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shuize
Joined: 04 Sep 2004 Posts: 1270
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 10:54 pm Post subject: |
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| zorro (3) wrote: |
Shuize, some of those pics made me feel physically sick. WTF?!?!?!?!? Why would you want to put a fork in your tongue? Or a couple of bumps in your head? Or seventy nine pieces of inch long metal through your face?
I don't get it.... |
Questioning or joking about something means you're passive-aggressive. |
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partialtone
Joined: 09 May 2007 Posts: 137 Location: CA
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 10:55 pm Post subject: |
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| shuize wrote: |
| zorro (3) wrote: |
Shuize, some of those pics made me feel physically sick. WTF?!?!?!?!? Why would you want to put a fork in your tongue? Or a couple of bumps in your head? Or seventy nine pieces of inch long metal through your face?
I don't get it.... |
Questioning ior joking about it means you're passive-aggressive. |
Ahahaha. Pathetic. |
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zorro (3)
Joined: 19 Dec 2006 Posts: 202
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 11:20 pm Post subject: |
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| it's not for you to "get" or judge, it was their choice --- like a small tattoo or piercing may be someone elses, or shaving your head might be yours. |
I still don't get it. Seriously. I don't. |
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furiousmilksheikali

Joined: 31 Jul 2006 Posts: 1660 Location: In a coffee shop, splitting a 30,000 yen tab with Sekiguchi.
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 11:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Manada wrote: |
| But the extremity of what they've done is beside the point - it's not for you to "get" or judge, it was their choice --- like a small tattoo or piercing may be someone elses, or shaving your head might be yours. *shrug* |
The bad news for you is that it is for those who interview you to judge. It is a silly eat-your-cake-and-keep-it idea that someone can do anything they want to express themselves and yet not be judged on that form of expression. |
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kdynamic

Joined: 05 Nov 2005 Posts: 562 Location: Japan
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 11:58 pm Post subject: |
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Wow, you guys seriously need to take a deep breath and calm down. Yes the Japanese see us as freaks. What I mean by that is that we look different and are expected to act and think differently. That means that, while conservative Japanese society might leave little wiggle room for a Japanese person with a nose ring, as foriegners it's much more readily accepted.
If you really think Japanese people don't look at you and notice all the un-Japanese features you have, you're kidding yourself. Yes we are freaks here. Why do you think people stare at us and comment on everything from our hair color to leg length to shoe size? Why do you think they react with shock and awe if we say we eat normal Japanese food or watch normal Japanese TV? Because they expect us to be different.
Maybe the problem here is different definitions of the word 'freak' but I am using it to mean "any abnormal phenomenon or product or unusual object; anomaly; aberration" (dictionary.com) or "A thing or occurrence that is markedly unusual or irregular. An abnormally formed organism, especially a person or animal regarded as a curiosity" (American Heritage). I honestly don't think those characterizations are too far off. |
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shuize
Joined: 04 Sep 2004 Posts: 1270
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 12:04 am Post subject: |
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| furiousmilksheikali wrote: |
| The bad news for you is that it is for those who interview you to judge. It is a silly eat-your-cake-and-keep-it idea that someone can do anything they want to express themselves and yet not be judged on that form of expression. |
Exactly right, again.
As I mentioned, this thread has provided much entertainment. I'm not sure what I'm enjoying more, watching people who claim not to care what society thinks about their style of individual expression getting defensive about it or those who claim to be all about accepting people for who they are turning judgmental when others disagree. |
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furiousmilksheikali

Joined: 31 Jul 2006 Posts: 1660 Location: In a coffee shop, splitting a 30,000 yen tab with Sekiguchi.
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 12:38 am Post subject: |
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| kdynamic wrote: |
| Yes we are freaks here. |
Speak for yourself.
From your same source, the American Heritage Dictionary, a freak is "An abnormally formed organism, especially a person or animal regarded as a curiosity or monstrosity. " I see you ommitted the rest of the sentence as it didn't serve you well. A little dishonest don't you think?
The same source also describes a freak as "An eccentric or nonconformist person, especially a member of a counterculture." |
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kdynamic

Joined: 05 Nov 2005 Posts: 562 Location: Japan
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 12:45 am Post subject: |
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| furiousmilksheikali wrote: |
| kdynamic wrote: |
| Yes we are freaks here. |
Speak for yourself.
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You can live in fantasy land if you like. Have fun!
And I ommited part of the definition because I was explaining what I meant by the term. |
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furiousmilksheikali

