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Serious Question re:Abuse

 
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RobotTeacher



Joined: 16 Mar 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Inchon City, kinda

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 3:12 pm    Post subject: Serious Question re:Abuse Reply with quote

I know it's out of proper context (I can't seem to register for the Korean boards, though)

Okay...part of our routine is that students hand in diaries. The teachers read them over and correct where appropriate.

What am I supposed to do when I read

"I am sad because my mother beats me"

I'm kinda worried. I'm at less than a month into this job. Is this a common phrase to see crop up in Eastern Asia in general?

Sorry to bother you all, I just really want some input.
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Stephen Jones



Joined: 21 Feb 2003
Posts: 4124

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 3:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'd do a good job or she might just come along and beat you as well!
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RobotTeacher



Joined: 16 Mar 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Inchon City, kinda

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 3:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Stephen Jones wrote:
I'd do a good job or she might just come along and beat you as well!


You know....I ask a serious question, this is what I get?

*sighs*
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Stephen Jones



Joined: 21 Feb 2003
Posts: 4124

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 4:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well if you prefer the serious answer, it's none of your business, you're in somebody else's culture which you don't really understand, so stick to teachng English.
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dyak



Joined: 25 Jun 2003
Posts: 630

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 4:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's a difficult situation. Reading students' written work is almost like reading their diaries, and as teachers we do encourage them to write about personal things. I don't think you're in a position to do anything. Though if this student is reaching out, you are in a position to be supportive or to suggest he/she reach out to organisations that maybe can do something.
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darkside1



Joined: 16 Feb 2005
Posts: 86
Location: Glasgow, Scotland

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 4:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If you were in the UK I'd say:

1) show the diary to management
2) do not take the initiative in discussing allegations of abuse with the student, but listen if s/he wants to talk to you
3) keep your own written record with times/ dates and notes of what you heard/ saw
4) monitor the student in class for any other unusual behaviour (e.g. attention seeking) which could indicate something is wrong outside school.

However, Stephen Jones may be right. You are in another culture. What does 'beat' mean- a slap for being naughty? Are you working in a high school or a language school? Big difference: if it's the former there will be a pupil support network of some sort I'm guessing that would allow you to flag up this 'problem' (if it's real) to somebody trained to deal with it.

If the latter, unless the student's behaviour becomes seriously weird/ disruptive, I'd leave well alone. I would write a memo and perhaps show it to a senior teacher but in a low key way along the lines of you are unsure what it means in the local culture.
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RobotTeacher



Joined: 16 Mar 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Inchon City, kinda

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 4:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

darkside1 wrote:
If you were in the UK I'd say:

1) show the diary to management
2) do not take the initiative in discussing allegations of abuse with the student, but listen if s/he wants to talk to you
3) keep your own written record with times/ dates and notes of what you heard/ saw
4) monitor the student in class for any other unusual behaviour (e.g. attention seeking) which could indicate something is wrong outside school.

However, Stephen Jones may be right. You are in another culture. What does 'beat' mean- a slap for being naughty? Are you working in a high school or a language school? Big difference: if it's the former there will be a pupil support network of some sort I'm guessing that would allow you to flag up this 'problem' (if it's real) to somebody trained to deal with it.

If the latter, unless the student's behaviour becomes seriously weird/ disruptive, I'd leave well alone. I would write a memo and perhaps show it to a senior teacher but in a low key way along the lines of you are unsure what it means in the local culture.


Thanks, all.

Sorry...guess I worry a little too much over things. *shrugs* Just feel bad for the kid, y'know?
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valley_girl



Joined: 22 Sep 2004
Posts: 272
Location: Somewhere in Canada

PostPosted: Fri Mar 18, 2005 6:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Unfortunately, I must agree with the others who have already responded. There is nothing you can do and if anything, you will only serve to get yourself into some very hot water if you attempt to save this kid. Corporal punishment is a part of the Korean culture and it is not considered abuse. You are an outsider with wacky ideas about how they should raise their children. You cannot win.
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ls650



Joined: 10 May 2003
Posts: 3484
Location: British Columbia

PostPosted: Sat Mar 19, 2005 12:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It seems to me the best solution is to watch the situation. As others said, it may be a small slap, or it may be something much worse. Befriend the student and let him/her know that sooner or later things will be different. Maybe then you'll get more information and be in a better position to judge exactly what is going on...
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distiller



Joined: 31 May 2004
Posts: 249

PostPosted: Sat Mar 19, 2005 3:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

All you can really do is alert the school and then it is up to them to deal with it. You are right to be concerned for your kids' welfare, however, you are not a social worker and you are working from a translation. I've run into this before and it can mean anything from light spankings to full on abuse to misuse of vocabulary. This is why it needs to handled by the locals in the local language with staff trained in social work issues in their country. You can't make them do the right thing, all you can do is alert them, express your concern and regularly check up on the kid and the school's action on the case.

Don't mind the prats in here who think that abuse is somehow funny.
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SueH



Joined: 01 Feb 2003
Posts: 1022
Location: Northern Italy

PostPosted: Sat Mar 19, 2005 8:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

As somebody else has noted, don't ignore the linguistic element. I'm in the UK at the moment teaching ESOL. A few weeks ago the word 'beat' came up in a different context ['I beat her at tennis' or similar]. It took some time to explain, particularly to the chinese students. I also work at a young peoples' hostel - I'd be wary of what vulnerable and manipulative people tell you; particularly in a strange culture.
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Celeste



Joined: 17 Jan 2003
Posts: 814
Location: Fukuoka City, Japan

PostPosted: Sun Mar 20, 2005 5:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have worked in the public school system in Korea and Japan, and in both places, the drill is to inform the homeroom teacher. The homeroom teacher knows the kid best and can deal with the issue most effectively. If you are at a conversation school or cram school, you can only inform your boss. There are laws about child abuse in most of East Asia, but the laws only seem to be applied after someone dies.
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laura1d



Joined: 13 Jan 2005
Posts: 108
Location: Spain

PostPosted: Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi,

I had a 'similar' problem. I teach in Thailand and recently one of my students (a 12 year old girl) came to my class in tears (having been absent from school for the previous 3 days). She came to the front of the class holding her wrist. I didn't notice what she was doing and asked her what was wrong. She was very shy but showed me her arm. She had been self harming and her arm was bleeding quite badly. I left the class and took her to the school nurse. After class I spoke with her class 'counsellor' and flagged the problem. I was told that she was a 'liar' and that she told stories about her home life. As far as I know they did nothing more to help out. It is tough. I can't go against the culture here but am concerned for the kid.

All I do is make sure she knows she can talk to me and try to check up on her mental state when we are in class. Pathetically little but better than nothing...

Good luck to you. I suggest trying to tell some native speakers in your school and asking them to check it out.

Just 'cause cultures are different doesn't mean you shouldn't at least tell people in a position to help the student if needed.
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