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Eleckid
Joined: 03 Jun 2004
Posts: 102
Location: Aichi, Japan
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 Posted: Sat Nov 06, 2004 3:33 pm Post subject: Help! Problem Student! |
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Guys, I really need your help.
I have a 10-11 yr old boy in one of my classes. The class size is 4. He is a challenge. He tries to be a class clown by misbehaving in the class. He doesn't listen to anyone when he is told to stop (native teacher or Japanese staff). He doesn't pay attention in class, he doesn't speak in a proper way ON purpose. He doesn't sit properly, he'd be rocking his chair & sticking his legs up (I have to tell him to sit nicely every 5 sec but he won't listen). He distracts other students by singing stupid songs really loud, or mimic stupid lines from comedians...except he does them as if it's skipping tracks, he'd repeat the same lines over & over again through the whole class. He doesn't try to understand the materials either, just talks in Japanese non-stop.
He'd come in class not having his hwk done. Thus the entire class gets a 0 for class competition point. I make it a big thing infront of other students & we all go "ah-ahh!" to him & blames him for not getting the point. He just gives us the stoned & I-don't-care look.
The Japanese staff is not helping at all. They just go "oh...he's like that...too bad." I really don't know what to do with him. They don't even come in to help when I ask them to!
The head teacher told me that he's acting this way cuz he's been at this school forever & so he just stopped wanting to learn or think. He used to be smart but since last year, he just stopped thinking.
I tried to talk to him in a nice way - didn't work. I then tried to talk to him in an authoritive, scolding & loud & not happy way - didn't work either. He just gives me the "haha, I'm not listening to you!" look, & it's p*ssing me off.
He doesn't wanna be here either. His mom made him come.
He is disturbing my class TOO much. Not only to the teacher but other students who all wants to learn. None of the other students like him. I had a student who kept telling him to shut-up (in English) more than a dozen time in class. He doesn't listen. I tried kicking him out of my class but he doesn't leave the room. I'd go "Good bye" to him, & he says "See you next time!" & laughs but stays. He is behind & I really want to help him, but only if he wants other ppl to help him, which he doesn't. I really don't wanna use violence & pull his ear & drag him out of my room. But I'm afraid if he continues this way, eventually I'll explode & do that to him.
What should I do????  |
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Nismo
Joined: 27 Jul 2004
Posts: 520
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| Posted: Sat Nov 06, 2004 8:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Confront his parents the next opportunity you have and give them a pamphlet with the symptoms of Attention Deficit Disorder listed in it. |
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Glenski
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Posts: 12844
Location: Hokkaido, JAPAN
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| Posted: Sat Nov 06, 2004 9:55 pm Post subject: |
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I've had adult students disrupt classes, although not to such a degree, but to the point where I had to kick them out. It CAN be done. It sounds like your staff is not helpful at all, and that was also the situation I was in.
I finally resolved the matter by informing the staff that the student was so disruptive that they were going to lose money as the other students quit. I figured the staff just needed that student's money and that they might have been worried about their image if a student complained after being kicked out, but I made it clear that there were MORE students who had the potential to complain if we DIDN'T kick him out. The staff didn't do anything directly to help, but they gave me the leeway I needed. I ignored the student completely, made him sit apart from the other students, and on the rare occasion that he had anything to say (it was always off topic), I told him to be quiet unless he could actually take part in the lesson topic. It took a few months, but he soon left, and there was NO complaint from him or the others.
I know you have a kid, not an adult, so the situation is a bit different. You simply have to do 2 things.
1. Inform the staff that they will lose money and image if this continues. If you haven't done it already, go up the chain of command further until you find someone you haven't spoken to. Put the yen in their face.
2. Get the parents involved. Perhaps they are high ranking customers to the staff, but it doesn't matter. If they won't sit in on a class to observe, see if you can videotape a lesson to show them. If that isn't possible, have extensive notes and a translator (if necessary) when you sit down with them. Preferably, do this with the kid in the room. Describe his behavior and how it affects the class. Give him one last chance to shape up, and then tell the parents you are going to ask him to leave.
Until any of this happens, I suggest two devious things. One, have the other 3 kids sit apart from him, and conduct the lesson without him, even if he is in the same room. Ignore the little brat, and if he chooses to join in, move again. Two, without telling him, change the room number. |
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spidey
Joined: 29 Jun 2004
Posts: 382
Location: Web-slinging over Japan...
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| Posted: Sun Nov 07, 2004 12:20 am Post subject: |
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A difficult problem...but not impossible.
I would suggest a more positive approach. Obviously, punishment of any sort is ineffective.
In my experience, children exhibiting these kinds of character traits tend to be natural born leaders. I would suggest that you focus on this. As you said he was quite a good student until this year, how about making him your teaching assistant. By this I mean...give him some class resposibilties such as handing out worksheets, erasing and cleaning the white/blackboard, and even helping other students. The list goes on and on. Be creative. This approach has been very effective for me when faced with this situation.
