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tisogai
Joined: 09 Feb 2006
Posts: 196
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 Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2008 5:38 am Post subject: not to offend others |
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Please help;
I know that we say "Take care not to catch a cold", but some grammar book teaches that we can't say "We should try to express our feelings as indirectly as possible not to offend others". Instead, it has to be "--- possible so that we won't offend others".
Is that right??
Thanks. |
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tyreless
Joined: 22 Jul 2008
Posts: 46
Location: Colombia
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| Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
I know that we say "Take care not to catch a cold", but some grammar book teaches that we can't say "We should try to express our feelings as indirectly as possible not to offend others". Instead, it has to be "--- possible so that we won't offend others".
Is that right?? |
If I understand you right the assumption of the grammar book is that the more indirect we express our ideas the more polite we are.
In principal this is right but not always advisable. The sentence "Give me the pen." would be impolite. "Please give me the pen." or "Give me the pen, please." perfectly correct, whereas "Would you please have the kindness to pass me the pen." would already be exagerated. Returning to your sentence "Take care not to catch a cold." we also need to take the content of the sentence into account. If the person addressed does catch a cold it would probably not be the speakers problem. So not catching a cold is in the addressees own best interest. If the sentence were "Please take care not to catch a cold. I don't want to go traveling with someone who is ill." the speaker has an own interest in the addressee not catching a cold.
As a rule of the thumb be polite but don't let politeness get in the way of communication. Expressions like "please", "Could you please..", "would you be so kind as to...", "I'm sorry to bother you, but..." are common and polite enough.
1. "Please pass me the knife/Pass me the knife, please."
2. "Could you please pass me the knife/Could you pass me the knife, please."
3. "Excuse me Sir but would you please be so kind as to pass me the knife."
4. "I'm sorry to bother you Sir, but would you please be so kind as to pass me the knife."
1. and 2. are common and sensible usage. 3. and 4. are a bit exagerated already but are used.
I might add that above usage is based on observations in the UK where people have a well founded reputation for being ridiculously polite.
I do this hope this helps and if you have any queries please do not hesitate to let me know
David
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Consume less - live more |
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tisogai
Joined: 09 Feb 2006
Posts: 196
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| Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 7:16 am Post subject: |
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Thanks so much for the reply, David.
But unfortunately I now know that I didn't make myself understood....
My quiestion was;
Can these two sentences be re-written into the respective way??
1. Take care not to catch a cold.
= Take care so that you won't catch a cold.
2. We should try to express our feelings as indirectly as possible no to offend othes.
= We should try to express our feelings as indirectly as possible so that we won't offend others.
Look forward to hearing from you, thanks again. |
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