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DO U WANNA RETIRE ON A PENSION OR YOUR KNEES?
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would u buy a comic for TEFL teachers?
YES AT ANY PRICE
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
YES IF IT COST LESS THAN 10 YTL
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
YES IF IT COST LESS THAN 5 YTL
40%
 40%  [ 2 ]
NO BUT I MIGHT STEAL IT OFF A MATE
20%
 20%  [ 1 ]
NO GET A LIFE AND PUBLISH A COURSE BOOK
40%
 40%  [ 2 ]
Total Votes : 5

Author Message
MEDRACER



Joined: 28 May 2007
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 2:33 pm    Post subject: DO U WANNA RETIRE ON A PENSION OR YOUR KNEES? Reply with quote

My Dear TEFLERS

Allow me to introduce myself, although most of you will know me already: I am Doa Yalanjolu. I run the Yalankur English Language Institutes, with over 200 branches around Turkey. I am exceedingly rich, and soon my institute will be granted university status. I started from practically nothing only 4 years ago, but thanks to your wonderful cooperation, my dear TEFLERS, we are now the second major establishment in Turkish TEFL after the British Council. Allow me to detail the ways in which my dear non-turkish TEFLERS have helped YELI on its fantastic route to success.

Thank you for:

Allowing me to employ unqualified, inexperienced staff without residence or work permits alongside (and often instead of) legally approved teachers

Accepting my sub-standard accommodation without so much as a murmur, indeed often agreeing to pay some percentage of the rent for your miserable hovels.

Doing untold hours of unpaid overtime in preparing materials for Yalankur Publications, taking the students out on pointless activities where they just natter away to each other in Turkish, or just hanging around the school premises from morning to evening ezan just so we can show you off to any potential clients as real native speakers.

Relieving me of any obligation to pay mandatory contributions to the tax department or to the SSK insurance scheme, thereby allowing me to pocket your future pension money, OR...

Allowing my accountants to enter your salaries at ridiculously low amounts, so at least I dont have to fork out anything like the full insurance (which might then have been added to your contributions in your country of origin via reciprocal agreements).

Agreeing to turn a blind eye to the outright deceits detailed above, or even supporting me in reciting these lies parrot fashion to the police, to SSK or to Labour Ministry Inspectors, or for clearing-off sharpish whenever these dratted nosey-parkers are slated to appear.

Neglecting to keep any record whatsoever of your terms of employment with YELI, whether that be a signed contract, or salary receipts, or even of the hours you worked each week.

Being generally naive and trusting when we first hire you, being ignorant of the law even after your suspicions have been aroused, remaining inactive even after your rights have been explained in detail by your embassies or consulates, and just vanishing from the scene when you and the school finally fall out.

For these and so much more, my DEAR TEFLERS, I thank you from the bottom of my heart (not to mention my wallet). Your cooperation as been magnificent, and I would not insult you by offering a single kurush compensation from the profits you have helped me make, in so sacrificing yourselves on behalf of my business.

In closing, I would like to draw your attention to my forth-coming publication "Yalankur: School of Lies. A comic for TEFL teachers". Each episode tells of a pet project Yalankur tries to launch in a small provincial branch, and how the pesky DOS Jack Prozak tries to sabotage it. Call it pre-launch market research if you like, but please indicate in the poll ABOVE if you would ever subscribe to such a publication.

With eternal gratitude

Doa Yalanjolu

PS can somebody explain how to up an image?
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dmb



Joined: 12 Feb 2003
Posts: 8397

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 3:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:

PS can somebody explain how to up an image
Get Baba to appear in your ads.... he's been on telly and everything
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Baba Alex



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 2411

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 4:06 pm    Post subject: Re: DO U WANNA RETIRE ON A PENSION OR YOUR KNEES? Reply with quote

MEDRACER wrote:

PS can somebody explain how to up an image?


[img] then write image address in here [/img]
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MEDRACER



Joined: 28 May 2007
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 8:23 pm    Post subject: YOU WORK FOR ME Reply with quote

Entrailicus wrote:
I take it you already advertise on Dave's for staff.