Because of his natural tendency to go against authority you will always be fighting a losing battle. By giving him some duties he will probably become a great first mate. Nurture is ability to take charge and use it to YOUR advantage. This is a win/win situation for everyone involved.
Good luck
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Sheep-Goats
Joined: 16 Apr 2004
Posts: 527
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| Posted: Sun Nov 07, 2004 1:17 pm Post subject: |
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Take away his chair and don't give him any guidelines as to what he has to do to get it back -- apart from mentioning that he can get it back. (The rules in reality will vary -- at first you'll need to reward any kind of progress with the chair back, later he'll have to show real improvement to earn his reward.) You need make him uncomfortable and force him to think how he can get out of being uncomfortable. Also try standing near him, like, too near him, when he's misbehaving. Imagine a teacher looming next to you all the damn time.
It's important to remember that if a student doesn't care about learning or his grades, it is quite likely that he has a more developed understanding of learning or grading -- eg: they don't matter. This means that for a short term solution, explaining to him problems that he's creating along those lines for himself or others won't be helpful.
Your long term task will be to change this perception of his. Make a two month plan to begin to do so -- with one lesson or activity per week (or so) designed to show him the importance of learning in a competitive society that gives you your rewards based on what you can do. Spidey may be right about his being a natural leader, but then he may not be as well -- he might be a natural ascetic or hermit. But in any case he doesn't seem to understand that his work can have real rewards... |
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King Kong Bundy
Joined: 04 Oct 2004
Posts: 76
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| Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 4:50 am Post subject: |
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| Everyone has given good advice! I would try all the above, specially having a Japanese teacher talk to the parents. |
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Celeste
Joined: 17 Jan 2003
Posts: 814
Location: Fukuoka City, Japan
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| Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 12:08 pm Post subject: |
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Here is something froma favourite website of mine called www.behavioradvisor.com
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"I'm a teacher. Be nice to me or I'll mess with your head!"
(An imposing threat, but let's try some other things first. Take a look below for explanations and strategies.)
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I don't give a sh----!
That's difficult for a teacher to hear. How could youngsters who started out out in kindergarten with such enthusiasm about learning, have fallen to such depths? On this web site bulletin board, in my classes, and at my workshops I've heard comments like this one: "I've tried everything. This kid just doesn't care about anything - - - grades, success, penalties, NOTHING!" These kids can be among the most frustrating for us serve. We, as lifelong learners and lovers of knowledge just can't comprehend why someone wouldn't want to get smarter. There are a number of reasons why kids give up in school. Many of them are listed below in brownish ink.
Essentially, there are two major reasons for lack of motivation:
1. Fear of failure and/or feelings of inadequacy
2. Believing that schooling is unrelated to their lives and/or dislike of the school
To determine the particular reason for a student's lack of enthusiasm, look at the links on the home page titled "Figuring out why kids misbehave" and "Functional Behavior Assessment". Once you know the reason, then you can devise a solution. You'll also want to check out "The Circle of Courage" (click here) model that helps to assess why a youngster might not be motivated, and how to intervene.
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They Fear Failure
No one wants to appear inadequate around others...especially when those others might judge us or ridicule our inferior performance. Kids who experience difficulties in learning or do not have the background knowledge to do well in your class may engage in "defensive behaviors" to avoid submitting work or offering commentary that might reflect poorly upon them. In their minds "It's better to be bad than dumb." For pre-adolescents and teenagers, being "bad" might even bring them admiration from peers! There are a number of ways that we can encourage involvement on the part of "unmotivated" students who fear failure:
Decrease the focus on individual grades
Fearing a poor grade and possible ridicule by others, students may refuse to work in order to protect their frail self concept (with regard to academics). If we place the focus on effort, not grades, any youngster can be a success. The fear of failing evaporates (although it may take a week or two to convince the youngster that academic judgment is no longer an issue), and participation increases.
Create an accepting and supportive atmosphere
Create a classroom environment in which it is OK to make mistakes, and where other students are encouraged to support others, not belittle them. Teachers don't just say "No, wrong answer" or correct student contributions that are incorrect. Errors are used to teach, not just evaluate. In the words of Bernard M. Baruch: "I have found that failure is a far better teacher than success." I'm sure that he meant "learning from failure".
Self evaluation of effort
When the youngster submits a product/paper/assignment to you, ask: "Did you give it your best effort?" If the youngster says "Yes", then we say "Thanks for trying so hard." If youngsters are trying as hard as they are able, then we should be happy teachers! Kids who put forth strong effort naturally learn and do better. Effort will result in the attainment of more facts, knowledge, and abilities...our goal as educators. Follow up on your recognition of effort by asking the youngster what he did well (or better than before) and what he needs to do to make the product even better. Then have the student revise the paper.
But what about grades???!!!! Why bother worrying about them? Your unmotivated student was probably receiving failing grades anyway, and isn't it our job as teachers to get information inside kids' noggins, not just to evaluate performance?
