Job Discussion Forums

[dervish]

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[OzBurn]

I do not maintain that absolute equality is needed, but when your income is literally ten or fifteen times that of another person, AND the other person barely makes enough to live on (let alone buy books, go to cafes, travel, attend university, take music lessons, study foreign languages, etc.), then it may be relatively difficult in many cases to form an interesting or enduring friendship. People in the Western world are, for the most part, roughly equal in income. There is not a great deal of practical difference between a single person who makes 35 000 USD a year and one who makes 55 000 or 75 000 (I know, I've been at all three levels, and much less, too).

Don't get me wrong -- 75 000 is more pleasant, all thing being equal, than 35 000. But both levels allow you to enjoy most of life's pleasures. If at 25K or 35K you cannot dine out so often, yet you can buy a cookbook and learn to cook fine meals at home (more pleasant, anyway). You cannot buy a "fine" guitar, perhaps, but you can buy a serviceable instrument that will let you enjoy music, and you can pay for lessons. You cannot buy all the books you want, but you can get to the library and borrow what you want. You cannot travel in four-star hotels, but you can find a nice enough place to enjoy the foreign country.

I do think unequal friendships are possible, but they are rarer, and more difficult.

[OzBurn]

Also, I don't think you can fairly compare expatriates to locals. Of course Germans and French and other expatriates are more friendly than locals; they know relatively few people (not having spent their entire lives in the country); their social circles among other expats are constantly being diminished by people returning to their home countries or travelling on; and just by their very nature, they are interested in foreign people, new ideas, and alien ways of life. I doubt that you would find French and Germans so friendly in their home countries. As a simple comparison, I have sometimes had conversations with or helped translate for monolingual (or at least non-English-speaking) French travellers here in Vietnam. They are generally quite well disposed to listen to my slow and inaccurate French. This is not always the case in France itself. (I'm not saying that "the French" are rude; many French people are quite nice, esp. outside of Paris. However, I suspect that they are much more willing to deal with my French here in Vietnam than they might be when they're at home.)