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Revising a composition V

 
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ClarissaMach



Joined: 18 May 2006
Posts: 644
Location: Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 6:15 am    Post subject: Revising a composition V Reply with quote

This one I wrote about two years ago. I don't remember having submited it here. I was supposed to write a book review, I and chose "The years", by Virginia Wolf.



Essay on Virginia Woolf�s �The Years�

Written in 1937, the novel �The Years� is considered one of the most famous and accessible works of Virginia Woolf. It tells the story of the Pargiter�s family from the year 1880 until someday in the thirties.

In the book, as time goes by, we are to know about the dreams, ideals, and frustrations of three generations of the Pargiter family. The oeuvre is written in such a way that the reader must �fill in the gaps� in order to understand the sequence of facts. Every chapter brings a new year and a new context; nonetheless, each one of them, in a very subtle way, gives some conclusive information about what was going on in the previous ones.

Virginia describes the way things change as the years pass; for example, the way one soon gets used to �cars without horses�, as one of the personages says. The period between the end of the nineteen century and the thirties was a time of great transformation. The apex was the burst of the I World War, which left a severely devastated Europe and a completely changed society. Virginia portraits it all with mastery: even the rhythm of the narrative gets accelerated as the world becomes more and more modern due to technology advances, new concepts, and ideas.

One of the things I like the most about �The Years� is the way the weather is described in some of the book�s passages. It kinds of gives us a �hint� about the things we�re going to read. It�s no surprise that, in the first chapter, the author tell us it was �an uncertain spring�, in which �The weather, perpetually changing, sent clouds of blue and of purple flying over the land�. It�s like Virginia is giving as a warning sign about the uncertain feelings we are to go through. The changing seasons are there to remind us about the passage of the time and the perpetual cycle of life that keeps things going on and on.

For all these reasons, �The Years� is one of my favorite books ever.
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tyreless



Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 46
Location: Colombia

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 11:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hello Clarissa very good composition. Minor changes I'd make would be:
Quote:
It tells the story of the Pargiter�s family from the year 1880 until someday in the thirties.

I would leave out "someday in"
Quote:
In the book, as time goes by, we are to know about the dreams, ideals, and frustrations of three generations of the Pargiter family.

Definitely "get to know" instead of "are to know". The later I would understand as an obligation to know something before reading the book.
Quote:
The period between the end of the nineteen century and the thirties was a time of great transformation. The apex was the burst of the I World War, which left a severely devastated Europe and a completely changed society.

Perhabs "change" instead of "transformation". Transformation sounds rather technical.
"apex" is rather unusual usage. Perhabs make it a verbal structure. eg "...great change, culminating in World War I, which..."
Quote:
It�s like Virginia is giving as a warning sign about the uncertain feelings we are to go through.

Change "as" for "us". Probably only a typo.

Beyond that excellent composition. Take care and hope to hear again from you soon
David
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ClarissaMach



Joined: 18 May 2006
Posts: 644
Location: Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 4:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks!!!!
Smile Smile Smile
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