We continue to encourage the youngsters and catch them being good (be sure to read the links on the home page about "Problems with catching kids being good...and how to do it right" so that we don't destroy motivation while attempt to build it).
If a youngster reports that s/he did not give his/her best effort, ask "What prevented you from putting forth your best effort?" and provide assistance/support.
Use cooperative learning groups
When we structure assignments and activities so that kids can make at least minimal contributions to a project and share whatever knowledge and abilities they possess, we become mentors and facilitators of learning, not just lecturers. The pressure on students to perform perfectly, and fear of individual judgment are both lessened when kids cooperate to produce a product. To be sure that every student in the group participates actively, assign roles and duties. You can find out more about implementing cooperative learning practices by clicking on the link on the home page titled "Cooperative learning".
Offer Help
In private time with the youngster, say: "I know that no one wants to fail. You are. You shouldn't be. What would you need to be motivated to try? What can we do to get you excited about trying again.
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They Don't View School As Being Pertinent to Their Present or Future Lives
I personally don't study the digestive systems of ants because I don't see it's usefulness in living my life. Kids too can "shut down" on learning about subject matter when they don't see the relevance of the information being presented. When kids say "Why do we have to know this stuff?" we ought to be able to point out how it will help them in their lives (present or future). We should have a better answer than "You gotta learn this material so that you can learn the material I'm going to teach you next week." To this day, I cannot figure out how being able to divide fractions is useful to me (when you cut a recipe, you are really multiplying fractions, not dividing them...so that example isn't valid).
Educate them
Tell the students why the material is important
...and not just "Because it's on the test." At the beginning of the lesson, before you teach even a smidgen of information, tell them what they are going to learn and why it is so important for them to know it. Whenever possible, use examples that are present in their daily lives. Forget the example in the math book about Jennifer and Todd going to the supermarket to buy bananas and apples. Place the same functions in an example in which Wei Chu and Kong Ting go to the market place to buy eel, bok choi, and ginger root. Or use the example of Juanita and Julio going to the bodega (corner store) to purchase red beans, rice and plantains. Whatever the background and experiences of your kids, use it when first teaching new material (have you walked around their neighborhood to see what their daily lives encompass?). Once they gain an understanding of the material, then we can move to more abstract examples.
Have them determine why schooling is important
Find some private time to meet with the youngster. In a respectful, concerned manner (talking TO, not AT him/her) ask: "What job/career can you envision yourself doing when you're older?" (If the youngster doesn't know, make an appointment for him/her to see the guidance counselor to take a vocational skills and interests survey in order to identify possible occupations for which the youngster might be qualified or might enjoy.) Then ask "What do you think you need to know to be successful at that career?" (you're thinking about how your subject matter might be important here). In fact, ask: "Can you think of any career in this world where it is better to be uneducated than educated?" (I can't think of one.) They may mention professions that require a great voice, a strong body, quick reflexes, bravery, etc., but then say "Yes, but is that person better off being dumb or smart?". Even if they do come up with something, you can ask "Do you want the job?" (probably not) The next step in the conversation would be to ask why teachers like to have an orderly and civilized classroom (It's not just for us, but also for the benefit of THEM and society).
You also might ask if the behavior that was displayed will help him/her to be successful in life. If s/he says "Yes", ask how so. If the youngster plans on living the life of a criminal or street thug, discuss how s/he will be better at that undesirable life style with knowledge and information to triumph over others in arguments, obtain the affections of another, etc. (Don't worry about creating a better criminal. We obviously don't want kids to enter or remain in this life style, but if we can convince them to learn, they are more likely to avoid/escape it.)
Another approach is to say: "What will you do when you're older?" Obtain an answer about the chosen profession/job. Then have the student investigate that position (e.g., surfing the web, reading professional books and job announcements for that profession, interviewing those who are employed in that profession) to determine what must be learned in school to be successful at the chosen career.
Other approaches are also possible depending on the age and interests of the student. We might talk about how humor becomes funnier and wittier when more advanced wording is used, how being knowledgeable impresses the opposite sex, how someday his/her children will think their daddy/mommy is so smart and thus be very proud of them, etc. In fact, ask if s/he can think of any plausible situation in this world in which it is better to be under-informed and mal-educated.
Help students connect with the school
Our greatest psychological need in life is to "belong"...to be accepted and valued by others, and to be given increasing responsibility within our "tribe". Pre-adolescents and adolescents will do just about anything to gain and/or maintain the acceptance of the peer group. Those who are at-risk for embarrassment in front of the group, or damage to their self concept will do what is necessary to protect that social or personal image. If the youngster feels separated from peers or the school, resentment, retreat, rebellion, or retaliation can be expected. Students will not put forth their best effort for teachers who point out their shortcomings (do you put out your best efforts for those who berate your performance or treat you poorly?).