Joined: 31 Jul 2006 Posts: 1660 Location: In a coffee shop, splitting a 30,000 yen tab with Sekiguchi.
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 12:47 am Post subject: |
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| kdynamic wrote: |
| furiousmilksheikali wrote: |
| kdynamic wrote: |
| Yes we are freaks here. |
Speak for yourself.
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You can live in fantasy land if you like. Have fun!
And I ommited part of the definition because I was explaining what I meant by the term. |
That's a good one, that. The Humpty-Dumpty defence. Words have whatever meaning I intend them to have. |
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gaijinalways
Joined: 29 Nov 2005 Posts: 2279
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 12:58 am Post subject: |
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Yes, I would agree with you, but then that statement again seems at odd with some of your statements on dating (in another thread), and certainly statements that another poster said about marriage. After all, who wants to marry or date a freak, another freak perhaps?
But, a little more on topic, we're talking about getting employment, not finding friends you want to hang out with, and these are general guidelines, nothing anyone wants you to live your life by. But you do have to realize some will judge you by your appearance and decide if you are employable or not.
Chill baby, chill!  |
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Nagoyaguy
Joined: 15 May 2003 Posts: 425 Location: Aichi, Japan
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 1:06 am Post subject: |
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As a general question, I'd like to know why it is so taboo to "judge" someone. The way a person treats their body and presents themself to the public is probably a good general indicator of many things. It's simple social reality. Not a foolproof system by any means, but one that is used.
Totally off topic, but I heard the same thing in the Democratic candidate debates in the US last week. One of the candidates was incredibly reluctant to say something simple like "I think (name) is wrong about..." because he didnt want to seem judgemental. Instead, he said, "I am right about ..." Talk about pussyfooting around! |
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shuize
Joined: 04 Sep 2004 Posts: 1270
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 1:09 am Post subject: |
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| furiousmilksheikali wrote: |
| That's a good one, that. The Humpty-Dumpty defence. Words have whatever meaning I intend them to have. |
Welcome to the post-modernist world: People are not to be judged by their actions and words can have whatever meaning we like. |
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furiousmilksheikali

Joined: 31 Jul 2006 Posts: 1660 Location: In a coffee shop, splitting a 30,000 yen tab with Sekiguchi.
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 1:19 am Post subject: |
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| shuize wrote: |
| furiousmilksheikali wrote: |
| That's a good one, that. The Humpty-Dumpty defence. Words have whatever meaning I intend them to have. |
Welcome to the post-modernist world: People are not to be judged by their actions and words can have whatever meaning we like. |
What do you mean, shuize? Like, I'm not judging. |
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gaijinalways
Joined: 29 Nov 2005 Posts: 2279
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 2:49 am Post subject: |
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| What do you mean, shuize? Like, I'm not judging. |
Classic Ali!
Wait a minute, 'classic', what did I mean?!  |
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kdynamic

Joined: 05 Nov 2005 Posts: 562 Location: Japan
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Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 2:54 am Post subject: |
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furious: every word has a variety of connotations and denotations. A word like "freak" not only has a multitude of disparate definitions, but also has very different nuances for different people. Some people think it's a very negative word. Others embrace it. Clarifying which of many various meanings I was going for in a given context is, I think, quite reasonable. It's not as if I used to word to mean something it didn't mean. I used it to mean something specific: a person who is, above all, different from the norm. I don't think that meaning is such a stretch, seeing as though it's the first definition in the dictionary.
I don't know what you tell yourself, but no matter what you do, no matter how good your Japanese is, no matter how perfectly you follow japanese rules and customs, no matter how long you are here, most Japanese people will always see you as a freak. You may not like it, but 's true.
| gaijinalways wrote: |
| that statement again seems at odd with some of your statements on dating (in another thread), and certainly statements that another poster said about marriage. After all, who wants to marry or date a freak, another freak perhaps? |
I don't think it's at odds with other things I have said. Being a freak can have its advantages. Freaks are exotic. Freaks are interesting. Just because most Japanese people will always look at you and see something first and foremost un-Japanese does not mean you can't have good Japanese friends, or fall in love, or have a positive experience here. It doesn't mean you can't have mutual respect with some people.
But the truth is that a LOT of Japanese people who want to date or marry a foriegner are themselves a little "different"... they might be more open minded or well-travelled or what have you. I think this can be a very good thing since those are often interesting people. But yeah, many of them are freaks. And they will be seen as deviating from the norm by their non-freak friends and neighbors for dating or marrying a non-Japanese. Some might it as a positive thing, and others as a negative thing, but all will see it as different and out of the ordinary.
| Quote: |
| But, a little more on topic, we're talking about getting employment, not finding friends you want to hang out with, and these are general guidelines, nothing anyone wants you to live your life by. But you do have to realize some will judge you by your appearance and decide if you are employable or not. |
Absolutely. That is a fact of life. However, just because I admit that people make assumptions about people with piercings does not mean I have to admit those assumptions are right. They're not. What someone takes my piercings to mean is out of my control, but what they really mean is up to me.
My whole point here is that in Japan, we are different. We are weird. No matter what we do. In a suit and tie and speaking perfect Japanese we are still weird (if not more weird) to most Japanese. So things like piercings are judged differently than back home, and differently than if they were on a Japanese person. |
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