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Wives in KSA
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Green Acres



Joined: 06 May 2009
Posts: 260

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 10:33 am    Post subject: Wives in KSA Reply with quote

I was reading, with interest, the expressions of some responsible posters, and don't even get any big ideas that it was any of the usual suspects, concerning foreign wives in the KSA. The conversation was "crashed" by the usual suspects into something about terrorism, and while I can understand the links...(read, "My wife is a terrorist and other sordid stories")...the conversation is locked?

I want to know more about Jumeriah Jane and Kompound Kathy. Sounds like world war radio personalities. Haven't they existed since the first days of colonialism? Isn't that where the tradition of tea at 3 comes from? Sounds like these people have a great life, despite the antipathy of a few. I wouldn't mind having a maid, or two; playing tennis all day, and enjoying a few rounds with my mates everysingledayoftheweek!! Would you, really?

And on a side note, is it really that bad a place for women to live and have a life?
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scot47



Joined: 10 Jan 2003
Posts: 15343

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 11:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It can be - but the number of jobs allowing a comfortable lifestyle to teachers is a lot less than it used to be !
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veiledsentiments



Joined: 20 Feb 2003
Posts: 17644
Location: USA

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 3:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Wives in KSA Reply with quote

Green Acres wrote:
And on a side note, is it really that bad a place for women to live and have a life?

While many people like the lifestyle and cope with the restrictions, it depends very much on where you are and with whom the working spouse is contracted.

In my years working around the Gulf, I worked with many people whose first job was in Saudi... mostly in what is called around here "the good old days." While there was a couple that met and fell in love there... and thus had very happy memories of the place, the general consensus was that none of them would ever go back... and the most common reason why not was because their wives hated it. (not because they hated it) Even the Arab wives hated it. More than one man told me that their wives had informed them that they would divorce them before they would return to Saudi. When I was first in Oman, one American fellow put me on the phone to talk his wife into coming by assuring her that it was nothing like Saudi (where I had never been... Cool ). They had been in Riyadh for years and she hated every minute of it. But it was to assure her that I could drive and not wear an abaya and how safe and pleasant Oman was. (BTW, she came to Oman, loved it, and they are still there) What I heard through the years was what convinced me to NOT take a job there.

We probably have a number of posters on this board whose marriage crashed and burned in Saudi. How much life there was the cause of the divorce is, of course, open to debate. Laughing

The key is your wife and your relationship, of course. She needs to be warned of the mine fields and given some input into the final decision to go there. And knowledge that she also has input about when you get out.

VS
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Cleopatra



Joined: 28 Jun 2003
Posts: 3657
Location: Tuamago Archipelago

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Sounds like these people have a great life, despite the antipathy of a few. I wouldn't mind having a maid, or two; playing tennis all day, and enjoying a few rounds with my mates everysingledayoftheweek!! Would you, really?


Personally, I can think of no worse fate than being 'a wife' whether in KSA or anywhere else in the world.

But yes, for those of a certain disposition, 'compound life' certainly has its perks. Many people become so spoilt by it that they cannot contemplate going home, despite the obvious restrictions of Saudi life. There are many cases of people leaving KSA, swearing that they're well rid of the place and will never come back, and within a year or so.... there they are back again, often in the same job they left not so long ago. Life in the 'real world' was just too harsh.

BTW in my seven years here I don't think I've been witness to one marriage breakdown. And I would say that if it does happen here, it was sooner or later probably going to happen anyway.
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lazycomputerkids



Joined: 22 Sep 2009
Posts: 360
Location: Tabuk

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cleopatra wrote:
Personally, I can think of no worse fate than being 'a wife' whether in KSA or anywhere else in the world.
I think I just fell in love with you.
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Never Ceased To Be Amazed



Joined: 22 Oct 2004
Posts: 3500
Location: Shhh...don't talk to me...I'm playin' dead...

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 6:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Get a cyber-motel room, you two...

NCTBA
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007



Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 2684
Location: UK/Veteran of the Magic Kingdom

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 7:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Personally, I can think of no worse fate than being 'a wife' whether in KSA or anywhere else in the world.

