Job Discussion Forums

[biffinbridge]

Don't throw old corks away.Whenever you find an old cork attach it to a piece of string.Next, attach the afore mentioned piece of string to a pencil and hey presto you have a 'fly chaser'.Instead of cruelly swatting flies with a swatter and getting bad karma, you can chase them out of the room by waving the 'chaser' wildly and yelling at the top of your voice behind them. Flies will then leave your room in a state of bewilderment and never come back.Who said biff didn't have a heart?

[johnslat]

Dear biffinbridge,
" Who said biff didn't have a heart? "
The flies, perhaps? But then, who pays attention to anything they say?
Regards,
John

[R]

Don't throw old bricks away. When you find an old brick, tie it to a piece of string, and tie the other end to an old hockey stick. Hey presto... you have yourself a private student chaser. When you're bothered by private students who try to get a bit of free English conversation at the end of the lesson, rather than swatting them, simply spin the brick around your head and chase them out of your flat with it.

[R]

Don't throw old US presidents away. When you find an old American president, tie it to a piece of string, and tie the other end to an old Scud missle. Hey presto... you have yourself a rogue dictator chaser. When you're bothered by rogue dictators who try to control their oil and ethnically cleanse their own and nearby countries, rather than swatting them, simply spin the president around your head and chase them out of their country with it

[Shonai Ben]

A rogue dictator chaser.Is that like a flaming bush?Or a bush fire?

[richard ame]

Top tips indeed I think some of you are going stir crazy ,sitting in front of your screens all day sending all sorts through the net , any one here seen the League of Gentlemen courtsey of B.B.C. Prime I think I'm going to Royston Vasey for the summer who knows I may get some sembelance of normality there.