Job Discussion Forums

flyingscotsman · Joined: 24 Mar 2010 Posts: 339 Location: Suzhou, China

I have read these forums a few times and managed to get some good advice from others more experienced than me.

This recent situation happened in the small town of Taizhou, Jiangsu where I live.

This is a pretty small town with a few colleges and training schools and basically usually quiet.

In the school next to mine there is an MOD EDIT guy who is ALWAYS drunk and openly shagging one of his students. There was a big ruckus with the school and then they changed the housing rule to no more students allowed in the teachers dorm.

The MOD EDIT teacher got really drunk this past weekend and beat the living hell out of the girl student in a nearby hotel. She was hurt pretty bad and of course is now terrified of him. He pummeled her face repeatedly and tossed her on the floor. I saw the marks, her face is pretty bad.

Seems now the issue is what should I do as a fellow teacher about this situation. While I am not the upholder of common standards for China
this is the type of fellow that makes it bad for all of us who want to live in this country.

Its no secret the school will not renew him but should I speak to the fao of his school? Our fear is that he will get drunk again and maybe kill her next time. She's only 20 and of course defensive of his actions saying its her fault.

Being new to this setting what should I do? In a western country the guy would be behind bars but here in China no one seems to care about her.

Am I wasting my time her getting involved?

Zero · Joined: 08 Sep 2004 Posts: 1402

Don't be daft. When her face has already been pummeled and is "pretty bad," do you think the FAO needs you to come explain that the guy is dangerous? If you did so, do you think it would make any difference whatsoever in how the FAO handled things? Not sure if you're new to China altogether or just to this particular school setting, but just to cover all the bases, let me lay it out for you: No, it wouldn't.

You have no standing in this situation and, as far as I know, no special knowledge or insight that would be helpful anyway. That would true no matter what country it happened in. The girl can figure out not to go near him. The FAO can figure out how to discipline him and whether to renew his contract. The girl-beater can shuffle off to some other school. But you aren't able to do anything. Just keep a low profile, stay sober, do your job.

LarssonCrew · Joined: 06 Jun 2009 Posts: 1308

Actually, in the UK at least, a complaint can be made by anyone to claim a beating upon a female, so the OP could have affected the situation if it where in the UK.

flyingscotsman · Joined: 24 Mar 2010 Posts: 339 Location: Suzhou, China

The FT has serious issues. No one likes him. One of his closest friends slept with slept with his girlfriend before he beat the hell out of her. This is not secret, the guy that slept with his girl told everyone, then when the drunken MOD EDIT found out he beat the girl.

It's Taizhou in Jiangsu, not really near Hangzhou.

Most of us stay away from the MOD EDIT because he's unstable and always drunk.

His girlfriend is no angel and has messed around with some of his friends behind his back but she's still only 20 and we worry he will hurt her again.

The situation is hurting the other teachers because we are being associated by his actions.

A'Moo · Posted: Thu Mar 25, 2010 9:41 pm Post subject:

Sounds as though the emphasis is on MOD EDIT in the OP's posts. Is that really all that relevant here?
Cant comment on the locale in the OP, but must say, in the 6 or 7 locales that I have habituated in China, if an FT were violent towards anyone, authorities would be involved. While I disagree with those who talk of China and its schools "clamping down" on unqualified FT's w/o work permits (most FT's I know of here are HS grads, at best), there does seem to be a better quality of HS grad/backpacker types here teaching now-not the drunk tank types of yesteryear...

daCabbie · Joined: 02 Sep 2007 Posts: 244

Have you tried talking to this guy? Ask him to explain, in his opinion, what is going on? Try to reason with him. Try to help him see the errors of his way.

Don't become obsessed with his life or hers. Here in China the hardest thing to deal with is the boredom. I often find myself obsessed with the smallest events because I have nothing else to do with myself. I suffer from a lack of Soap Opera's. I am not implying this is the case with you.

