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unchi pants · Joined: 20 Dec 2003 Posts: 64

No, it's not a Rod Stewart revival ...

Following the worst Christmas of my life ... stuck behind a computer in an office in Naka Meguro surrounded by 20 ugly grey suited ojisan salraymen and being asked to do overtime ...

The night has finally arrived Exclamation

...

The dreaded company bonenkai Exclamation

Spending the night sitting around drinking shochu with those same grey suited ojisan salarymen ... Oh what joy Sad

... Having to answer questions like "Why aren't you married?" "Will you marry a Japanese woman" ... And having to sit through shacho's babblings (and keep a straight face) about the importance of the Japanese wife in the salaryman's life. YA DA! Give me the chopsticks line anyday ... "Oh you can use chopsticks!? Jouzu desu ne."

And worst of all ... This morning shacho has been threating us with karaoke after bonenkai. YA DA!

Any bonenkai horror stories out there ?

Unchi Pants

Gordon · Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Posts: 5309 Location: Japan

I had mine 2 weeks ago. When entering the banquet room, there was an 80kg tuna sitting there. After the boring speeches, they started to carve up the thing. The blood was a flowing, but then after they all lined up for a piece of sashimi. Everyone was surprised when I said that company parties in Canada don't carve up raw animals in front of you. At least the roast beef is somewhat cooked. Then they did the traditional karaoke (yes, they do it every year). That's when I made my exit. Couldn't handle listening to a bunch of drunks trying to sing.

foster · Joined: 07 Feb 2003 Posts: 485 Location: Honkers, SARS

Never suffered anythign like that in Japan...but last week awe had out school's 20th anniversary dinner. Told to be at the restaurant by 60...no food served until 930. Horrible entertainment (fat kids being Jacky Chan and violin music)

6 hours of my life I will never get back.

And I agree Gordon, we(Canucks) would NEVER carve a dead animal on the table..maybe in a quanset or barn, but the table is just poor manners!

bshabu · Joined: 03 Apr 2003 Posts: 200 Location: Kumagaya

Mine was a couple of weeks ago, but in my case I work in a kindergarten. So it was mostly women. This one was PTA enkai. Same boring speech after speech, but only from women. After the nijikai was what? Yes, Karaoke. All in all, it was good fun.

I've had interesting Enkai stories in the past. The best story was when I was working at a JHS. At the enkai, the lunch lady (infamous for her love of drink), ask me to take the other, much younger and single, lunch lady to a love hotel. Then she added if I preferred older women, that she would give me a good price.

I didn't know what to say. The JTE that was next to her told me just to say 'maybe next time'.

shmooj · Joined: 11 Sep 2003 Posts: 1758 Location: Seoul, ROK

My wife and I are heading out to an overnight bounenkai on the 30th. I have to say that if you actually know the people well, a bounenkai can be one of the best events of the year. We have known the group we are going with for about two years and we are really looking forward to it. It's not all that bad sometimes you know...

fat_chris · Joined: 10 Sep 2003 Posts: 3198 Location: Beijing

Spike · Joined: 12 Dec 2003 Posts: 9 Location: Fukuoka, Japan

I used to hate bonenkais with a passion. What I do now is dress up in a Santa outfit and feign drunkenness. This loosens up the J.s considerably, and steers them away from the usual asinine questions. I have a much better time and so do they. Also, every year at least a couple women get real 'close and friendly' to Santa, which gives him wood (not the stuff at the bottom of the chimney).

ntropy · Joined: 11 Oct 2003 Posts: 671 Location: ghurba

Bshabu,

Where in Gifu do you teach, Gifu city or outside of the capital? I worked in Gifu city 2 years and Seki 3. Be interesting to compare stories.

cangel · Joined: 12 May 2003 Posts: 74 Location: Jeonju, South Korea

I remember my first bonenkai as a JET. I was told the party would cost Y4000 but when I got there they told me I had to pay Y10000. I asked why and they said that the other teachers all pay into a enkai fund each month and that I had never made a contribution. This is the first I had heard of such a "fund". Anyway, it was too late to back out so I coughed up the man and went in to enjoy the festivities. Very traditional was the event with all the sashimi one could eat only to be washed down but hot sake and too many beers to count. The beers I didn't mind but to have paid a man for about 7 beers was a tad pricey for me. The greatest thing about enkais is being able to just about get away with anything. That's an entirely different story, probably not suitable for this board, involving me and several grabby JTEs...

guest of Japan · Joined: 28 Feb 2003 Posts: 1601 Location: Japan

I had mine about a week ago. My school has lots of money, so we went to an onsen hotel in Choshi, Chiba. The onsen was great, the food was good, but the experience was miserable. My school is wicked conservative. The only people who have fun are the high level folk because everyone who is under 40 is running around pouring drinks and grovelling. I got to listen to the very drunk owner of my high school tell one of the Japanese teachers his opinion of foreigners. The Japanese teachers response, "Demo, Mark wa nice gaijin."

The sad thing is that I really like Enkais, but the officially sanctioned ones for my school are unbearable. Most of the time I was left alone as I don't have a place in the hierarchy. I was bored out of my skull.

Gordon · Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Posts: 5309 Location: Japan

They were probably right about the fund. I get 1,000 yen taken out of my cheque every month for the bonenkai. It's sure not worth it.

homersimpson · Joined: 14 Feb 2003 Posts: 569 Location: Kagoshima

My club's bonenkai with the students (on one end of the room) and the parents (on the other). After the usual speeches from hell, including my obligatory kanpai offering, and drinking that ensued, a pair of the tipsy mothers invited me to their table. I was entering unchartered territory here; 18 (mostly blasted) mothers, peering at me and launching rapid-fire questions at me. Most of them the usual regarding girlfriends, marriage, kids, how much my rent is (huh?), etc. One of the mothers proceeded to ask me which of the mothers at the table was "my type?" In order to avoid a potential riot, I simply said all of them. Later, one of the mothers "offered" her 13-year-old daughter as a possible solution to any marital woes I may be having. I know she was just joking, but it was still disturbing.

unchi pants · Joined: 20 Dec 2003 Posts: 64

... And actually wasn't as horrific as I anticipated.

And yes, of course shmooj, any party with good friends is usually fun... I was referring to the unwanted forced company bonenkai.

... But in the end it turned out fine. It's amazing what alcohol can do. I did start to panic though, at one stage, when my co-worker spoke about her previous karaoke experience with shacho... A 50 year old ex-army officer (with the strongest accent you've ever heard) doing a rendition of that old classic "Oops I did it again" ... A 50 year old shacho doing Britney Spears! YA DA! Fortunately luck was on my side, and just as we were leaving, shacho had a phone call. I couldn't believe my luck! He had to go into another room to take the call. This was my getaway... I hot-footed it down the fire escape and out the door of the hotel and made a bee line for the nearest subway...

As I'm running down the footpath there were shouts from some of the ojisan salarymen (also on the run from the shacho karaoke experience) of "Unchi pantsu san... NIJIKAI!!" Yikes! The wife and kiddies are waiting for me ... Sumimasen ne.

But we thought you weren't married ... ?

Oh well. At least it's over for another year.

Unchi Pants