Job Discussion Forums

[ntropy]

In my part of Japan, the bonenkai's, office trips etc. were usually paid for out of a social fund taken from paycheques monthly. You paid whether you went or not. The first party was virtually obligatory but you were then allowed to escape if you wanted as it didn't go on all that long. Speeches, meals, and a few drinks. Those who wanted to drink more/stay longer then went on to a second party that was not at all obligatory and the next bill was divided up equally among those present. Not an unreasonable system in my estimation.

[Big John Stud]

Mike L. wrote:

I think being forced to attned a party you don't want to go to is completly absurd! But then again I'm not a company man either!

It not that I am being forced to go, but if I don't go everyone will think I don't like them. I actually do like everyone I work with but as stated above the parties always end up being eating a lot and drinking a lot. Besides I can not justify spending 8,000yen to eat out one night. There is just too many other things I could use the money to buy!

[Willy_In_Japan]

At my school, everyone puts in money every month. I don't know how much it is, because I dont, but whever I go to these enkai's, I am asked to pay 5000 yen.

They have one a month in my school, so it is getting to be a little much. I begged off last month, but of course politically, you MUST go to the Bonenkai in December.

5000 yen for Japanese food and drinks is steep in my mind. id rather have a steak dinner for less. I always get the feeling like 'sheesh, most of the days wage gone over this dinner' after I leave.

[angstrom]

bottom line is, in my mind, if you're going to throw a party, there should not be any money exchanging hands. I would even venture further and say that in Russia, people actually cry or feel horribly insulted if you merely offer money. I'm not looking for any free lunches and would even bring a gift more costly than what I've been asked to pay, so that value here is irrelevant. All I'm saying is, a party is a party and what it all boils down to is being with friends and having fun. No one in America would be caught dead going around with a collection box at the end of a party.

[guest of Japan]

If the parties being held require a full room or even a restaurant then the guilty party is the restaurant owner. I've been involved in party preparation quite a few times. Most restaurants charge a minimum of 4000 yen per person for a party.

If people don't want to pay then don't go. If you do go don't complain about the bill. Think how the poor young female Japanese women feel at these parties. Not only do they have to pay the same bill, but also they usually have to refrain from drinking heavily in front of their superiors and they have to cater to the every whilm of the older men present. They often have little time to eat anything either. Most Japanese people hate enkais for far more reasons than financial costs.

[Nismo]

[Celeste]

[Nismo]

I hear it used all the time. It was even the first thing my best friend's homestay said to him when we arrived at their house.

"ahh, chotto futotta!"

[Lynn]

[Big John Stud]

I couldn't say I am getting fat! I live in a small town so all I do during the week is working out and study. The other day a teacher asked me if I had stomach muscles because I am known to drink during the weekends. I showed her how all my stomach muscles show.

[zoubaidah]

This thread has just answered a question I had after being told I didn't have to pay to go to the end of year party. In New Zealand such parties were paid out of the schools' social club funds to which we'd contributed during the year - voluntarily - and non-members paid their own costs. In Thailand the schools paid for everything.
It sounds as if attendance is at such events is somewhat expected - would that apply to women, or just men? I'm not much of a party person and my idea of a good time ISN'T getting wasted.

Zee

[Big John Stud]

zoubaidah wrote:

This thread has just answered a question I had after being told I didn't have to pay to go to the end of year party. In New Zealand such parties were paid out of the schools' social club funds to which we'd contributed during the year - voluntarily - and non-members paid their own costs. In Thailand the schools paid for everything. It sounds as if attendance is at such events is somewhat expected - would that apply to women, or just men? I'm not much of a party person and my idea of a good time ISN'T getting wasted. Zee

Most likely if you don't go everyone will think you don't like them. At one school I worked at we had to go no choice. If we didn't go we still had to pay whatever the amount was to be.
The schools I presently work at we have a choice. One school I am not going to their end of the year party because everyone there treats me like a gaijin. The other school everyone is very kind so I will go to their party.

[Spinoza]

[spidey]

Yeah I see what you mean....however...

The school as a whole is a good place to work. Considering I would have to be in the same teacher's room with these people I figured a more subtle way of protesting was in order. The next day I let everyone one know of my displeasure from the night before. Most of the staff just shrugged their shoulders and said "that's just how it is." A common statement made here in Japan. I also said that I had lost a lot of respect for the people involved for the same reason..."that's just the way it is." That was about a year ago...and for the people involved it has long been water that has run under the bridge. But in my little book of "strikes", the school and the people in question definitely have 1 or 2 strikes against them. And I have become all the more wiser since.

S

[Nismo]