Bring the golden rule to class. Treat all youngsters with respect at all times. As Mark Twain said: "I am a fool, but I am God's fool, and all God's work must be contemplated with respect." In the words of some of my former students: "God don't make trash." (Although if he doesn't make mistakes, I sometimes wonder if he has some bad days or was working working with a hangover. I would sometimes think of Nathan Hale, an American Revolutionary War hero, and modify his words somewhat: "I regret that I have but one life to give for my country...but let it be James in the second row.") Take the time to form a relationship with the youngster. Kids who like and respect their teachers are more likely to work for them. Give youngsters the time of day. Find out about their lives and interests. Develop a sense of community in your classroom. Promote teamwork and esprit de corp. Arrange for special efforts to be made to include alienated and unpopular kids in the activities and governance of the school (e.g., clubs, conflict resolution mediators, student council representatives, peer tutors, helper to younger kids, etc.).
Defend our schools
Tell the youngster (respectfully) that "For centuries and all over the world, societies have set up schools. They realized the importance of educating their young so that when the kids grew up, they would know how to be successful. In our country, experts have gotten together to decide what's really important for our citizens to know. That's what we teachers teach. Kids all over the nation who are your age are learning the same thing. Now here's my concern: wise people for a thousand years have seen the need for education...and those people were kids who grew up and said 'Yep, our parents and teachers were right...we need to educate our children.'. Then their kids grew up and said the same thing. Then their kids! Now you, at age __, have decided that school isn't valuable. Do you think you're really in a position in life right now to know that? Think about those millions of people who for thousands of years have said: 'We care about our kids so much that we want to be sure they are ready to become intelligent citizens who can get a good job and raise good kids.' I really want you to question your decision to be a failure in life. Our world needs you too much to lose you. What do you think?"
Talk about their future
State/Ask the following: "Your grades and what you know will determine what you will do for a living. It will determine how much money you make, what nice things you can buy, and where you will live. It will determine who you work with on your job. Do you want to work with the best and brightest, or do you want to serve them?...Do you want to be their peer or their gopher? Right now, you're going to live in a shabby house, drive a banged up old car, and hang out with others who are underemployed...all because they didn't think ahead. You've still got a chance to make your future better. I hope you'll take this chance to be able to do nice things for your grandchildren who will be able to be proud of their granddad/mom has accomplished in his/her life."
Bond with them
State the following: "I wanted to check in with you right now because I want to see you become a success in life. Right now you're making a decision to have a lousy adult life. So I just want to be sure that when you have no money, an old beat up car spewing out oil and smoke, and a run down apartment, you'll think back to this day and say that it was your fault, not mine. However, if you ever do decide to have a good life, I'm here to help you."
Use surprise to get their attention (but then become supportive quickly)
(In a loud voice, say:) SLAM! (Then in an excited, but lower volume voice, say:)Did you hear that? You know what that was? (Now in your usual voice, say:) Another career door just closed on you, because you didn't try to learn something that is necessary for certain jobs. Each and every time you're not doing your very best, job opportunities close on you. The only way to keep the remaining doors open is to start applying yourself to your academics, and improving your ability to get along with your supervisiors...like me. The more doors that close on you, the less happy and wealthy you'll be, the less desireable you'll be to ladies/guys, and the lousier your life in general will be. I'd like to help you keep those remaining doors open...and maybe even kick in a few of those ones that closed on you. I'm always here whenever you decide to turn things around.
(use this approach as a way to convince the student to re-engage. Don't use it as a condescending put-down.)
Appeal to their patriotism
State the following: "You saw what those terrorists did to our country/the USA. If our country is going to survive, we need well educated citizens who can make us strong. We need you to apply yourself so that someday you've got the brains to become part of a group that tracks these nutzoids down, or just contributes to our government or economy so that we can continue to have a place that values freedom. We need you." (I can guess that some folks won't like this one. I happen to feel that it is honest and correct.)
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Important Questions to Consider
Do you know your student's instructional level (if they were motivated to show it)? Are you able to identify this student's learning preferences (hands-on, video, etc.) and learning style (auditory, visual, global, inductive, etc) so that you can teach to his/her strengths? If not, what will you do to seek out this information? |
Another bit of advice from the same site:
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Why Do People Defy Directions?
1. Transitional phases of human development
-Ages 2-3 Hey, it's your fault. You taught them the NO word. Now they're using it to test their environment and try to maintain their prestigious place in the world. Think about it...you're the king/queen of the world...everyone jumps through hoops for you until that dreaded moment...the start of toilet training. Previous to that time, you pretty much got to do things the way you wanted, when you wanted. Now society places it's first demands on you. There is a time and place for something. As the eminent Dr. Freud might describe it: The superego (society's rights and wrongs) is imposed on your id (the part of you that is impulsive and self-centered). Kids resist this restriction on their free world. We see defiance in an attempt to keep the known world the way it was.
(Side note: Most of us no longer hold a grudge against our parents for imposing restrictions during toilet training. In fact, I often thank my parents...toilet training has really come in handy for me over the years!)