That's why men pay to stay married and women pay to get divorced! Laughing

A woman without a husband is like a fish without water!
(VS, yes I know, the feminists will fire their missiles towards me! Laughing )
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Cleopatra



Joined: 28 Jun 2003
Posts: 3657
Location: Tuamago Archipelago

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 7:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
A woman without a husband is like a fish without water!
(VS, yes I know, the feminists will fire their missile towards me!


Nah, they'll just refer to the numerous surveys which have consistently shown that while men report higher levels of happiness after marriage, the opposite is true for women, who report higher levels of happiness before marriage.
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lazycomputerkids



Joined: 22 Sep 2009
Posts: 360
Location: Tabuk

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2009 11:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A one-track mind, NCTB has it.

Cleopatra's statement on marriage stirred the cobwebs of my university days with readings of Kate Chopin coinciding with the release of Thelma & Louise. Chopin achieved literary notarity while raising a large family and yet The Awakening was written 8 years before her death, when her discretion and abilities were powerful and mature. The Awakening presents a young woman weighing the qualities of life offered by acceptable societal roles-- the protoganist, starved by the limits of her choices, drowns. A purposeful ambiguity of the novel's end, as to whether the protagonist has comitted suicide, commented to broader, less dramatic acts of self-destruction among women.

In the final scenes of Thelma & Louise, the word awake is repeatedly exchanged between the primary characters before they are finally confronted at a precipice.

The central question posed being: Given the choices offered to women by most tradition, what choice does a woman have?
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007



Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Posts: 2684
Location: UK/Veteran of the Magic Kingdom

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 12:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

lazycomputerkids wrote:
The central question posed being: Given the choices offered to women by most tradition, what choice does a woman have?

Well, given the complexity and inter-disciplinary of different traditions, the best option for a 'free' woman is to get married, raise children, and participate in the human progress. All other scenarios are only in Hollywood films! Laughing
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veiledsentiments



Joined: 20 Feb 2003
Posts: 17644
Location: USA

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 2:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

007 wrote:
the best option for a 'free' woman is to get married, raise children, and participate in the human progress.

If the only option of a "free" woman is to completely throw the freedom away... I prefer the drowning...

VS
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lazycomputerkids



Joined: 22 Sep 2009
Posts: 360
Location: Tabuk

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 2:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

007 wrote:
lazycomputerkids wrote:
The central question posed being: Given the choices offered to women by most tradition, what choice does a woman have?

Well, given the complexity and inter-disciplinary of different traditions, the best option for a 'free' woman is to get married, raise children, and participate in the human progress. All other scenarios are only in Hollywood films! :lol:
Troll Spy Kitteh 6/10
I agree with troll spy kitteh if troll spy kitteh haz cheezburger
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 3:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear lazycomputerkids,

If I might make a suggestion, perhaps agent provocateur or, better yet, devil's advocate, might be a more appropriate phrase than "troll spy kitteh."

Regards,
John
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lazycomputerkids



Joined: 22 Sep 2009
Posts: 360
Location: Tabuk

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 3:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

johnslat wrote:
Dear lazycomputerkids,
If I might make a suggestion, perhaps agent provocateur or, better yet, devil's advocate, might be a more appropriate phrase than "troll spy kitteh."
Regards,
John

Dear John
http://icanhascheezburger.com/
Not all trolls are bad. Agitation is a synonym of breadth.
6/10 rated my opinion of its efficacy.
I haven't trolled since 1999, on AOL, when it was being over-run by sex agents. Actual villains are so much fun to tease online. It took police departments years to match pace with geeks. I appreciate your concern.
Cordially,
lazycomputerkids
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johnslat



Joined: 21 Jan 2003
Posts: 13859
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2009 4:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dear lazycomputerkids,

Thanks for the link - it reminded me of the "Demotivators" - Increasing Success by Lowering Expectations - created by despair.com that I like so much:


Here's the text for "TRADITION," but the images add to the pleasure:


TRADITION
Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.

I chose "TRADITION," well. because this IS the Saudi forum.

http://www.despair.com/viewall.html

Regards,
John
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