Job Discussion Forums

[foster]

I can see where it would come off as racist, but on the other hand, these are our observations and in some cases experiences. I think it is rather unfair to accuse of of racism when we are simply telling what happened to us and what we have been through.

No, not all western men change...and by discussing them in this light, we could be considered racist against all western men as well if that is your definition.

However, there is a large majority of men who take advantage of the situation, as do the Japanese girls. There have been past posts on this page as well as others simply asking where are the hot girls in Japan. If that is their only reason for going to Japan, that is in poor form...and again, I have had men tell me this...that finding a Japanese girlfriend was one, if not the main, reason for coming here.

I tend to think that western women go for the experience more than the dating scene.

As far as western men being a decoration like a LV handbag, I could see where that would be the case. Some western men use women (not just Japanese) the same way. Again, western men are somewhat of a commodity in Japan and therefore they are sought after. Western women, well, not as much. I have also had Japanese women tell me that they loathe the western men because of their attitude and that they know the western men view Japanese girls as "yellow cabs" - everyone gets a ride. Some of the Japanese girl know what the western men are after and are smart enough to stay away from them. Others, well, ....their choice I guess.

Western men in Japan, for some part, are rather deplorable creatures. Their motives are dishonest and they are there for a good time, not a long time.

[nomadder]

Oh mr.pink. Please do tell me what my problems are as you must know me so well(not). All women who have responded either on the thread or via PM are in agreement so I'm afraid your personal attack will not wash. Alas I do not see you or the others giving a shred of evidence to the contrary. From this I can only surmise you to be a 3 dressed up as a 9 like so many others. If you take offense then it is only what you need for your personal growth. Happy learning.

[markosonlines]

I'm a 3 dressed up as a nine.

The reason why I'm a nine here is partly because, having grown up in a liberal society where women have a lot of freedom, I am liberal myself and am happy to cook, clean and listen to my partners opinions.

Former western girlfriends of mine have been willing to listen to my opinions they weren't very capable of cooking or cleaning, at least not without feeling [i]submissive[/i].

I look food, especially delicious food, and I like to live in a clean house too. My Japanese girlfriend can cook and clean (like me). I prefer my Japanese girlfriend.

Hence, a three becomes a nine - or in some cases a nine, like some of you are back in N. America or wherever you're from, becomes a three. I know where I'm appreciated, do you?

[rockwolf]

Hmm... I'm a 3, and in Japan I'm a 3.

As a white male, I had about the same luck in love in Japan as I do here in America. But in Japan I was just as shy as in the states.

Several of the other American guys who had no luck stateside became 'superstuds' on the campus. But the issue was more of being aggressive.

I'm not aggressive, therefor I had no luck

They were aggressive in Japan, although they were normally very shy in the states. I think it's the view that Japanese girls are more eager to meet Western men that causes a lot of these men to take the more aggressive stance in dating that they're used to.

Some guys start to view western women with a bit of bitterness also. The idea that they suddenly are attractive to Japanese women gets to their egos, and the women from their home soil who wouldn't give them the time of day are demanding to be treated with respect? Let's just say a grudge can last a very long time.



As for the guys that go to Japan just to meet women, they have already earned my contempt. I'm trying like crazy to get back to the country I love, with no expectations of becoming some pimp-daddy. I love Japan for the countryside, the people, and the culture. The best experiences a person can have are likely the ones that don't involve sexual gratification. Give me a bike, a lonely winding road through the mountains, and a random soda machine in the middle of nowhere, and I'm a happy guy.

[easyasabc]

[easyasabc]

Rockwolf,

Your names suits because .........

YOU ROCK!

Come on back to Japan and you can hang with us girls!

[canuck]

[markosonlines]

Easyasabc, I proclaimed myself a 3. I never said I couldn't get the cool girls (like you?). Most of my former girlfriends were cool. They just couldn't/didn't cook and clean much, unlike my Japanese girlfriend whom I must ask to stop! I left them to their fabulous, stylish, educated, articulate friends to do things with, having had enough of it, and am now enjoying something better.

So I didn't miss out as you imply, I simply chose to be with someone different and, like Canuck, would appreciate it if the label 'loser back home' was applied a little more discriminately, to people who didn't simply have the pleasure of dating Japanese women whilst in Japan. But perhaps my preference has defined me as a loser in your eyes?

I couldn't agree with you more that people who have a clue don't have stupid issues like feeling submissive over cooking. My comments were in response to foster, whom you may or may not recall, claimed:

[i]I read it described on another forum as the 2-10 idea. Men that were a '2' in their home country come to Japan to find that they are treated as though they are a '10'. Western women don't do this, so they avoid us. We tell them like it is. We don't coodle them and tell them oh poor baby and cook and clean up after them. Many Japanese women do this.[/i]

Such a crime, coodling and doing things for one another. My girlfriend is guilty of all three. I, in the meantime, hold a job. Traditional gender roles. So what? What's your gripe? Nobody cooking your dinner while you clock out at work? Poor baby.

Yet your arguments have merit, I am not trying to silence you. I have met guys over here and in Korea who become player