Nominations for The House of Horrors

JuanTwoThree · Post by **JuanTwoThree** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 10:37 am

Make them convoluted but correct.

My nominations: "If that bridge hadn't been being worked on so much last week, it might have still been being built"

And a farmer asked what he does with his carrots: "We eat what we can and what we can't eat we can. "

Duncan Powrie · Post by **Duncan Powrie** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 11:31 am

Sorry to spoil your fun, but I made them less convoluted (and correct):

They worked hard on that bridge last week, so it's finally (been) finished, at last! (And obviously, if they hadn't, it [still] wouldn't be finished now).

We eat some and throw away the rest.

revel · Post by **revel** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 12:15 pm

Hey all!

One from Spanish:

"¿Cómo como? Como como como."

(How do I eat? I eat the way I eat.)

And how's this one:

That's the one he had had, had he had it.

And, finally, any quote from shunxui, when he manages to write a correct sentence....(forgive me, couldn't resist....)

peace,
revel.

Richard · Post by **Richard** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 3:52 pm

JuanTwoThree wrote:"We eat what we can and what we can't eat we can. "

Duncan, sorry to spoil your fun, but I think the final can means "to put in cans" (i.e., tins), not "to throw away".

Duncan Powrie · Post by **Duncan Powrie** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:51 pm

Oh, I see.

Now that you point it out, I am sure I have heard that joke somewhere before, but at the time I wrote my reply, I had read the "eat what we can" as meaning the carrot crop was of low quality ("Yuck! I can't eat most of these horrible-looking carrots!") rather than being so bountiful (and yummy) that there was more than could possibly ever be eaten even by carrot-loving farmers who regretfully have to tin the majority of their lovely orange "babies"!

Did I overlook anything in the first sentence?

Richard · Post by **Richard** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 4:56 pm

I hate the first sentence and steadfastly refuse even to look at it.

Duncan Powrie · Post by **Duncan Powrie** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 5:00 pm

More a simple tongue-twister than anything clever, but try saying it fast (don't read it!) straight away and you may get a not totally "pleasant"

surprise:

I'm not a pheasant plucker
I'm a pheasant plucker's son
I'll keep on plucking pheasants
'til the pheasant plucking's done.

Taught to me by a Singaporean. I "surprised" myself first time (as he'd hoped I would).

JuanTwoThree · Post by **JuanTwoThree** » Mon Oct 25, 2004 9:59 pm

In the exam, where James had had "had", Pete had had "had had". "Had had" had had the approval of most of the examiners.

Where did you put that book we used to read out of from back to?

Both oldies but goodies.

Harzer · Post by **Harzer** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 12:17 am

My day always starts with a *beep*, shower, shampoo, shave, shoeshine and a short session with a sheila.

NB sheila is Oz slang (dated) for girl

Harzer

Harzer · Post by **Harzer** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 12:18 am

I did not write *beep* - work it out for yourselves.

Harzer

Stephen Jones · Post by **Stephen Jones** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 7:22 am

Why do you shine your shoes before you shag the sheila. Do you do it with your shoes on? Is she that kinky?

JuanTwoThree · Post by **JuanTwoThree** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 7:38 am

It's in order of how long each activity takes. The last is a matter of seconds.

lolwhites · Post by **lolwhites** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 9:26 am

The sixth sheikh's sixth sheep's sick

Harzer · Post by **Harzer** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 12:59 pm

Because I can look up her dress in the reflection!

Harzer

lolwhites · Post by **lolwhites** » Tue Oct 26, 2004 1:21 pm

Also from Spanish:

¿Como quieres que te quiera si el que quiero que me quiera no me quiere como quiero que me quiera?

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Nominations for The House of Horrors

Nominations for The House of Horrors

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