-Adolescence I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't know here. With emerging new mental and physical abilities, pre-teens and teens want to have a say in their world. They want to influence what happens and have their opinions considered. This desire, mixed with a lack of life experience, and a not-yet-fully-developed frontal lobe (the part of the brain that helps us to recognize danger and fully feel empathy for others), often results in them wanting a longer leash than parents and educators feel it is wise to give.
-Senior years Imagine that your once strong body and nimble mind now start to fail you. You're much valued independence is something that you see fading. You must rely on others for things that you once did capably on your own. There is resentful at one's failing capacities. Many voice that "I don't want to be treated like a child!" (What does that statement say about our society if we don't want to be treated like kids?)
-Newly married? It's not unusual for newly weds to exhibit defiance as they adjust to a new state of being. It's difficult to adjust to a lifestyle in which independent decision-making is sometimes viewed negatively by the spouse. How many of us felt that the other person was placing "unreasonable" demands upon us. (I love you...now change.)
2. Defense of assigned personal image
Many children has been assigned identities by the important adults in their lives. They have been called "bad", "not very bright", "rude", etc. Imagine it, you hear someone who is in charge of raising you and has lived in this world much longer than you. They are all-knowing beings. If they say that you are something, then you accept that they are right. You adopt that identity. What do rude people do?...RUDE THINGS! We have created the very type of person we were trying to prevent! NEVER, NEVER, NEVER say that a child IS a particular type of person. You can say that the behavior is rude or that the action was thoughtless, but never say that the kid is rude or thoughtless (or some other negative identity tag). See the link on this site titled "Nice ways to build self discipline in kids" for more information and strategies regarding this advice.
INTERVENTIONS: (Ways to get our messages imbedded in the youngster's mind, and improve our connection with the student so that we are more likely to have our requests followed)
-Avoid using positive labels (e.g., "You're so smart.", "You're a good boy.") because they will be rejected by a youngster who sees them as being incorrect (given his/her life experience). So what do we do in place of labels? How do we break down old image (and build a new one)? Disprove the image (and build a new one) with non-disputable evidence and point out factual evidence of good choice making.
-"Thanks for holding the door for us. That was a kind gesture on your part."
-"Your patience with Ivan really helped him to understand the material. Thanks."
-"You showed a lot of restraint & self control in that situation. Proud of self."
-"Wow. You got it! Tell me how you figured it out."
-Set up the youngster for success So if your eyes are pealed and he's not showing pro-social behavior? What do you do? Arrange opportunities for the student to do well. Set him/her up for success, and then recognize the good choice.
-Reminisce If a potentially frustrating event for the student is about to occur, you can remind the youngster about times when the s/he made a good choice (perhaps times when you rigged the situation for success) and state your belief in his/her ability to make a good choice in this particular situation that is about to happen.
When I was a kid, I remember overhearing people saying positive things about me. I know now that my parents waited for me to walk by a conversation they were having with others at which time they would utter a compliment about me ("Other other boys were going to go swimming in the rapids today, but Tom remembered that it wasn't safe and told them.) Did this happen to you too? Devise opportunities to say positive things about how one of your students followed the directions or made a good choice. Be sure to state the actions that occurred. Do not label the student.
-Model values and behaviors you'd like the kids to adopt Are you on time for class? Do you treat others with respect? Your kids are watching. You are a role model.
-Interpret the behavior by placing the unknown or scattered feelings into perspective. Use "symptom estrangement" (Fritz Redl's term for separating the inappropriate behavior from the youngster...in other words "I hate the behavior, but I believe in your ability to change for the better.") Here's an example:
-"Lee, you're a kid with a lot of potential, but this behavior isn't helping your popularity with
others. I suspect that the reason you did it is because you were feeling victimized. We
need to learn better ways to handle these types of situations."
(Symptom Estrangement: Dislike the behavior while expressing belief in the kid's ability to change for the better.)
-"It's a hard for you to hear people say nice things about yourself, isn't it?"
Kid: "Don't nobody mean it when they say it."
-"It's hard for you to believe that people can care about you, huh?"
Kid: "Ain't nobody cares about me."
-"Are you saying that because you don't trust that I'm telling you the truth?"
Kid: "Hey, I've heard it all before."
-"You've experienced a lot of failure in your young life, but that doesn't mean that you're
a failure. I see your potential, and I'm here to help you reach it. There's still time."
Kid: "BUG OFF. Leave me alone."
-Below that superficial rejection, which was an automatic response on the kids part, is a thought that perhaps someone does care about his/her welfare. You've make a small pinhole in the dark cover over his/her psyche.
-Prepare the student for your positive feedback (In order to prevents the automatic negative reactions found above)
-"I have something nice I'd like to tell you. Wanna hear it?"
Kid: "NOPE." (but s/he is wondering what you were going to say)
-"I'd like give you compliment. How're you gonna react if I do?"
Kid: "Not well."
Teacher: "That's OK... I'll take my chances."
