Job Discussion Forums

[Augustus]

hello,

I'm having an absolutely disastrous time on my CELTA course at the moment. I received another below standard yesterday (have 4 to date for all different reasons) and have been told I NEED to get a to standard next week on a grammar lesson. I have dyslexia and struggle to teach things I do not thoroughly understand myself, but between Thursday (when we get planning time with the tutor) and Tuesday (when we teach) I have to learn, design and then implement a lesson plan.

I got "have to" / "has to" this week and I struggled to design concept questions or to thoroughly explain the concept to the learners. I spent 3 days on the planning this time and I am absolutely gutted that I got a below standard on this occasion. I was so unsure of my material and the examiner was visiting too. The person who was supposed to do the first lesson 9.30-10.10 was "running late" and wasn't prepared so I ended up going on first at 10am (should have been 2nd and 10.10). I began to realise that I was going to be the one to be observed and became increasingly nervous so by 10am I was a nervous wreak (although I have become v.good at hiding it and always get a comment re my calm exterior).

The lesson was a nightmare; my concept questions were harder than the concept I wanted to teach - I just could not get my head around it. I struggled with the phonology and although I had written it down I struggled in explaining it.

I got an email this afternoon with my feedback and saying that as I had now received 4 below standards I need to get this one to standard otherwise Cambridge won't recommend a pass. My other Not to Standards are

1/ not submitting a coversheet prior to the lesson (I did but it was a draft and I didn't get chance to look over it and resend)
2/Lesson from hell which was awful on all sorts of minor points
3/ I became flustered in the lesson and swapped two aspects of the lesson around which made it in the wrong order. In mitigation, I fractured both my wrists the week before and had to have painkillers to get through the day.
4/ Seems to be purely based on that I struggled to convey meaning and demonstrate concept questions/phonology

The guy who was "running late" spent the rest of the morning finishing off his lesson prep and managed a pretty good lesson!

I feel so utterly deflated that I have put so much into this course and I am passing by the skin on my teeth.

Aug

[HLJHLJ]

Forgetting about the course for the moment. Do you actually feel like you could do this day in day out for however long you are planning to teach? Will you be able to cope explaining things to a class when you've only had an hour to prep (if you are lucky)? I'm asking because the things you are struggling with are the bread & butter of ESL teaching. So is the course bringing out the worst in you or is there a bigger problem?

[Augustus]

I think I need to have a far better understanding of grammar - two of my below standards have been on grammar lessons. I have dyslexia and although I've worked hard on it over the years to counteract my spelling, handwriting and all the other obvious markers for dyslexia. I still need to overlearn to be able to explain a concept to others - this applied to my uni exams too. To be able to write a good essay I needed to understand an issue back to front which made completing work time consuming. As soon as I finish the course I planned to pursue at least one advanced grammar course to get to grips with the issues.

I also struggle enormously with self esteem and confidence issues - apparently they are much of the reason why I struggle with low levels of depression/anxiety as I allow it to interfere too much and jar my sense of self. This is the bravest thing I have ever done and I was getting to really enjoy the course as it seemed to clicking at last then thi.vs went to pot when I broke my wrists.

[nomad soul]

[HLJHLJ]

I do understand the difficulties you are having, and a lack of confidence can be a major problem (as NS has said, volunteering can help with that). However, you haven't really answered my question.

Do you think the difficulties you are having are specific to the course or to teaching in general?

Are you going to be able to get beyond your issues with over-learning and produce lesson plans in a timely manner on a daily basis? An advanced grammar course will probably also help with your confidence, but if you really are struggling to explain a fairly low level point after 3 days planning, it suggests there are bigger problems.

[Sashadroogie]

Sorry to hear that you are going through this rough time. However, perhaps HLJHLJ has a point. It may be that EFL teaching just isn't for you. If so, then there's no shame in that.

Whatever the case may be, I'd sit down with your tutors and ask them what their view is, and take their advice and apply it to the letter in your next assessment.

All the best.

[daniel_hayes]

I feel for you Augustus. When I did the CELTA I was going through a a rough time, and like you I suffered/suffer from issues related to anxiety. For people who suffer from such issues, a CELTA can seem like a ride through hell. I can't begin to tell you how stressful I found it.

But I came through the other side, and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Even if I would've failed, that would have been okay by me .... you only learn from mistakes.

From reading some of your posts, I think that you are taking it TOO seriously (believe me, I know that it is easy to give such advice!!) But I think people like you make very very good teachers. Maybe not so relaxed and easy-going (inside), but you care about the job and try your best.

I would say to try your best for the remainder of the course. Do your tutors know about your issues? Mine didn't and they made certain allowances when I divulged them (again trust me, I know what it is like when you feel you don't want to be treated differently, but then in certain situations you feel like you react differently)

I agree with getting some classroom experience. I finished my CELTA and then volunteered with refugees in the UK. I also think the actual work is less stressful than the CELTA. And it gets less stressful every day/week.

Keep in there, try and relax, finish the course and do your best. The more you over-think the grammar the worse it gets. Do you have Raymond Murphy 'Essential Grammar' and Teaching Tenses -- they are both v helpful. Use the templates the tutors give you, and practise your class a lot so you know what will go on at all times.

I am sure others can help you. Good luck. Try to stay calm.

[Xie Lin]

[artemisia]

Augustus

My suggestion to you is to try not to worry too much about the whole pass/fail business, but see how much you can get out of this course. I know that�s a lot easier said than done, but I think it�s quite likely the experience of it will increase your overall confidence as long as you decide you�re not going to feel crushed by not passing this time � if that is indeed what happens.

