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Ivyclub
Joined: 15 Dec 2006
Posts: 24
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 Posted: Wed Feb 28, 2007 7:39 pm Post subject: Top ten reasons why American ESL teachers sound better |
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as opposed to anybody else...
10. Everybody else's resume features the words "Curriculum Vitae".
9. Ban the word "cheers", use "thanks" instead, and thank me later.
8. Try learning phonetics while staring at those infamous teeth that never saw fluoride.
7. This mateyness thing should stay wherever it came from.
6. RP? What RP? Your scouse, cockney, geordie, estuary... We still can't understand you.
5. What a cast of characters at the British preferred only teachers schools- quitters, bulldozers, hangmen, henchmen, lurkers, skulkers, spies, spymasters, pub employees, fish and chips store manager assistants, informers and a firing squad to boot... Grand Opera. They have it all.
4. Wanna speak like in the movies? You ain't seen nothin' yet.
3. Why bother hiring the Mr. I'm-too-good-to-compare-my-accent-to-yours?
2. "We're only here for the beer" a Commonwealth teacher stated.
1. Go ahead. Blog me. We're still calling the shots. |
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jonniboy
Joined: 18 Jun 2006
Posts: 751
Location: Panama City, Panama
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| Posted: Wed Feb 28, 2007 11:22 pm Post subject: |
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Some, if not most of it true  so in the same tongue in cheek spirit
Being a British English speaker, you don't have to explain
10. that roommates are people you don't usually share a room with
9. that a bathroom frequently doesn't contain a bath
8. that French fries aren't French
7. that a raincheck has nothing to do with the weather
6. what 'the centre' means or endure the quizzical looks that 'downtown' gets
5. that a drug store isn't a place where you buy narcotics
4. that Scotch tape isn't Scotch
3. why you use like 100 times in a sentence
2. You don't need to mumble incoherently or look at the ground when asked about your working rights for Western Europe. "EU passport? Which of em would you like to see?"
1. and finally if you're from Ireland, unlike those pesky English or Americans, you don't need to tiptoe over the delicate subject of foreign politics or national leaders.  |
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dynow
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
Posts: 1080
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:32 am Post subject: |
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i'm disappointed in myself i'm even entertaining this thread, but:
-this is such typical "IvyClub" banter.
-i give this thread till the end of the day before it is locked, another common occurence when "IvyClub" posts.
I don't wish to go on any further about this, and last time I gently let this guy have it for a similar reason, he never responded.
Just another tit for tat, pi$$ing contest post that does absolutely nothing to help people teaching or people looking to teach abroad.
I called Princeton last night, let them know they need to add Appropriateness 101 to their curriculum. |
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Tumteetum
Joined: 04 Feb 2005
Posts: 144
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 5:43 am Post subject: |
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| Dynow, did someone pi$$ in your herbata or have you always been such a laugh? |
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gregoryfromcali
Joined: 25 Feb 2005
Posts: 1207
Location: People's Republic of Shanghai
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 5:47 am Post subject: |
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You dudes and blokes, take your jobs way to seriously!
Last edited by gregoryfromcali on Thu Mar 01, 2007 6:09 am; edited 1 time in total |
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dynow
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
Posts: 1080
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 6:03 am Post subject: |
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| yeah, yeah, yeah....i know it came off a little strong, but I'm just telling it like it is. |
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Ivyclub
Joined: 15 Dec 2006
Posts: 24
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 2:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
You dudes and blokes, take your jobs way to seriously!
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For the good guys: my point exactly. Every student had at one point made fun of his/her teacher. I've never taken myself seriously. More often than not I seem to poke a bit of fun at my colleagues from the Isles.
| Quote: |
i'm disappointed in myself i'm even entertaining this thread, but:
-this is such typical "IvyClub" banter.
-i give this thread till the end of the day before it is locked, another common occurence when "IvyClub" posts.
I don't wish to go on any further about this, and last time I gently let this guy have it for a similar reason, he never responded.
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I won't allow this thread to get locked. See, I used to post in a more assertive way. Back then, I was having fun pushing the buttons of the opinionated . Now, more actively and resolutely, on a lighter note, I seem to unleash the same beasties, like the forerunner above and let them roam around this thread instead of leaving a constructive retort. I guess he thought I was alluding to him, my base.
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Just another tit for tat, pi$$ing contest post that does absolutely nothing to help people teaching or people looking to teach abroad.
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I sure hope this post may contribute to the cause of not hiring teachers without a sense of humor.