-Make a quick retreat Provide praise in written form (or make a very quick verbal commentary) and walk away.
In this way, there is no chance for the student to give you an automatic nasty retort.
3. Defiance due to Conflict Between The Student and Educators
If your student is known to be "rude", "defiant", or "oppositional", s/he probably has a long history of negative experiences with authority figures. You belong to a group of people who have made his/her life miserable and said nasty things to him/her. Then s/he meets a nice person like you, but immediately categorizes you as being "one of them". Expecting the rejection s/he has experienced before from teachers who initially said "I care about you and we'll have a good year.", but then became enemies in the behavior battle, s/he strikes out at you.
Defiant kids will try to force you into that "mean teacher" role to keep their concept of the world intact. It's a coping strategy: They are trying to manage a negative and unpredictable life. They are trying to protect their injured self from further harm. They want to get the "inevitable" rejection over quickly and on their terms. They decide to reject you before you reject them. Will try to prove that you are like the others to keep world view intact (however distorted). Will do things to make you take off behavior management halo and pick up disciplinary pitch fork.
Will you be able to keep your caring approach when this student challenges you? Will you be able to avoid taking these comments and actions personally? Will you be able to stand back and say "Here is a child in crisis (again). What should a caring professional such as myself do in this situation? What reaction on my part is ethical, moral, professional, and in the youngster's best interests?"
The idea that I'm trying to convey is that educators often create the very behavior that they complain about. Many times oppositional behavior results from getting tired of hearing corrections, chastisement, complaints and other negative comments about oneself all the time. At some point, kids get fed up and tell negative people to "take a hike" (or some other wording). If we are going to change the defiant behavior, we must set kids up for success, catch them being good when they do succeed, and focus on progress, however small. Changing these kids to be more cooperative is a series of small victories (in which both sides win and feel good). If you're a bossy teacher, don't expect to make much progress with these kids.
Often times, if we are to break a student's negative behavior pattern, we must break our own "dark side" ways first. Many of us hold the view that we are the masters and the students are our slaves...that we are the hammer and the students are the anvil (I would remind you that the hammer wears out long before the anvil). Pupils are expected to obey our every direction without question. Certainly that form of compliance would be nice, but does it teach our youngsters to think, reason, develop self-regulation of behavior, and become thoughtful citizens? (The answer is "no")
As students get older, they want to contribute to the environment in which they find themselves. They want to influence the events in their community (the classroom and school). They also want more responsibility within that arena, and respect for their views. Certainly we teachers (in general) have more experience and wisdom than our youngsters, but part of being a wise elder is helping the younger generations to develop into thoughtful societal contributors, not automatons who robotically follow commands (except in emergency situations). Refrain from escalating a minor incident into a major battle. Talk privately, NEVER in front of others. Avoid bringing up past failures and infractions.
Youngsters who feel that they have no control over a situation will fight for control. Often, they are able to disrupt our classes, gain the support of others, and be viewed as a champion for student rights. Many "oppositional" young people, perhaps due to life circumstances or familial/cultural upbringing (more on this topic in the future) may be more sensitive to being "ordered" to engage in actions (e.g., starting work, completing work in a certain prescribed manner, ceasing behavior deemed inappropriate).
INTERVENTIONS
-Recognize the "wounded animal" that doesn't trust and is trying to prevent deeper hurt. This child is afraid, but showing you other behaviors to disguise that fear. If we could just place ourselves in their shoes...we would look funny and our feet would hurt...but let your empathy for others who are hurt win out over caustic reactions.
-Avoid coercive "Do it dammit!" directions. Use requests and the word "Please" before politely stated directions.
-Avoid toxic penalties. When we engage in behavior battles with kids, we are at risk for coming to view them as the enemy. Then we decide to "get tough with them to teach them a lesson". Odd...we don't learn lessons that way and would refuse to do what others want us to do (or at least resent them)...but somehow we think that everyone else will learn a lesson is we "get tough with 'em".
-Use "Symptom Estrangement" (see above).
-Don't take it personally. The behavior is part of the student's disability. Let these oppositional things bounce off of you.
-Never give up on a youngster. Keep believing in their ability to change for the better...now that s/he has a persistent, and caring teacher like you.
4. Fear of failure upon seeing teacher's assignments
Imagine that you are in a group of peers. You are presented with a task that you know you are not able to do well. You are afraid of being publicly exposed as not being able to accomplish what others can do. You have a choice: You can be "bad" or "dumb". Which one would you choose? Certainly, the "bad" badge has more prestige to it than the "dumb" label. Many of our kids will choose the former when faced with failure.
Are you sure that the material is on your student's level? Could your student be avoiding imminent failure? Do you know your students' instructional levels (if they were motivated to show it)? Are you able to identify this student's learning preferences (hands-on, video, etc.) and learning style (auditory, visual, global, inductive, etc.) so that you can teach to his/her strengths? If not, what will you do to seek out this information?
