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[missieUAE]

Okay guys, I checked the Search function and did not find this question asked previously, but if it has been, I'm counting on you to help me find where, because I swear I looked!

I'm reading a book called "Culture Smart: UAE." It's a pretty small book that professes itself to be "The Essential Guide to Customs & Culture." Here is an excerpt from the section "Attitudes Towards Women":

"A man in the same place as a woman to whom he is not directly related or married will find himself subject to restriction, but women are free to move about in public only with a suitable chaperone. A single woman is likely to encounter difficulties if she wishes to visit a restaurant or shopping mall alone, join an exercise or social club or, sometimes, drive a car or walk down a public street. This does not happen all the time, but abuse may be encountered, or police or other security personnel may wish to question the woman concerned. This is usually an unpleasant or intimidating experience at best, and may result in detention at worst. Considering these possibilities, most women are advised to walk in public cautiously in terms of dress and attitude, and to be accompanied by other people, preferably men, who may reasonably be held to be their legitimate chaperones."

That entire paragraph, as far as I could tell, was talking about expectations for both foreign and Emirati women in the UAE.

However, when I was in Dubai for a few days last summer, I was a single woman, traveling alone, and didn't even see a hint of any of these "restrictions." Was I just blissfully ignorant? Lucky? About to be taken to some sort of religious prison if I didn't find a man to start walking around with? I seriously can't tell. I wasn't tromping around town in a bikini or anything, but I went to malls, movies, and restaurants by myself, without any problem.

What is your personal experience with this issue in the UAE?

[veiledsentiments]

[missieUAE]

That was sort of my suspicion. I'm kind of inclined to throw the whole book away, actually, having read about half of it. It seems like it's been copied word-for-word from old brochures about Muslims and the Gulf.

The part about women that I quoted reminded me of cautions I've heard about women in Saudi Arabia, but it was so contrary to what I experienced in my own (admittedly brief) visit to the UAE that I figured either it was very wrong or I was seriously offending everyone the whole time I was there by wandering about without a proper chaperone!

[mishmumkin]

Ditto what VS said.


Using Abu Dhabi as an example (not Dubai...which is infinitely more "liberal" than the other emirates), you won't feel unsafe in 99% of the city. I would advise you to observe local tradtions of modesty and cover your legs to mid-calf and arms to the elbow when you're out and about walking the city. You won't feel unsafe as much as you'll feel uncomfortable when you walk down electra street on a Friday afternoon.

Go to the beach or the beach club, and you can relax the dress code. However, I've got to say that my biggest pet peeve in returning to the uAE is seeing the foreigners who absolutely do not give a cr*p about what's expected. The ones who show up at LuLu's Supermarket in skirts that barely make it to mid-thigh, or the mall in their bathing suit and cover up. My students (Emirati females) commented on the number of women they saw in the mall in shorts and mini-skirts. They notice the blatant disregard for the local tradition of modesty.

[mousette]

I have lived in the region for the past 4 years and I am rone to going everywhere by myself. In addition, I love my long walks and one of the reasons I love to live here is I feel safe walking anywhere, anytime of day. I dress conservatively but fashionably. Aside from a few cat-calls from young men driving by, I have encountered no problems. There was one occasion when a colleague (Arab woman) who lived in the same building as me could not understand what I was doing when I left the building by myself and went to the president of the university complaining about it. I was questioned and I informed the president that I was only going for a long walk, nothing culturally inappropriate was happening, and basically told them that my walks are my private time and NONE of anyone else's business. The issue was closed and the woman was told to mind her own business. That was the only disturbing experience I had.

[Zoot]

Well not being a woman myself, I can't directly comment on how women may feel. However, just today I too saw a woman in LuLu who barely had her top half covered and the bottom half only to the knees! Didn't see anyone interested in carting her off to prison. I believe peope here are less at risk than in western countries. It sounds like you may have been reading about Saudi Arabia rather than the UAE!!!

[adorabilly]

MissieUAE

According to my wife, that quote must be from something about 10 years old.

The women here (even in RAK) are free to come and go as they please. There are no restrictions on driving or going places, doing business.

Now, I would suggest dressing modestly (especially at work), and then being aware of what you are wearing when leaving your house to go out in public. You will run across your students (and often their parents too) out in public, and do you really want to say Hi, to that nice little emiratee girls dad wearing a halter top that you are falling out of, and a tight pair of shorts?

As for being unsafe... My wife (and most of the women I know here in the UAE) say they feel very safe, but sometimes rather uncomfortable especially if there are groups of young men around. I have heard that it isn't just for emirates, but including the working indian/pakistani men who will stare at you. so it all depends on the place, and your tolerance levels.

I would suggest you follow any of the safety rules you know from home. Don't go into the dark places with large groups of men you don't know, be aware of your surroundings, etc...

[veiledsentiments]

[mishmumkin]

Missie: No one will likely cart you off to prison (at least not in 6 of the 7 emirates ) for dressing in skimpy clothing, but that shouldn't be your motivation for dressing modestly. Rspect for local culture and the desire to to ward of staring men should really be what's behind that decision.

[Nordic]

[helenl]

I believe Mishmumkin is referring to Sharjah - where, after 9/11 a brochure was issued concerning what was allowed and disallowed dress for women. It included a statement concerning wearing sarees in public to the effect that the woman's stomach should not be on display. As for western dress, sleeves to the elbow, dresses below the knee and no tight, clingy or see through fabrics.

2 years ago a sign had to be removed from the streets - it was concerning a beauty contest. I did not see the sign but understand it was your basic, beauty contest beauty wearing something beauty contestants wear (skimpy but not pornographic).

[mishmumkin]

[Sheikh N Bake]

My wife, an attractive young Chinese, was never NOT followed and/or hit on in Dubai when she was out alone or with a woman friend.

[773]

[mishmumkin]

If your Chinese wife was not bothered by men, then I say she was quite fortunate.

My friends and colleagues with Japanese wives have all received some sort of propositioning: some even in the presence of their husbands. If it's not the prostitution assumption, it's the nanny one. As a blonde who lived in Sharjah in the late 90s, I can relate to that. If I was referred to as a Russian one more time...