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James_T_Kirk
Joined: 20 Sep 2003
Posts: 357
Location: Ten Forward
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 Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 12:39 am Post subject: |
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| I am sure I won't get answers to my questions until that 'moment' in the future arises that explains why I did everything that I did, but I hope other people have these same fears and doubts and that I am not alone |
As you can see, you are definitely not alone! I am chucking my stable life as a good consumer in the States this summer to get back to teaching TEFL abroad. Do I question whether or not this is a good move? Hell yeah I do, but I know I have to follow my heart if I want to be truly happy with my life.
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Perhaps it's not just stability that's lacking. We were all raised and indoctrinated to consume. Western civilisation is dependent on the myth that the one who dies with the most stuff wins. By galavanting around the globe we're shirking our 'responsibilities'.
Our contribution to the economic well being of our countries is to work 9 to 5, go home and sit amongst our extensive collection of fine consumer durables and watch TV (our obligation in order to be told what to buy) so that we can choose our next major purchase.
But in reality all we need is food, shelter and a tribe (family, friends, lovers etc.).
Most people seem to want everyone else to live in the same manner as themselves. They feel threatened by anyone that chooses differently. It's only our knowledge and experiences that are truly our own - everything else is just 'stuff'.
Never forget that our critics won't be there if we wake up one morning and realise we've wasted our lives watching TV and working, or even worse, trying to meet other people's expectations. |
I agree with CG, this is the best post I have read on Dave's for a long time.
Cheers,
Kirk |
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Shaman
Joined: 06 Apr 2003
Posts: 446
Location: Hammertown
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 12:39 am Post subject: |
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I couldn't agree more. Cheers, aramas.
Shaman |
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khmerhit
Joined: 31 May 2003
Posts: 1874
Location: Reverse Culture Shock Unit
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 1:17 am Post subject: |
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| Someone has been trainspotting... |
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struelle
Joined: 16 May 2003
Posts: 2372
Location: Shanghai
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 3:48 am Post subject: |
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I can empathise, but I can't say it's a normal thing at all.
You are fleeing from yourself and from committing yourself to your home country and its society. You refuse to identify 100% with any community. Being the guest of a foreign nation is preferable because you don't have to embrace everything they go for - warts and everything, while you are still free to enjoy what's so good there..
I call this 'civilisation fatigue'. |
I can understand this Roger, but wouldn't this also apply to your situation? From reading your stuff, you've been living in foreign countries a lot longer than most people here. Also, you have more experience, not to mention the highest number of posts on this board.
In light of this, it's a bit upsetting when you make (imho) a discouraging commment to the OP who is naturally questioning her purpose in life while working abroad. Surely you've asked these questions too at some point. Moreover your lengthy experience in China, which is not your home country, tends to lessen the credibility of your statement.
On the other hand, all these years teaching abroad may justify your statement if you feel that civilization fatigue applies to you as well.
Steve |
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once again
Joined: 27 Jan 2003
Posts: 815
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:01 am Post subject: |
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"It's only our knowledge and experiences that are truly our own - everything else is just 'stuff'. "
I could not agree more with this comment. It was what made we leave in the first place. Everything that I had worked for, house etc., dissapeared when my relationship broke up. I took the money and decided that the only thing that I could not lose was my experiences and memories. I feel I have far more now than I ever did before just because of that. |
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waxwing
Joined: 29 Jun 2003
Posts: 719
Location: China
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:57 am Post subject: |
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"I have always been fascinated by the law of reversed effort. Sometimes I call it the 'backwards law'. When you try to stay on the surface of the water, you sink; but when you try to sink, you float. When you hold your breath, you lose it - which immediately calls to mind an ancient and much neglected saying, 'Whoever would save his soul shall lose it."
From the preface to "The Wisdom of Insecurity", Alan Watts 1951 |
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rossiter joe
Joined: 28 Jan 2004
Posts: 25
Location: Gunma, Japan
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| Posted: Fri Mar 26, 2004 12:00 pm Post subject: |
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What is it that some people alway say? "If only I had ........" If I could go back ten years, I would have ......", "I should have .......".
I don`t think I will look back when I`m old and say " I wish I would have stayed at home. I wish I would have worked more. I wish I hadn`t travelled." |
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Nobuhle
Joined: 14 Apr 2003
Posts: 17
Location: Xi'an, China
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| Posted: Sat Mar 27, 2004 2:58 am Post subject: |
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Thank you so much to everyone who responded to my post. When I wrote it, I think I already knew the answers to my questions, but I just needed to know that I wasn't alone. For the last year and a half, I have slowly been believing that it is OK not to have a plan and just to live my life the way I want to. But everyone once and a while, I need reminding of this.
I am feeling much better about myself and my decisions now. Thank you for your support and encouragment.
Erica |
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