I'd say every single one of those TEFL establishments advertising on Dave's or anybody else's site is guilty of such malpractice, and that every single TEFLER in this or any other forum is equally guilty of acquiescence in such deceit. I heard once, you seldom get what you want, but you often get what you deserve. Which of course indicts me as a TEFLER just as much as it indicts the likes of Yalankur.

BUT IT DOESNT HAVE TO BE THIS WAY!

PS: what "image address"? I got some great jpegs on me desktop. Call me digitally challenged, but I really havent a clue beyond simple vocabulary like "click this, cut this, paste that".

PPS: Baba, you ever do a TV chef video one time?
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yaramaz



Joined: 05 Mar 2003
Posts: 2384
Location: Not where I was before

PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 10:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Upload your jpegs to a web based photo storage site lik flickr.com or photobucket, then you can cut and paste the link to the photo and put it between [img]the image thingies[/img] like this.


I don't know if or how you can do it directly from desktop to here. I use photobucket if I'm not stealing directly from some one else's site.
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dmb



Joined: 12 Feb 2003
Posts: 8397

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 6:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No you can't use photos directly from desktop.


btw I went to the newest speech bubbles production last "A funny thing happened on the way to the forum "There wasn't a single reference to Baba!
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Baba Alex



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 2411

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 12:03 pm    Post subject: Re: YOU WORK FOR ME Reply with quote

[quote="MEDRACER"]
Entrailicus wrote:

PPS: Baba, you ever do a TV chef video one time?


My first ever ambition was to become a TV chef.
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Baba Alex



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 2411

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 6:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Entrailicus wrote:
Hey!



heh! I don't know how that happened. I expect it has something to do with the vodka I drank for breakfast.
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MEDRACER



Joined: 28 May 2007
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2007 11:43 am    Post subject: TEFLERS: TERMINALLY ENFEEBLED FACETIOUS LOSERS Reply with quote

Gin? Vodka? CORNFLAKES??

DO YOU LOSERS EVEN KNOW WHAT COUNTRY YOU'RE IN?

You might at least try Raki with cheese and olives.

HALLAHALLAHALLAH
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Baba Alex



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 2411

PostPosted: Sun Jun 03, 2007 1:20 pm    Post subject: Re: TEFLERS: TERMINALLY ENFEEBLED FACETIOUS LOSERS Reply with quote

MEDRACER wrote:
Gin? Vodka? CORNFLAKES??

DO YOU LOSERS EVEN KNOW WHAT COUNTRY YOU'RE IN?

You might at least try Raki with cheese and olives.

HALLAHALLAHALLAH


I'm no loser I'm a winner, vodka and kokore� for breakfast. The breakfast of winners.
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MEDRACER



Joined: 28 May 2007
Posts: 57

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 11:09 am    Post subject: I'M TELLING DAVE Reply with quote

I'M TELLING DAVE MY THREAD'S BEEN HIJACKED BY NON-JOB RELATED POSTS SO THERE.

UNLESS U COMPLIMENT MY AVATAR, WHICH IS EASILY THE BEST IN FORUM

AND ANYWAY IT SHOULD BE "BREAKFAST of CHAMPIONS"

LOSERS
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dmb



Joined: 12 Feb 2003
Posts: 8397

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 1:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

For a short while I thought Yalankur was Thrifty/31/ekmekparasi. The message is the same but you managed to get an avatar quite quickly. He could never manage that.... or quoting. welcome aboard. as thrifty has gone AWOL we need a miserable anti EFL person to liven things up.... I do miss thrifty though.
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yaramaz



Joined: 05 Mar 2003
Posts: 2384
Location: Not where I was before

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 1:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah but Steve doesn't count. He isn't as obsessively negative. Very Happy
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Baba Alex



Joined: 17 Aug 2004
Posts: 2411

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 1:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Entrailicus wrote:
We have Otterman Ollie.


I like both Mr. Otter and Mr. Thrifty.

Yaramaz, on the other hand, * pokes tounge out *.
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dmb



Joined: 12 Feb 2003
Posts: 8397

PostPosted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 2:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Yaramaz, on the other hand,
...... makes you fart? Maybe we have got to the bottom(tee hee) of your problem.
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