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canadian-girl
Joined: 07 Aug 2004
Posts: 46
Location: yangmei, taiwan
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 Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:19 am Post subject: New to Japan....looking for advice |
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hi hi! well, since this is my first time living in japan, I'm wondering what little things i should be aware of. Things from etiquette(especially for females), things i should remember to bring from home that i might not find there, etc. I am going to be in hekinan, which is near Nagoya. and sorry...whats this about 'the big one?' (earthquake)? I've never been in an eaqrthquake, only tornadoes, lol...so that makes me a little nervous. Any advice would be great! Anything positive and good/funny comments are great! THANK YOU...heehee...I'm so excited.  |
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PAULH
Joined: 28 Jan 2003
Posts: 4672
Location: Western Japan
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| Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:28 am Post subject: |
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Yours is a very general question and there are many women here who can help you...
A good source of info aimed at women is a book here written by women for women in Japan. This should help if you have any particular questions.
http://www.being-a-broad.com/ |
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Eleckid
Joined: 03 Jun 2004
Posts: 102
Location: Aichi, Japan
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| Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 4:17 am Post subject: |
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I live 10 min train ride from Nagoya.
A lot of men in Japan are perverts, they like touching women's butt or breast in trains. So please watch out. If that happens to you, make a big deal out of it (if you can find out who it is), this is what I've read from the "women in Japan" pamphlet I got from my TESOL class.
About the big earthquake, yes it's coming. I suggest you to bring a good first aid kit as well as a good emergency kit for earthquakes, cuz it's hard to find it here esp if you're new to Japan. They don't really have good ones anyways. Once you arrive, find the nearest emergency shelter, usually an elementary school, you'll need to run there if the big earthquake strikes. Just ask your employer or your co-worker once you arrive, ok?
Good luck! |
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Glenski
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Posts: 12844
Location: Hokkaido, JAPAN
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| Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 6:51 am Post subject: |
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You might also want to look at this web site for some really good basic information.
http://thejapanfaq.cjb.net |
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G-money
Joined: 23 Jul 2004
Posts: 14
Location: Victoria, BC
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| Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 7:31 pm Post subject: |
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Canadian Girl, I'm gonna be leaving for Nagoya tommorow (sept 16) for two weeks training. Then I'm off to Aomori City. I'm from Victoria, BC as well. Good luck with everything!  |
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Mike L.
Joined: 28 Feb 2003
Posts: 519
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| Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 9:50 pm Post subject: |
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[quote]Then I'm off to Aomori City. [/quote]
Said it once I'll say it again. You're lucky Aomori, is a great place. The people are super friendly.
Good luck! |
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Dominique
Joined: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 141
Location: Juso, Osaka
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| Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 2:19 am Post subject: |
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| Eleckid wrote: |
I live 10 min train ride from Nagoya.
A lot of men in Japan are perverts, they like touching women's butt or breast in trains. So please watch out. If that happens to you, make a big deal out of it (if you can find out who it is), this is what I've read from the "women in Japan" pamphlet I got from my TESOL class.
Good luck! |
I heard that some women carry a small pin so they can poke the perv  |
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Chris12
Joined: 25 May 2004
Posts: 98
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| Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 2:25 am Post subject: |
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Hello Canadian Girl. I had posted a letter but for some reason it is not here. Let me give you some advice on how to make adjusting to life in Japan easier and a lot more positive. Don't hang around with too many foreigners, specially Westeners. Why? Because most are too negative. Their negative attitude will rub off on you. I do have some Western friends but they are like me, in that they have a positive attitude and so are fun to be around. Too many times, I have sit with a Westerners and listened to him or her talk about how bad life is in Japan. I would wonder "if life was so bad why are you still here?" I already noticed a post that most Japanese men are perverts! Don't listen! Of course be careful, but you should always be careful no matter what country you are in. There are good people and bad people everywhere.