INTERVENTIONS
-Modify assignments so that reading/writing level do not come into play. See web sites like www.LDonline.com for ideas on how to modify assignments so that kids can show their knowledge without limited skills getting in the way.
-Focus on effort, not accuracy. If kids are trying their best, we should be happy teachers! With effort will come accuracy and acquisition of knowledge. Promote "best effort" over grades and scores. You'll find that exactness will increase over time if kids don't fear grades. Can't focus solely on effort due to the school's requirement that you must submit grades? Could you build effort into the academic grade (sort of like a daily quiz)? Kids will learn more if they're engaged in the task.
-Get them started first with some help and support.
-Break down the task into sections and have each part checked before next part.
-Offer options for completion. Provide acceptable ways (to you) for showing one's knowledge.
-Have the student place his/her answers/thoughts onto audio tape. Then score those answers for content. Use written work as an exercise to improve that particular skill. In other words, separate the information from the skill that gets in the way of showing one's knowledge.
-Implement cooperative learning, peer tutoring, and/or cross-age tutoring (see the link on this site titled "cooperative learning")
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OTHER GENERAL STRATEGIES TO USE
WITH
KIDS WHO DISPLAY DEFIANCE
The Event That Never Happens
Prevent and Analyze
Be proactive. Based upon past experience and analysis of the youngster's behavior, predict situations in which the behavior might arise and attempt to prevent it's occurrence. Become skilled at identifying the goal or function of the student's behavior (see the links on the home page titled "Figuring out why kids misbehave..." and "Functional Behavior Assessment").
Defusing Refusing
Say it nicely
We all like to be shown respect by others. If "non-compliant", "defiant", and "oppositional" kids feel that their view point has been considered or that they have been "asked" rather than "told" to do something, they are more likely to comply. Consider your own life: How would you prefer that bosses, spouses, elder siblings, parents, principals, and professors gain your cooperation? Don't you respond better to a friendly, supportive supervisor?
You can find tips on saying it nicely in the following links on our home page:
-Nice things to try (before using "do it or else" interventions)
-Gaining and getting respect
-I messages
If these strategies fail, you can always follow them with the usual coercive interventions. If the less intrusive strategies don't work initially, don't give up. Keep using them before implementing penalties. Kids will, over time, notice the progression of events and recognize the benefits of responding to your earlier, gentler attempts to gain their cooperation.
Offer a selection of choices that are acceptable to you
"Non-compliant" pupils wish to have some degree of influence or control in a situation. They rebel against adults who they view as being oppressive. Instead of demanding that the work be completed in a prescribed manner, give the youngster "power" in a situation while still getting what you want (displaying knowledge). Just provide the youngster with a choice of several ways of completing the assignment.
Suppose you want Jasmine to write in her daily journal, but she refuses. You might offer her the following options which you deem acceptable:
-write in pencil instead of pen
-use a green ink pen
-use a felt tip pen
-compose the essay on a computer, print it out, and paste it in the journal
-draw a picture of what she would otherwise write about (ask for a caption and short summary later)
A picture???!!!! How can I suggest such a thing??!! OK, then don't offer that option. However, please consider that a picture represents her story, and if she's going to rebel against your demand to write in blue ink, you're not going to get anything from her when she rebels (and the argument will ruin your day, irritate the principal when you send Jasmine to the office, and upset the other kids). Isn't the submission of something better than nothing at all (at least as a start)? Once you have her product, thank her for submitting it, find something to compliment, and encourage further compliance. Perhaps after some positive commentary, you can say "Now I realize what you're capable of doing. I know I'm going to see more of this super work in the future. Right?" Or compliment the product and try to get a bit more out of the youngster right then ("This is a well drawn and realistic rendering. Would you mind writing a caption to it so that we know what it's about?" OR "This essay is very strong in content and your penmanship (is this a sexist term?) and writing mechanics are excellent. You know what would really distinguish this piece from ordinary ones?... More colorful and vivid words that enhance your images. Remember our lesson on adjectives? Can you fit in 3 or 4 descriptive words for your nouns? Don't worry about writing your piece over again, just write the adjectives above where you want them to go. I'll know where they belong.")
Another example: "Josh, you're on the cleanup crew today. Do you want to be the gum scraper, paper picker upper, broom pusher, dust pan holder, or mopper? Graffiti remover? Oh...thanks for reminding me of that. What's your plan for removing it? ("Paint over it.") That will certainly get that scribbling out of our site, but then we still have a messy wall. Would you like to use soap and water or spray chemicals and a rag? ("Spray chemicals.") OK, but you realize that you'll have to wear goggles and rubber gloves, before you use the spray bottle right? (OK)"
Allow the student to self-monitor and self-evaluate
Allowing the student to evaluate his or her own work gives "power". You might provide a checklist to be completed, or ask the student to list the strong and weak points of his/her academic product. For behavior in general, visit our link on "self monitoring". This procedure involves the student in his/her own behavior change for the better.
