Job Discussion Forums

stefanreynolds · Joined: 12 Mar 2010 Posts: 34

I love it when people dismiss things in such a fleeting manner, and respond as if they know best. It shows a considerable lack of understanding in my opinion and perhaps an inabilty to do so. Also, Im certain vanity plays a part. Anyway, the foremost part of wisdom is acknowledging one's lack of it.

To the Op: get yourself a boyfriend.

RollingStone · Joined: 19 Jan 2009 Posts: 138

The issue of whether something is a case of sexual harrassment aside, the thing that seems to stand out to me is the degree of isolation you express in your circumstances. Yes, there are certainly various ways to handle the situation. You may contact legal authorities and go that route; you can simply walk away; you can put on the brave face and feel demeaned and grow some bitter callouses. Or you may attempt to manipulate some guy into a "relationship" with you so you can intimidate the boss that taught you some dirty words. The question I see as most relevant is - how do you want to live your life? Do you want to grow as an adult, deal with situations such as this creatively and proactively? Do you want to have independence? As so far only starteacher has suggested, another route to a possible solution is for you to get involved with relationships outside of work. One obvious reason is because emotional attachments make life worthwhile, but another is because you need a support group for situations like this one. These relationships will empower you much more effectively, in the short and especially in the long-term. It seems telling that you are casting a net into an anonymous web forum, thinking complete and anonymous strangers, projecting their own biases into a vaguely described scenario, will be able to provide you with a satisfactory solution, much less tools for a richer life.

Piri-Piri · Joined: 23 Mar 2010 Posts: 24 Location: Osaka

TokyoLiz · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Posts: 1548 Location: Tokyo, Japan

stefanreynolds · Joined: 12 Mar 2010 Posts: 34

the problem with lefty-liberals is that they very good at over complicating issues at the expense of neglecting straight forward, effective solutions. Sexual harrassment is not a uniquely Japanese thing, I almost feel embarassed for having to point this out!
It happens across the globe, and having a boyfriend almost always does the trick. and, besides having a boyfriend can be fun. Try it, you might like it! Wink

Piri-Piri · Joined: 23 Mar 2010 Posts: 24 Location: Osaka

seklarwia · Posted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:03 am Post subject:

TokyoLiz · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Posts: 1548 Location: Tokyo, Japan

stefanreynolds,

The comments you've posted were insensitive to other posters who were facing issues about keeping a lid on the fact that they have same sex partners.

Now, you're giving questionable advice to a person who is facing sexual harassment in the workplace.

To make your advice even more suspect, you've indicated in previous posts that you are not resident in Japan (as has been noticed by others who've posted in this thread).

I'm not going to address your points again. They're irrelevant, uninformed, and unhelpful.

Go away.

Seklarwia, you brought up a good point here about harassers escalating things when you have a man in your life.

I'm almost never bothered in the street, but to my dismay, I have been insulted, and my companion insulted, when walking hand in hand with my dates. One was a Japanese guy a bit older than me, and a jacka$$ said something really nasty to him. Recently, me and my American boyfriend who's blond and blue-eyed has been the target of unpleasant comments and unwanted attention.

But my neighbours, friends and local merchants are happy I have a guy in my life.

Be safe!

It's important not to let a small minority of jerks colour your experience.