Try to experience the culture, enjoy the food. If you need any advice of some friendly places to go socialize in Nagoya I would be more than happy to make a few recommendations! |
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Eleckid
Joined: 03 Jun 2004
Posts: 102
Location: Aichi, Japan
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| Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2004 2:46 am Post subject: |
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"I heard that some women carry a small pin so they can poke the perv"
Wow! I didn't know that! From what my Japanese friends told me, they said they usually step on them, elbow them, or just use like a bag or a tennis racket to protect themselves. I've never heard of carrying a small pin!
I've never got touched in Japan (I got touched once in Canada! Gross!), I think they usually target uniformed highschool girls, & the fact that I don't take the train often (I bike to school). I also live in a small suburb where there are less people.
Yes, I agree that not all men in Japan are pervs, but it seems like all of my female Japanese friends have been touched many times when they were in highschool, so I guess adults are not big targets.
It's true that we shouldn't hang out with any other foreign teachers. I don't have any friends who are foreign teachers here, I only hang out with Japanese people, so I can learn as much culture as I can. All those complains about Japanese men being pervs are actually from them. I don't know any female teachers at my school who got touched before. Anyway, just be careful & don't let yourself be in a dangerous situation no matther where in the world you are.
About the food, hey have you guys tried the yaki onigiri which comes frozen from Shop 99? I was just eating some while writing this & they tasted great! No burnt taste~
I think one of the things that kept me here (besides my friends) are the food. |
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canuck
Joined: 11 May 2003
Posts: 1921
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2004 4:37 am Post subject: |
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I think it's natural to be nervous, but also make up your own mind when you're over here. There are always going to be people who are disenchanted about their situation or lack of one. Many foreigners avoid foreigners here because it's an easier way to improve your language ability and experience a different culture.
It all depends on where you're at. You might not have the choice of being able to hang out with other foreigners. I've met some great people here, from many different countries, not just Japan or Canada.
I think the dating situation is harder for foreign women over here compared to foreign men. I think that's the hardest thing for many women to adjust to. |
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Chris12
Joined: 25 May 2004
Posts: 98
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| Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2004 6:23 am Post subject: |
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| canuck wrote: |
I think it's natural to be nervous, but also make up your own mind when you're over here. There are always going to be people who are disenchanted about their situation or lack of one. Many foreigners avoid foreigners here because it's an easier way to improve your language ability and experience a different culture.
I think the dating situation is harder for foreign women over here compared to foreign men. I think that's the hardest thing for many women to adjust to. |
Why is the dating situation harder for foreign women in Japan? |
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canuck
Joined: 11 May 2003
Posts: 1921
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Fri Sep 17, 2004 6:36 am Post subject: |
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| Chris12 wrote: |
Why is the dating situation harder for foreign women in Japan? |
I'll give you the quick and straight forward and a general explanation. Many Japanese women have more free time than their male counterparts. Guys are horny and less choosy. Guys over here tend to chase both Japanese women and foreign women. Many guys think that they can date foreign women when they get back to their home country. Many want to learn Japanese too. Many find it really easy to get laid. Often the guys don't care about a language barrier. Again, very general, but there is a lot of truth to it.
Many foreign women need more to a relationship and often look at a language barrier as a big negative. Many Japanese guys work longer than their female counterparts. Many Japanese guys are really shy too. SO many foreign women find themselves competing with Japanese women for the foreign male dating pool.
Many of my female friends from Canada found it very lonely in the relationship department over here. Many of them have said, "I don't think I've read so many books in my whole life."
This doesn't happen to all foreign women, but I'm sure many can relate though. That's why I said that I think the dating situation is harder for foreign women over here compared to foreign men and why it's the hardest thing for many women to adjust to. |
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BradS
Joined: 05 Sep 2004
Posts: 173
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 10:55 am Post subject: |
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From my experience (and I hope I don't offend anyone) Japanese girls (especially those who have never left Japan) seem to be REALLY up for dating a foriegn guy. Normally all I have to say is "Hi." to get some flicking of hair, long stares and flirtatious smiles. Japanese women of all ages seem to love white guys. Funnily enough Japanese guys have told me this more than other teachers. In fact, I've had several students ask me to help them pick up women. 
