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worlddiva · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 1:40 pm Post subject:

Well, I live in a smaller city so I can't speak for Tokyo but...

There aren't very many foreigners here so when I see one I haven't met I usually say hello or at the very least smile. The way I look at it, there is no harm in introducing yourself and if the feeling is reciprocated, great! if not, oh well...

I have only been in Japan for 3 months and one thing I have noticed is that foreigners that have been here for a while i.e. 2+ years don't really have much of an interest in meeting new foreigners as they already have an established network of friends.

To the original poster, I wouldn't take things too personally...if you say hi! and you see they aren't very responsive then forget it and move on. I lived in New York City for some time and I would think that Tokyo is kinda the same. People in large cities are too preoccupied with their own stuff to worry about what others are doing. Life is usually so fast paced that people don't really stop to say Hi! anymore...a shame I think. Although there will always be someone who will surprise you once in a while! My advice to you, treasure those moments and ignore the rest.

Hoser · Joined: 19 Mar 2005 Posts: 694 Location: Toronto, Canada

I'm glad someone actually brought this up because it's a question that's been playing on my mind lately. I've only been here a month but already I've been affected by it.
I must say it actually makes me a little uncomfortable to meet up with another gajin on the street. I look at them and ask myself, "Am I obligated to acknowledge this person just because he/she is white or speaks english?"
Usually in the end I just kind of avert my eyes and pretend I don't notice them. That may sound terribly anti-social and I admit that I AM a little, but if I met you walking down Yonge St I wouldn't say hi so why the hell should I have to do it here? Are we some kind of secret society or something? I feel like we're supposed to give each other some kind of salute.

Anyways that's my feelings on the subject. I hate to sound like an ass but it really bugs me that I feel guilty just for not talking to someone passing by on the street.

Rorschach · Joined: 25 Mar 2004 Posts: 130 Location: Osaka

I treat everyone equally on the street. They are all strangers regardless of origin. I'm not one to go out of my way to say hello to every gaijin I see in public unless I know them. A couple of times gaijin have tried to start a conversation with me on the train coming home from work. To be fair I am usually fairly gruff but I have just spent 8 hours speaking and teaching English and I just don't feel like talking on the way home. I feel I'm entitled to some space so I end the conversations fairly quickly. I can understand how some new teachers feel being in a country as unique and peculiar as Japan but you have to expect some defensiveness in a place where there is so little personal space.

Glenski · Joined: 15 Jan 2003 Posts: 12844 Location: Hokkaido, JAPAN

PAULH · Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Posts: 4672 Location: Western Japan

em_mcc · Joined: 30 Mar 2005 Posts: 5

and yet even those people who say they don't like to interact with other foreigners on the street make conversation with complete strangers on the net - just another example of the strange habits of our technological society I guess. Wink

king kakipi · Joined: 16 Feb 2004 Posts: 353 Location: Australia

Paul H wrote

PAULH · Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Posts: 4672 Location: Western Japan

moot point · Joined: 22 Feb 2005 Posts: 441

I went through a stage during my first years in Japan where I tried to avoid eye contact with other foreigners like the kind of reasoning mentioned above.

But one day I passed by a (foreign) guy on the beach who said "hello" while I walked passed him and didn't reply he laughed and said, "Ahh, you're another gaijin who are afraid to talk to gaijins". I turned around and said "hi" and he offerend me a beer. Since then we have become best of friends. He's now a professor of English at UCLA.

fox1 · Joined: 22 Feb 2005 Posts: 268

I'm just like, whatever.

i kinda smile and nod to some foreigners if they're walking right by me. if they wanna smile back, cool... if not, cool too. whatever.

no big deal.

plenty of people ignore me: kinda funny i think.

I'm new. We'll see how it goes!

SEndrigo · Joined: 28 Apr 2004 Posts: 437

I feel sorry for people who choose not to be polite to other foreigners....in my opinion, some foreigners really improve the quality of this place (not including the GIs, who are a disgrace to all foreigners).

Even though I live in Tokyo, 99 percent of the people I see are Japanese, so I really enjoy seeing foreigners and occasionally talking to them.

And the notion that we are "invading" their space is absurd...this is Japan, and we are all foreigners here. We may as well stick together cos that makes life better for everyone !

Marika · Joined: 17 Jun 2004 Posts: 32

I say hi to most people here. I'm friendly and outgoing so when I'm out walking its just a thing I do. I never see any of the Japanese people give me that same smug look some of the foreigners give me. I've started bursting out laughing cause it's so funny how some of them give you that...smug look on there face. Ahhhhhh get over it.
I find all people interesting especially when there of another culture. I adore culture.

tokyorabbit · Joined: 15 Feb 2004 Posts: 30 Location: Tokyo, Japan

Ok, I'm going to be the bad guy in this thread.

I hate when there are English speaking foreigners on the train that either 1.) Try to start a conversation with me. 2.) Talk very very loudly in English (because I can hear every word they say whether I like it or not).

Basically, when I am on the train at night, I just like to read my book and chill out after my day. I have never been rude to anybody, but I just like my quiet time in the evening. Part of the reason I have stayed in Japan is I like how people in Tokyo are polite and mind their own business on the train.

I would like to note that I have given plenty of foreigners here help, directions, even small amounts of yen if need be. But I still don't find much interesting about talking to other foreigners on the train. The only exception to this would be if another foreigner wanted to speak to me in Japanese (I speak English all day long as a job but I desperately need Japanese speaking practice).

Sweetsee · Joined: 11 Jun 2004 Posts: 2302 Location: ) is everything

Don't be bothered by smug, unfriendly or stuck-up foreigners. These are the ones who look the other way or try to ignore you. They lack positive energy.
Goodness begets goodness.

Sour Grape · Joined: 10 May 2005 Posts: 241

One thing I don't understand whenever this issue comes up is as follows. If a Japanese person wants to make idle conversation with a foreigner, he/she is often condemned as a language leech. But if another foreigner tries to start a conversation, it seems I am expected to welcome it.

Anyway, I'll try to help foreigners who seem to me to be lost, but I don't want strangers to greet me in the street for no other reason than us both being expats. Sweetsee and others can analyse that all they want.