Always remember this world has a way of correcting what is wrong. This guy is gonna go to a brothel one night and pull this crap on some working girl. He will then learn what it means to get a beat down from some angry pimp. The type of justice that a FAO or the police can deliver is not the type of justice that will change this person. Life will be the final judge in his world and it will deliver him more pain than he dealt out.

Take a deep breath and let your own anger go. You are a good person with good intentions. Concentrate your energy on helping the people in this world who want your help.

kukiv · Joined: 13 Dec 2009 Posts: 328

vikeologist · Joined: 07 Sep 2009 Posts: 600

Unfortunately violence against women seems to be tolerated in China, not least by the women themselves. I presume that the OP is a male, in which case it may be helpful (if possible) to find a female mutual aquaintance to talk to the victim. Someone who has been in a similar situation may be particularly helpful, but all you can do is provide the young woman with information, advice and support that will empower her.

I appreciate that she may be in danger here, and nothing would please me more than for the OP to report that the abuser has been thrown out of the country, but let's be honest; in practice no good is going to come of the OP intervening. It would be nice if the victim were to decide to notify the Police herself, but you can't make people's decisions for them.

My personal attitude is zero tolerance. If another man is violent towards women I will cut them off dead, but I don't go around telling other people that they should do the same. I don't believe that abusers need a sympathetic ear. They have a psychological problem, but I'm not a trained psychologist, though I'd be more than happy to find one for them if they have enough self-knowledge to recognise their need.

The Great Wall of Whiner · Joined: 29 Jan 2003 Posts: 4946 Location: Blabbing

I would take the girl to the police station and have her make a report and then make a copy and fax it to the embassy of the guy's country.

But that's just me.

mrwslee003 · Joined: 14 Nov 2009 Posts: 190

Whiner has a good idea!

Call the drunk's native embassy and report him for his own good. However, I don't know if they can do anything either, but it 's worth a try.

I mean the girl may have asked for it by being disloyal to her boy friend.
However, he can just give her the dear John letter. He must have self
esteem problems not knowing what to do with a tramp like her.

I mean, in China a decent guy can have umpteen women going after
him. Its a man's world in China, a good man that is.

All good men must do something, otherwise the bad ones will create
a bad reputation for all men.

Jayray · Joined: 28 Feb 2009 Posts: 373 Location: Back East

mrwslee003 · Joined: 14 Nov 2009 Posts: 190

Good ideas Jay!

As I said: Good men must do something otherwise the bad ones.....

I'll shut my trap for now.

daCabbie · Joined: 02 Sep 2007 Posts: 244

Talk to the FAO.

Talk to the police.

Talk to the victim.

Talk to the student.

Talk to the offender

Document everything.

DO NOT take the law into your own hands. This is for your own safety.

I want to see this guy pay as much as everyone else, but you should go through all the rational steps before you go 'off the reservation.'

Good Luck and let us know if there is anything we can do to help you.

Please remember suggesting violence on an open forum is a criminal offense in some countries (maybe even in China).

kukiv · Joined: 13 Dec 2009 Posts: 328

this thread is getting funny - what a load of limp-wristed suggestions!!!!

If the school aren't acting - then its either because they haven't been informed or are hitting the lowest levels of FT standards and student protection imaginable.

And then comes your own protection - the OP sounds a tad nervous of this violent drunk, in his situation I'd also be getting tad nervous of how the students and CT's were going to react and treat the other FT's.

In this employment environment I'd have to paid a huge amount of money to stay on - but I'm pretty sure we're talking about yet another 4000/month dive, that will take on any walking white body - no wonder standards in the FT game become so low.

Fellow teachers sharing their students in bed, alcoholism and violence from male teachers against female students and fears that a drunk FT may turn on his FT colleagues - wonder what it takes for some to say, well if the school doesn't do something about this, that's enough, and I'm off Idea

The solution to this problem is the school - make sure they know whats going on - and if they don't fire the drunk, fire yourself!!!!

Silent Shadow