Dynow, did you happen to forget the twelve steps?
Last edited by Ivyclub on Fri Mar 02, 2007 3:15 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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Henry_Cowell
Joined: 27 May 2005
Posts: 3352
Location: Berkeley
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 7:40 pm Post subject: |
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| Ivyclub wrote: |
| Now, in a more actively and resolutely note... |
That's not American English, nor is it British, Canadian, or Irish English.
It's just bad English. "Ivy" indeed. |
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Alex Shulgin
Joined: 20 Jul 2003
Posts: 553
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 7:53 pm Post subject: Re: Top ten reasons why American ESL teachers sound better |
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| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 10. Everybody else's resume features the words "Curriculum Vitae". |
Doubtful. Most non-Yanks realise that if a boss needs to see the words "Curriculum Vitae" (or �Resume�) at the top of a CV in order to recognise it is a CV, that boss isn�t worth working for.
Most people who haven�t supposedly spent three years teaching at an Ivy League school would know that it is most unlikely that everybody who is not American has the same resume. So they would write �Everybody else�s resumes feature the �.�
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 9. Ban the word "cheers", use "thanks" instead, and thank me later. |
Which nation had a very popular TV series called �Cheers�?
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 8. Try learning phonetics while staring at those infamous teeth that never saw fluoride. |
As opposed to looking at the mottled teeth which result from fluorosis.
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 7. This mateyness thing should stay wherever it came from. |
I�m sure I�m not alone in thinking that Poland (and this forum) would be a better place if you had stayed where you come from. By the way, which country first popularised faux-politeness? As in �Have a nice day!�
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 6. RP? What RP? Your scouse, *beep*, geordie, estuary... We still can't understand you. |
Unlike a certain graduate of two Ivy League schools who was selected and then elected president of the USA even though nobody can understand what he says.
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 5. What a cast of characters at the British preferred only teachers schools |
What were you saying about nobody being able to understand? �British preferred only teachers schools�? What on earth are you jabbering about?
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 4. Wanna speak like in the movies? You ain't seen nothin' yet. |
Would I like to sound like somebody from the moving pictures? No thank you.
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 3. Why bother hiring the Mr. I'm-too-good-to-compare-my-accent-to-yours? |
Why bother hiring Mr I-went-to-an-Ivy-League-school-and-that�s-why-I-don�t-know-in-which-years-of-the-course-I-claimed-to-have-taken-the-students-teach?
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 2. "We're only here for the beer" a Commonwealth teacher stated. |
I can�t argue with that point. A single teacher from an unspecified country said something so that must make all teachers from the USA better than all teachers from Commonwealth countries.
| Ivyclub wrote: |
| 1. Go ahead. Blog me. We're still calling the shots. |
Do tell us why the language is called �English� and not �American�. Actually, on second thoughts, don�t bother. Just go away and don�t bother coming back. Find a board where people might believe that you did graduate from a decent school. We here have already read the post where you made it clear that you did not graduate from the school you claim to have graduated from.
Toodle pip old chap! |
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nabakow30
Joined: 25 Jan 2006
Posts: 35
Location: Ljubljana, Slovenia
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| Posted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 10:30 pm Post subject: |
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At the risk of sounding lazy.....
Thanks Alex, for saving me the trouble of systematically exposing (let's be honest, just a few of the myriad ) Ivy's weknesses...
though this person is, frankly, laughable at best, there is still a certain childish pleasure to be gained in his being ridiculed.
Ivy- if your idea of pressing buttons amounts to (with a distinct lack of awareness) writing in awful English and watching people pick up on it...your psychological games are truly awe-inspiring.
Please.
Please.
Sort it out.
There are many ways to do this.... |
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dynow
Joined: 07 Nov 2006
Posts: 1080
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 12:29 am Post subject: |
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"Ivy Leauge"................................."Bindair...........",
total comedy. yes, you're right. you've really toned it down, and this thread won't get locked because you've learned so much from previous experience.......
this will be my last post until this thread is all locked up.....