Japanese men on the other hand seem to be intimidated by non Japanese women. Most assume they're already married.
About being groped. I'm a guy and I've had my hand LICKED by an old Japanese man my arse pinched by a Japanese woman.... the list goes on. Maybe I've just got the look, but I've found riding Tokyo trains to be a free for all.  I feel so violated.  |
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denise
Joined: 23 Apr 2003
Posts: 3419
Location: finally home-ish
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| Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 1:12 pm Post subject: |
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Why go out of your way to avoid other foreigners? Maybe I'm just lucky, but the other foreigners here, both those that I work with and those that I've met in the community, are friendly, interested in Japan, speak decent Japanese, and don't just travel around in a big pack-o'-gaijin. In my opinion, if you deliberately avoid contact, you're really just narrowing your potential pool of friends and losing people who can understand and commiserate. It is possible to socialize with other foreigners and still experience Japan.
d |
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AgentMulderUK
Joined: 22 Sep 2003
Posts: 360
Location: Concrete jungle (Tokyo)
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| Posted: Sun Sep 19, 2004 2:34 pm Post subject: Re: New to Japan....looking for advice |
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| canadian-girl wrote: |
| hi hi! well, since this is my first time living in japan, I'm wondering what little things i should be aware of. Things from etiquette(especially for females), things i should remember to bring from home that i might not find there, etc. I am going to be in hekinan, which is near Nagoya. and sorry...whats this about 'the big one?' (earthquake)? I've never been in an eaqrthquake, only tornadoes, lol...so that makes me a little nervous. Any advice would be great! Anything positive and good/funny comments are great! THANK YOU...heehee...I'm so excited. |
Firstly try not to worry and think of Japan as an alien country.
Its very westernised, ridiculously so. You can buy anything you need here.
Etiquette
Most of the stuff you read in Japanese culture guides is written by people who don't know what else to do except over-analyse things to the n-th degree. The stuff in those kind of books applies to the Japan of old. Not to today. I have seen most of the 'classic' don't do's repeatedly ignored by the Japanese themselves, except in very formal situations ,where it should be obvious that you have to carry yourself with a certain level of dignity, as in any country on Earth. (hope that doesn't come across as all high & mighty or patronising)
Just try to use common sense and be polite. Nothing particularly strange about that.
You are not Japanese, never will be,so you are not expected to behave as such. You will therefore be forgiven for any blunders, except the shoes thing (see below). It's also pretty unlikely you will find yourself in these ultra-formal situations anway. If in doubt just copy everyone else!
Shoes
One must do is the removal of shoes upon entering someone's house (quite common practice in some western countries anyway, so again, its no big deal)
One nice thing you can do is to point your shoes toward the door, after you take them off. My father-in-law noticed it and commented upon it and it earned me several beers.
Chopsticks
Try not to stab stuff with them. And don't try to take a piece of food if another person is also trying to do something to that same piece of food. It resembles a funeral rite and it will put your Japanese mates off their food.
Bringing stuff from home
As for bringing stuff from home, don't worry, except for English language books, but even that is optional as there are shops that sell them here and also amazon, etc. (of course I don't know about specifically girls' things!)
Of course, more money than you think you will need is always a good idea.
Earthquakes
Most earthquakes here are almost non-events. It just feels like someone is shaking your door a little.
If it's a very rare bigger one, just follow what everyone else does (nothing, probably) and watch the TV which gives instructions to follow in English, if you have a stereo TV (which are almost standard)
In summary, relax and be yourself and try to enjoy Japan. The Japanese will like you more. They are fascinated by different people. |
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