I second Nomad Soul�s suggestions, which I imagine you could set up a later point. In the meantime, you still have a chance to get through. Apart from consulting with course tutors, how about setting up some kind of practice run if you can? Can you rope in and corral a bunch of native speakers to be your �students� for a session? You�d all have to act as though it�s a real lesson and you deliver your lesson to them as though they are real ESL students. Role playing might make you feel stressed, but it could be helpful for two reasons:
(a) It will probably help sort out any logistical problems (what order to give things out, etc)
(b) The 'students' can give you feedback on how smoothly you moved between activities and if they followed your instructions/ explanations. (Be wary if they offer you any grammar advice, though!)

Not long ago I gave a test I made to native speakers. I got all kinds of valuable input and feedback from doing that. If native speakers don�t know what a teacher's going on about, you can assume real students probably won�t either.

You might decide in the end that teaching English language is not for you, but it would still be good to try to tackle the lack of confidence issues.

[coledavis]

I think I would go for a combination of Nomad Soul's idea and that of the others. If CELTA doesn't work out, try following NS's route of acting as a teaching assistant and see if it grows on you. Then maybe ask to a bit of teaching at the place where you are assisting. If it seems better, maybe then try another course (having practised some lesson planning and teaching while an assistant). If the spell as an assistant really does not make you confident, then follow the other advice and think about leaving teaching.

You may consider looking at alternative careers. One free career choice resource that many find useful is www.careersteer.org

[Augustus]

Hi

The tutor asked me to go in early on Thursday for lesson planning and she spent ages with me planning out the coming lesson. She said that the examiner felt that I was one of those people who needed just a few more weeks to perfect conducting my lesson. She said she had no issues with allowing me to pass as the only area of concern was a single aspect. She can see its a confidence issue in feeling that I know my stuff ... She can envisage me teaching in the future and being good at it.

I am looking at volunteering although a little concerned that the teaching won't be the same format as what I am doing now and maybe they will be less fussy which won't help me really.

I told the tutor on Thursday about my anxieties and she said that I seriously did not perceive me that way. I told her that I had issues in the past re exams (I got my own room awarded due to panic attacks) but I thought I had got beyond it. I actually went on a improv comedy course to try and address the issue - admittedly I struggled with relaxing here. Obviously it still exists to an extent though but I have come so far since I started out!

I've also spoken to the psychological wellbeing practitioner which was helpful too and he advised some breathing exercises.

I don't have the books you mention - I looked in the library for Teaching Grammar by Scrivener but they only have one copy. I will buy some of these books for the future though - I bought the essential books and figured I could borrow anything else and see just how much use they were.

Artemisia - what a great idea! I'm not sure I can manage running an actual lesson but I could do it in my head I could ask a friend to comment on my materials too, that might help me a little.....

I am getting to really enjoy teaching, the examiner visiting knocked me completely out ;(( and has messed up my stride as I was doing so well. I panicked so much and made it more complicated than it is and that lead to me being unable to come up with some useful concept questions........ it was just a disaster.

Thanks again for all the advice. I feel much better than I did the day I posted the OP.

Aug

[Augustus]

Thanks Coledavies for the linky. I've just given it a go and these are the results ...

Profile Page

Investigative = 28
High scorers tend to favour scientific, technological or mathematical jobs. Analytic, intelligent and sceptical; may not always relish leadership roles
Social = 25
High scorers usually become involved in direct work with people often in caring or developmental roles. Likely to be fairminded and understanding; often lacking mechanical/scientific ability
Conventional = 19
High scorers may favour financial or clerical work. Accurate and conscientious; may not be particularly imaginative or able to deal with unclear situations
Enterprising = 19
High scorers may enjoy sales, buying, management, business or promotion. Likely to be confident and sociable; may lack scientific ability and avoid complex topics
Practical = 14
High scorers like practical work. Inclined to a common sense, down to earth view of the world; not necessarily most comfortable when working with people
Artistic = 6
High scorers are typically interested in music, drama, writing or decoration. Creative and expressive; may tend to lack clerical skills and may be seen by others as disorderly
Investigative: Highly Recommended
Social: Highly Recommended
Conventional: Possibly worthwhile examining
Enterprising: Possibly worthwhile examining
Investigative and Social are highly recommended
Practical and Investigative are recommended
Investigative and Conventional are recommended
Investigative and Enterprising are recommended
Social and Enterprising are recommended
Social and Conventional are recommended
Practical and Conventional are possibly worthwhile examining
Practical and Enterprising are possibly worthwhile examining
Practical and Social are possibly worthwhile examining
Investigative and Artistic are possibly worthwhile examining
Artistic and Social are possibly worthwhile examining
Enterprising and Conventional are possibly worthwhile examining

[coledavis]

You should go further, to use the filters, as these will give you ever-diminishing lists of possible careers.

[artemisia]

[Augustus]

Well I did my teaching practice this morning and I got a Standard ........

It wasn't the best lesson ever taught, but it definitely went well. Plus I opted to teach for an extra 10 mins too so I actually did 50 mins. I managed to motivate/interest and involve the student who thinks its all optional.

I don't think there will be a problem with my assignments.

Now my thoughts have turned to the future, I will be looking at jobs with support/mentoring included in the role which having had a look on the Jobs board don't seem to be very common.

I will also look into volunteering for the next few months until I can find something.

Thanks everyone for listening, support and advice.

Augustus