-dynow |
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Ivyclub
Joined: 15 Dec 2006
Posts: 24
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 6:15 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
Most people who haven�t supposedly spent three years teaching at an Ivy League school would know that it is most unlikely that everybody who is not American has the same resume. So they would write �Everybody else�s resumes feature the �.�
and another one
Mr I-went-to-an-Ivy-League-school-and-that�s-why-I-don�t-know-in-which-years-of-the-course-I-claimed-to-have-taken-the-students-teach
and another one,
Just go away and don�t bother coming back. Find a board where people might believe that you did graduate from a decent school. We here have already read the post where you made it clear that you did not graduate from the school you claim to have graduated from.
and another one,
Thanks Alex, for saving me the trouble of systematically exposing (let's be honest, just a few of the myriad ) Ivy's weknesses...
though this person is, frankly, laughable at best, there is still a certain childish pleasure to be gained in his being ridiculed.
Ivy- if your idea of pressing buttons amounts to (with a distinct lack of awareness) writing in awful English and watching people pick up on it...your psychological games are truly awe-inspiring.
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I found the replies very amusing. Some attack the way I write because they never read enough or they are still stuck in the O-level. These people are just flat-out mediocrities. My personal favorites are the ones from Alex that can't just admit that there are people who had the chance to go to better schools because the parents could afford it. Graduating from both, Princeton and Harvard, wasn't that big of a deal. There are certain majors that aren't as reputable as Business, Law or Medicine. English is not one of them. I set the record straight before and I quote:
| Quote: |
Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 10:06 pm Post subject:
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This is for Alex,
FYI what you read is a handbook that is broad information and doesn't dive into specifics fellows really have to endure or achieve to make the most out of the program. Only accelerated students coming with good standings and an undergraduate degree from another Ivy League school, like my case-an AB from Princeton- could have got the right pull and get to teach during the second year. Most of the fellows had to teach during the second year anyway because the PhD fast track didn't have enough candidates to cover all the teaching assignments. You have two choices: you can complete your requirements earlier and take shortcuts on the timetable or you can follow the program which is designed to suck money most of us can't afford to amount.
If your passion for infiltrating in the complicated life of a fellow in Harvard keeps you from sleeping, maybe you should try spending less time with teachers outside your pay level.
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Alex, I reckon you are an old man who's been living in Poland for quite some time now. Once in a while you feel like giving trivial advice about local restaurants, bureaucracy and whatnot. We presume you make a living as a teacher (?) most likely without credentials or significant education to back everything you said above. I wonder if your time has come, the time where I should unmask you and make fun of you too. I can see how your upbringing, lack of proper education has made you a bitter and envious person. Is it a drinking problem? Check with Dynow and its twelve steps. Maybe you two can make it over the hill.
Last edited by Ivyclub on Fri Mar 02, 2007 3:19 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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Henry_Cowell
Joined: 27 May 2005
Posts: 3352
Location: Berkeley
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 6:33 am Post subject: |
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If you did so well at Harvard and Princeton, why is it that you cannot learn the simple use of the quote function on Dave's ESL Cafe? Surely even the rats and monkeys in the Ivy psych labs can do it.
And your writing skills are perhaps more appropriate to Framingham State College, which is in the same state as Harvard but has standards closer to your own level. |
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Ivyclub
Joined: 15 Dec 2006
Posts: 24
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 7:34 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: |
If you did so well at Harvard and Princeton, why is it that you cannot learn the simple use of the quote function on Dave's ESL Cafe? Surely even the rats and monkeys in the Ivy psych labs can do it.
And your writing skills are perhaps more appropriate to Framingham State College, which is in the same state as Harvard but has standards closer to your own level. |
Who are you again? Is it Henry_Cowell your real name? Maybe your brother Simon Cowell from American Idol can teach you how to fake a British accent, or sing "HMS Pinafore".
So what do you know about my curriculum in Harvard? Were you able to spell �Massachusetts� before you read my post?
| Quote: |
Ivyclub wrote:
Now, in a more actively and resolutely note...
That's not American English, nor is it British, Canadian, or Irish English.
It's just bad English. "Ivy" indeed. |
It is called "plain English" where some of us got educated before going to graduate school. Question: Did you skip high school and University to get your CELTA? It seems to be a common practice in your neck of the woods.
Which school did you go to again? Maybe you just completed stage 3 and decided to work with your uncle at the pub because the school system wasn't really for you after all.
Last edited by Ivyclub on Fri Mar 02, 2007 3:20 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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joshsweigart
Joined: 27 Feb 2005
Posts: 66
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| Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 12:14 pm Post subject: |
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Ivy--thanks for shaking it up a bit--you've made it fun to read eslcafe again. There was a dry spell there for a while. I just hope that the quoting doesn't get to extensive because it begins to hurt my eyes having to scroll down to read one post. I'm sure everyone can appreciate a good target.
cheers and thanks |
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