Job Discussion Forums

[AjarnErnes]

I am a great big homosexual. I was never asked about my sexuality when I applied for my job at a MAJOR TEC. uni / prepa here in DF.

Several weeks ago I told my boss that I am gay and he said it wasn't a problem but I should give serious thought to not letting any of the students know. I have thought about it and I've decided that if any student asks me straight out, "Are you gay?" I'm going to tell the truth and say, "Yes I am."

I lived in the closet for 40 years of my life. It's dark and cold and scary in there. I won't go back in there again. If I lose my job because of it, so be it. Straight teachers talk about their lives in class all the time, why can't I?

ajarnernest

[Guy Courchesne]

[AjarnErnes]

I am a teacher and a professional. I cover the material in class that is needed to get points across to my students. I also believe that KNOWING your students and them KNOWING you as a teacher and a human being helps a lot in developing rapport, respect and a positive professional working relationship. Classroom discipline and management has a lot to do with your relationship with your students.

I know what is and isn't appropriate for the age group that I am teaching.

ajarnernest

[MELEE]

Ernest
I think you actually have a great opportunity. In the area of Mexico I know well, (I do not know D.F. well) there is quite a bit of homophobia, its stems from the same kind of ingnorace you see in the part of the US that I'm from. People's only experiences with homosexuals are movies like Priscilla Queen of the Desert. They make statements like "I don't know any homosexuals." And if you tell them that infact they do, X, Y and Z are all homosexuals, they are shocked and don't believe you. I think it not only fine to let your students know that you are gay. It's an important part of their education. It's important for them to see that normal professional people like yourself, might just happen to be gay. And that one can be gay without being a drag queen (I'm assuming your not. )

But as for straight people talking about their lives in class all the time, not necessarily true. I rarely do in a deep way. My current students might guess I'm married (I wear a wedding ring after all). I have mentioned that I have to leave right away to pick up my daughters. But I don't go out of my way to tell them things about my husband, who is a graduate of this school and infact we first meet when he was in my class almost 9 years ago. Its only been in the last two years that there are no students left at the university who know that because its a small school and he's a popular guy. I'm rather enjoying the privacy and don't plan on releaving my private life to my students.
But that's my story, and everyone's situation is different.

[Guy Courchesne]

[AjarnErnes]

Guy wrote:

"Does that answer your question?"

What was the question again?

Oh yes, am I, a gay man ALLOWED to be "real and human" in my class with my students?

That remains to be seen.

ajarnernest

[Ben Round de Bloc]

There are several issues involved here, IMHO.

I think it comes down to what an individual teacher feels he needs to share or not share with his students in order to be "real and human" in the classroom. My personal point of view is that I don't believe it's anyone else's business whether my preference for intimacy is with women or men or sheep . . . or all of the above . . . together at the same time. I don't believe students need to know my sexual preferences in order for me to develop good rapport with them, teach them English, and be good at classroom management.

I believe in mutual respect between a teacher and his students as well as among students in my classroom. Part of that mutual respect involves what's acceptable to ask/tell and what isn't. I would never ask my students things like Is your family rich/poor? How often do you have sex? Are you straight/gay? By the same token, I wouldn't consider it appropriate for my students to ask me or their classmates those things.

But that's just me. The bottom line is that nobody here can tell you what kind of personal information you should or shouldn't share with your students. That's a decision you have to make.

[TheLongWayHome]

Why are teachers obsessed with talking about their private lives? Just teach.

Why do gays feel the need to tell everyone they're gay? Like some kind of mental challenge to whoever's listening. Straight teachers don't go around professing their straightness. I don't care who's gay and who isn't. I don't care which way my teacher swings as long as he/she's a good teacher. Unfortunately this level of thinking is unattainable to most of Mexico so why even bring it up? I've had students, males especially that when reading a text that says something like, '... I went into town with my boyfriend', will change the boyfriend to girlfriend if they are reading aloud in class.

In San Luis, the most close-minded state in Mexico, the people have nothing else to do but trade gossip. You learn not to talk about yourself. If you talk about your private life here, it literally gets spread across town. You realize this when several random strangers know where you live, what you do, who you teach, that you don't like pozole but you do like tacos al pastor.

I find Mexicans rude in this aspect--if you give in to them and divulge your entire motivation for coming to Mexico etc. you are buena onda. If not, you are sangron(a).

[AjarnErnes]

The thing is, the world assumes that everyone is straight, it's called "heterocentric". You don't HAVE to say to your students that you are straight, it's already assumed.

As of yet I have not told any of my students that I'm gay, though none of them have come right out and asked me. If a student asks you what you did last weekend you might say that you went out with your girlfriend or your wife. I feel like I have to say I went out with "friends".

If you ARE straight you may be able to sympathise but you can't really KNOW what it is like to be gay in a hetrocentric world. If a black child gets picked on at school because he's black he can go home and his family will be able to empathise. If a gay child gets picked on at school for being gay he generally has no one to turn to. He generally can't go home and cry to his parents.

Don't you think there are gay students out there that need a positive gay role model too?

ajarnernest

[ls650]

Hmm. Maybe it's that Oaxaca is different from other Mexican states, but on this campus there are several students and teachers who are openly gay/lesbian. No one else here gives a damn.

[delacosta]

Same here at my campus, no one cares at all. And even in town, Puerto Angel and Zipol, which are both really small, the gays are totally out.

Why we even have a gay prof with both ears peirced and dyed hair!

When I've had discussions in class that had relationships as a topic my gay students felt completely comfortable about using the term boyfriend ,etc.
I guess one would have to assess the particular enviornment one is teaching in and decide how far they're willing to go, how much one want's to reveal about oneself.
It's a personal and professional decision that's up to each individual.

[Samantha]

Same here in my area. I guess the beach areas ARE that much more laid back but that's not to say that teachers discuss their sexual orientations in classrooms. No way that is appropriate.

[Ben Round de Bloc]

[AjarnErnes]

That is a part of my point. Do your gay students feel comfortable and SAFE being able to mention things about their lives in class? I think having an openly gay teacher in this school would help the gay students feel safer and allow them to have someone to go to for support and counsel if needed. Though I am not a counselor, I am a teacher.

Do you as a teacher do anything to address the heterocentrism that is inherent in western culture? And in your classrooms?

Are you a part of perpetuating bigotry and steroetypes that give tacit consent to this way of thinking? Or do you address it and TEACH your students lessons that are beyond just the textbook?

Last month I had my students do research on Darfur and the genocide going on there. That was NOT covered in the textbook. I had them learn about the issue and then write 3 letters, one to George Bush, one to Kofi Anan and one to Vicente Fox about the issue and what is being done about it. Not in the textbook but an important lesson for the students that broadened their information of the world and their place in it.

I teach not only what's in the textbook but much much more. I think any decent teacher is intertested in helping their students learn more than just the textbook.

ajarnernest

[PlayadelSoul]