Job Discussion Forums

[SeasonedVet]

Anyone who has lived in Japan for more than a year might know of the highs and lows.
There are times when you feel like " Wow! I am actually living and working in Japan, something my parents never had the opportunity to do, and something most of my friends or relatives cannot do because of obligations at home; the chance has passed"

And there are times when you feel like " What-Am-I-Doing-Here-So-Far-From-Everything-I-Have-Come-To-Know-As-Home-And-Family-And-Friends-And-Culture-And-Food etc ..

There are times when you feel like leaving, and there are times when you feel like staying. There are Highs and there are lows.

Can anyone attest to this?

I wonder, for the guys who have Japanese girlfriends and those who are married, do you explain or talk about your high and low feelings with your partner/spouse?
If you do, does he/she understand?
If you don't, why don't you?
(private questions. maybe too private? Feel free to ignore the parts you don't wish to answer)

There may also be some non-Japanese living here who Do Not experience the highs and lows but who are on a perpetual High. Enjoying their lives in their adopted country.

Looking forward to hearing some experiences.

[kdynamic]

Everyone has highs and lows, and they are exaggerated when living in a foriegn culture. It's part of culture shock.

[wolfman]

Life is all about choices. Everything is subjective. You choose what it means to you.

I think that's why the highs and lows exist. Two different ways of looking at the same thing that isn't inherently good or bad.

[mtheta]

Hey man, I have only been here a month and I feel like that. It was bad last week, but the feeling past. I just need to keep the positives in mind and remember why I came here. It is human nature.

Nice to hear that Im not alone when it comes to those feelings.

[nawlinsgurl]

I can certainly attest to the lows of living in Japan--I complained about them several times on this board. But after taking some advice from friendly and informed people on this site, I eventually got over my miserable-ness. I bitched about not understanding and being able to communicate, but I started taking Japanese lessons to help that. I complained about my crappy Nova job, but now have a way better job to help that. I complained about the food, the stores, clothes that wouldn't fit me, and the inability of Japanese people to think outside of the box and almost all of those problems I have found solutions for except the last. I pretty happy with Japan right now, but my husband is another deal...if only I could find a solution for him...

[NorthofAmerica]

I have only been here a little over a month now but basically since the 2nd week I have been on an almost perpetual high. Sure, I get irritated at minor problems but overall I am much happier here than I was in Canada. I was constantly depressed and listless in Canada but here I find I can always get over periods of depression with a little reality check i.e. "Holy shit! I am in Japan right now!!" I know exactly what I left behind and don't really miss things too much.

The one thing that is hard is not having any companions to share all the crazy experiences and feelings you're going through. I have met many people here but there are still times I miss having an old friend to confide in. But whenever I get too lonely there are always plenty of friendly Japanese around and a blog and email to write in. I think the internet makes this whole experience MUCH more bearable than even say 10 or 15 years ago.

[luckyloser700]

I've been with my current J girl for over a year and I always tell her about the lows. It was hard for her at first and she would always defend the J people that I complained about or would tell me to go home if I didn't like the place; she never took my side. As our relationship grew, she became more willing to address some of the problems of this country and its people with me. And I became more open-minded about how I often saw things in a skewed light because I'm a Westerner. It's a lot easier for me now than it was before I met her to let lots of things I couldn't understand before just slide off my back.

Anyway, the highs here are pretty consistent for me; always have been. I often meet good people and continue to have new and interesting experiences. Even though there's a ton of shit that really bothers me about this country and the people, I still find myself happy to be here after several years. I've lived in and outside of Tokyo, in the countryside and in bigger cities. I wouldn't live anywhere but the Tokyo area given the choice, but I do hate the way so many people (not everyone) live like animals here in Tokyo. It's the thing that brings me down the most in this country; they push their way through crowds (sometimes almost violently), they cut in lines, they don't stop to help others who have fallen or landed in some other kind of trouble, and will sometimes walk away from you if you ask them a question (I expect this for myself, but it blows me away when it happens to my girlfriend or other J friends). Too many of these incidents occur inside of a week and I can get to feeling pretty low. I'm sure it's only a minority here that really sucks, but the crap that they pull sometimes just sticks in my head, clouding out all the good images and memories that have been stored in there while living in this country.
Yeah, the highs and lows of living here are always on our minds. I feel lucky that things are positive for me most of the time here. Lots of other foreigners have the low periods too often.

[SeasonedVet]

luckyloser,
Interesting post.
It is always good to find out how others are faring here.
Thanks for that. Very informative.
It's interesting how things seem to change over time.

[SeasonedVet]

[Glenski]

[furiousmilksheikali]

[luckyloser700]