old..in my culture,there is a quote 'if a parent can take care of their 5 children,then can't the children take care of their parent when they are getting old?'
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hunga

[Bob S.]

Assuming that Blossom was encountering mostly young adult Americans (20's-30's), there is a reason why they don't give money to their parents: older people got all the money!$!
When you look at income for various age groups (a pdf file is available here, see table 1 on sheet 11 of the pdf, or see the various tables available from the U.S. Census Bureau Income Tables), the older a person is, the greater their income until you reach retirement age. Briefly, median income for age groups is as follows:
15 to 24 years . . . $27,780
25 to 34 years . . . 45,982
35 to 44 years . . . 56,523
45 to 54 years . . . 61,861
55 to 64 years . . . 50,538
65 years and older . 24,426
Simply put, why would an older working adult making $50-60k/year expect to receive money from their young adult children making only $27-45k/year? And though the numbers themselves may vary, the trends are consistent for other developed countries.

Add to that the existence of a huge and comfy social safety net to add to a retired worker's company pension, personal investments, and savings, and you have a large older population that simply doesn't need direct income support from their adult children (actually the adult children ARE supporting the older generation through social security taxes). So even if a retired person's income is below the legal poverty level, since their expenses are lower (the home is paid off, they are no longer supporting a large household with the kids now out on their own), they still don't feel a need to request or demand money from their children who now have expensive mortages and family costs of their own. Mostly what I notice is people in their late 30's to 40's paying for luxurious vacations for their retired parents, a way of saying Thanks for all the sacrifices for me.

That is not to say there is not real poverty and serious need in many corners of the U.S. But Americans with passports who travel abroad rarely come from those segments of society. Most Americans you meet, or any foreigners for that matter that hold passports from developed countries, will typically come from middle to upper income classes. So you don't get a full picture of what really goes on economically in their home country.
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"It is impossible to speak in such a way that you cannot be misunderstood." -- Karl Popper

[6platinum]

no, i haven't. But i love to buy gifts for them