Dave's ESL Cafe's Student Discussion Forums

[Becky]

Hello everyone! I'm a Japanese college student. Nice 2 meet u.
Aren't u interested in NATIONAL MARRIAGE??? I want 2 marry a man except Japanese man. I think that NATIONAL MARRIAGE is very wonderful and exciting.

[Bob S.]

Becky-chan,
Yes, international marriage is wonderful and exciting. But it is also difficult, challenging, and sometimes confusing.
Remember that the two people come from different cultures. The woman will think "a man should do this and a woman should do that because that is the way things are in my country and it is natural." Then the man will think "a man should do that and a woman should do this because that is the way things are in my country and it is natural." So EVERYDAY you live in a world where what you think is upside-down and different from how you might expect.
It is not bad if you are ready for it in your heart and mind. People who seek a foreign spouse must on some level deep in their soul feel uncomfortable with their own culture. So when you take a foreign spouse, everyone can see that you ultimately reject some part of your culture; you are more comfortable with some foreigner than your own people. You are not marrying an exotic souvenir from a distant land. You are marrying that other culture and all its strange habits. Not every person is truly ready for this to become part of his or her life.

So when you seek a foreign spouse, think carefully about the foreign culture and country you will become part of. What is normal for them? What are family relations like? That is all mixed with the character and personality of the foreigner you will date. You must be very careful in choosing your spouse (perhaps your foreign fiance is not truly ready for a mixed marriage?). IF you choose well, it can be a wonderful experience. If you choose foolishly and too quickly, it can become an embarrassing distaster. In California, there are many mixed marriages, and I've seen both good and bad.

Is what attracts me to my foreign spouse her different culture or her interesting character that matches mine so well? Probably a mix of both. But I know one thing, I cannot imagine my life without my wonderful Ako-chan.

[Force_9]

I think it's possible...my g/f lives in Taiwan right now...we have not seen each other for almost one and a half years, and we are still together. I hope to marry her if we are still together when we get done with school.
_________________
Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it almighty God. I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death."

[Bebe]

Hope you find someone you love and loves you also. International marriage it is exciting!

[Blossom]

[Bob S.]

[ville]

international marriage has a lots of complicated things,for sure. culture and language is a big one,it does influence on our values.
but i think international marriage will be good,wonderful experience.maybe i have oppotunities to live in foreign countries or learn many things that scholl never teach me. but i dont wanna say that i wanna marry only a forigner... why ppl get married is just they love eachother and decided to be togehter their whole life..its not because they wanted to marry to a foreigner.so i dont wanna say except for japanese or any other countries..

[Snake777]