Send a note
Notes are a great way to prevent misbehavior, nip it in the bud, or address issues. The permanent and novel (at least between teachers and kids) form of communication often makes a more dramatic impact upon the behavior and emotional state of our students. Below, you'll find examples of different types of notes. Just remember though: watch the wording (remember that this note might be shown to others) and be aware that it is more difficult to convey emotion in writing...add a smiley face to the note (or to your face as you deliver the document).
Pre-emptive/Preventive Notes (Present these to the student(s) before the activity/event)
"Svetlana, remember to raise you hand to offer an answer or comment."
"Group 2: Bring your discussion to a close soon. Have your projects put away by 2:10pm."
After-The-Fact (Present these to address a behavior/event after it has occurred)
"Chandra, please see me at your convenience, but before the bell rings."
"I was saddened to hear of your family's loss. If you want to talk, I'm available."
"T.J.: Insightful answers in class today. Thanks for contributing."
"Shoshana, thanks for helping me yesterday. It's greatly appreciated.
"Calvin, I let your rude remarks pass today. Just don't let it happen again tomorrow."
Humorous Reminders (To address issues that need resolution now...or in a couple of minutes)
Dear Willie: Please stop using invisible ink.
Your ledger.
Dear Josie: I get lonely without words.
Your notebook.
Dear Ali: I can't think straight. I need my mind organized.
Your locker.
"Offers Of Assistance"
Here's a typical scenario: The teacher says "Hector, open your book to page 14 and answer the questions please." Hector says "I ain't opening no stupid book. This is baby crap." Hector is sending a false message to his peers...He's too bright for this material and rejects you for asking him to do the assignment. The true message is that the material is much to difficult for him. He knows that it is better to be "bad" than "dumb". Here's how to use notes to gain cooperation...
If you detect that the youngster needs assistance:
-Continue to teach the lesson while moving slowly toward the student.
-As you teach, write on a "post it" (sticky back) "Do you want help?" (Be sure to use the word "want"...he can't admit that he "needs" help)
-Keep walking, but look back to the youngster in a couple of seconds
-Wait for a cue from him/her as to "Yes" or "No"
-If "Yes", write another note: "From me or another student?"
-Watch for a non-verbal reply (e.g., nod of head, pointing to someone)
"Offers of assistance don't force kids to reveal that they need help and give "personal space" to oppositional kids while being supportive.
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Eleckid
Joined: 03 Jun 2004
Posts: 102
Location: Aichi, Japan
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| Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 1:27 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for all the wonderful advices! I found out that it also helped another teacher who's currently having the same problem.
I will ask my boss to get the kid's mom to sit in this class. I think my boss had told the mom the kid's problem since last yr, but maybe the mom either doesn't believe my boss or the boy is acting exactly the same at home (mom can't control him). Anyway, the mom sit in is a great idea, hope the mom will cooperate. If not, then I will set a time to talk to the kid in private after the lesson with the Japanese staff helping me translate.
Even after I've read that article from the prev poster, I still sorta can't find out what exactly is wrong with this kid. I've only taught this class for 4 times, so maybe I need more time to discover & get to know this kid a bit more to understand his real reason for stop thinking. I'm guessing that he got bored of English & (as the article stated) that he couldn't find English useful for his life outside the classroom. I will also talk to the teacher who taught him last term.
This kid is not that stupid (but is now behind due to the lack of care for 1 yr). He doesn't seem to want to do anything (very thing is "mendoksai" to him, the way he speaks is lazy too! "Yada. Mendok."). He seem to not have much patient either (ex. when he was having a little trouble doing his halloween craft, he just threw the unfinished craft, saying "Mou, yada!"). His writing (in Eng or J) are both extremely messy. Maybe he does have ADSD, he is showing some of its symptoms.
How can I explain to this 10-11yr old boy that what he's learning is important? |
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BradS
Joined: 05 Sep 2004
Posts: 173
Location: Tokyo, Japan
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| Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2004 12:10 pm Post subject: |
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Just my 2 cents:
1) Challenge him. Kids who are "trouble students" most likely already know what you're teaching challenge him or suggest that he be moved up a class.
2) Stand him in a corner of the classroom while the other students do activities. A lot of students in Japan misbehave because Japanese teachers don't practice "time out". Do it. Standing in the corner hasn't failed me yet. 
3) Take out his report card and mark it in front of him (giving him fails).
4) Maybe your classes are boring (just wondering). Get them out of their chairs and do something active.
Hope this helps. |
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bshabu
Joined: 03 Apr 2003
Posts: 200
Location: Kumagaya
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| Posted: Wed Nov 10, 2004 1:03 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
1) Challenge him. Kids who are "trouble students" most likely already know what you're teaching challenge him or suggest that he be moved up a class.
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I have to agree with BradS. I have the same problem with a 3rd grader. He has had great success in driving my up the wall. However, he is a bright boy. I think he could be the smartest in the class. He can do the word puzzles in record time. He loves doing them and tries to finish it before everone else. |
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