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JZer
Joined: 16 Jan 2005
Posts: 3898
Location: Pittsburgh
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 Posted: Sun Jul 12, 2009 11:49 pm Post subject: |
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| While I wouldn-t marry for a passport or residency, hindsight is 20 20 and all I can say is that if you marry someone from a different country, you better have a serious talk about where you-re going to live before you get married. |
I would also add that if you are planning to marry someone and live in another country you should clearly think about what kind of work you are going to do. If you are not completely in love with teaching EFL then you need to tread carefully about the future.
In some countries you will have to learn the local language very well before you could possible do other kinds of work. |
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naturegirl321
Joined: 04 May 2003
Posts: 9041
Location: home sweet home
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| Posted: Wed Jul 15, 2009 12:10 am Post subject: |
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| Very well said. I think I-m ready to make the transition out of EFL. I-m hoping to go some place, teach EFL for a couple of years, load up on cash and in the meantime, my husband has agreed to study for an online degree and take care of the kids, when they come. IN exchange, we-ll be going to Europe for me to study for an MA in Interior Design. That being said, it-ll probably take about 5 or 6 years for all this to happen |
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JZer
Joined: 16 Jan 2005
Posts: 3898
Location: Pittsburgh
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| Posted: Wed Jul 15, 2009 1:22 am Post subject: |
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| I would also add that if you are planning to marry someone and live in another country you should clearly think about what kind of work you are going to do. If you are not completely in love with teaching EFL then you need to tread carefully about the future. |
Which is why I would probably never consider marrying a Taiwanese woman unless she was willing to move to another country with me. I don't mind teaching EFL but the major appeal to it is that I don't plan on doing it for the rest of my life.
Not to mention that teaching EFL is more of a means to support my Chinese studies and possibly support studying for a M.A. in Taiwanese studies. |
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missjones
Joined: 02 Mar 2009
Posts: 23
Location: Florida
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| Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 1:00 am Post subject: |
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Thanks for the kind advice, though to be honest we've already made up our minds about it.
I was mostly curious whether other TEFLers have faced similar dilemmas - and apparently they have.
As for my solution, as my time here winds down I've found that it's best not to think about it. |
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GambateBingBangBOOM
Joined: 04 Nov 2003
Posts: 2021
Location: Japan
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| Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 2:40 am Post subject: |
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| JZer wrote: |
In some countries you will have to learn the local language very well before you could possible do other kinds of work. |
I would say that that's almost all countries, including our own. There are sometimes other work areas that don't require local language skills (like 'banking' in Japan- I guess it must be international banking).
Another option of course is to open your own small business. |
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hydrogonian
Joined: 21 Feb 2006
Posts: 18
Location: cloud 5
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| Posted: Wed Aug 05, 2009 2:21 pm Post subject: Re: Keep your chin up!!! |
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| Great_Leader_of_ESL wrote: |
The upside is that there are quite a few pretty girls in Seoul, and after a divorce and subsequently losing two children in a car crash, I don't develop that much of an attachment to people. IF I do have to end things, it won't be so bad. |
Thats extemely rough about your kids. Ive experienced a bunch of death, although not with my children(I dont have any), and it will give you a different take on relationships. People come and go, enjoy them while they are there, but at some point you will part ways. Be it buy death, decision, or other circumstance. You never know when any of these reasons will manifest. Therefore, it is easier emotionally not to get attached. However, sometimes I wish I could meet someone to inspire me enough to become emotionally sensitive again in this way. Being hurt sucks, but not feeling anything sucks to.
And really, I feel that you only ever get to see the tip of the iceburg when you think that you know someone. Therefore, there are always all kinds of cute surprises waiting for you even years after the relationship starts. Marriage is feeling like a stranger and stranger concept for me. Either I pick the weird ones, or everyone is weird. Or Im weird. Any way you cut it, it is extremely difficult to find that person who you want to legally attach yourself to for an indefinite period of time. A person who essentially remains a stranger to you, really. |
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JZer
Joined: 16 Jan 2005
Posts: 3898
Location: Pittsburgh
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| Posted: Wed Aug 05, 2009 9:24 pm Post subject: |
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| A person who essentially remains a stranger to you, really. |
Maybe one essentially remains a stranger to themselves as well. |
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