Job Discussion Forums

[steviok85]

I have seen quite a bit in my time as a teacher in several eastern European countries. However, an incident last week was quite horrific. Has anybody ever been in a lesson/break between a lesson and had one of their students receive some devastating news, such as a best friend dying? I let her go outside to answer a call - which I would not normally do, but she is 18.
I didn't know the girl who had died, but was slightly rocked to see my student fly down the stairs and exit the building in tears. I found out a week later what had happened.

[johnslat]

Dear steviok85,

Not a student - but I received such news, back in 1982 in Jeddah. Between classes, I opened my mail and found out that one of my best friends had died - committed suicide in Perth, Australia. He was only about thirty at the time.

I had just enough time to go to the men's room and cry for a while before my next class began.

Regards,
John

[naturegirl321]

I had a student walk in late to class once and jokingly scolded him. Students told me that it was his birthday and right before I was able to say happy birthday they rush to tell me that he had just been robbed at knife point a couple blocks from school. They took the new shoes he had gotten from his birthday.

It's hard to know what to do when something like that happens. I told him he could go home, but he stayed. Class stopped for a bit, but then it went on.

It's hard. I'd give them the option to leave or call a friend, but in the end it seemed like he just wanted life to go on and get back to normal and the best way of doing that was continuing with the lesson.

Another thing happened, but to a teacher. A friend of mine was calling into the director's and told that her contract woudln't be re-newed. 10 minutes before class. She started crying and asked them how they expected her to teach. They responded that not to do so would be unprofessoinal. Odd coming from a person who picked a horrible time and place to give her the bad news.

How did the girl die?

[HLJHLJ]

Not on the same scale at all, but in a previous, non-esl, job I was at an off-site placement when I got the phone call to say I needed to call into the main office on my way home because I was being made redundant. Luckily there was another teacher there who was really understanding, because I struggled to keep my mind on the job that afternoon.

And a few years ago my sister was late for university because she got run over outside the college. She was thrown across the road by the car, and although she managed to get up and walk into class, she was very bruised / battered and still in shock. Her lecturer was completely unsympathetic, and just annoyed that she was a little late, he made her stay for the class. So it was a couple of hours before she was able to see a Doctor. Maybe he just didn't grasp what had actually happened, but I thought it was pretty heartless. She should have ignored him and left, but she was too shaken up to argue back.

[Glenski]

I was teaching a conversation school class of half a dozen senior citizens when one of the men keeled over into someone's lap. Had to get a nurse from an office nearby to resuscitate him. Turned out he had extremely low blood pressure. They took him to a hospital, but I had to continue the class (staff's directive) as if nothing had happened!

Next week the gentleman returned, gave me a big box as a gift to say he was sorry he had interrupted the class, explained his medical condition to the other students, and left the class for good.

I've also had to teach a class or two in high school where one of their classmates had committed suicide or died on the athletic field that week. Made for an interesting roll call when some kids were absent to attend the funerals.

[naturegirl321]

I've done that. I've passed out in front of the class with only two minutes left only to wake up and find my students raising my legs trying to get blood to my head. NOt fun. Especially in the first week of school. Then I had to deal with everyone thinking I was pregnant . . .Low blood pressure isn't at that it's cracked up to be. I don't know how many times I've looked drunk becuase of it.

We actually had a kid hang himself about 20 feet from our office, in the stairwell.. Suicide is all too common in Asia.

[artemisia]

Some sad stories.

No, my experiences have not been so immediate. I've seen happen with other teachers (sudden news for a student in the class about a death in the family). Probably my most difficult experience was in a high school class full of tricky kids I'd been strong-armed into taking. I found out one particularly wild and intractable boy lived with his father. His mother had already died and his father had just been diagnosed with terminal cancer. I was glad to have been given the heads up as I soft pedalled around him while trying not to make it obvious I was doing that. Despite showing a marked tendency towards violent behaviour (he seemed to be on a fast-track to a police record and worse) this boy ended up gaining 'merit' in the final exam. To be honest, I was amazed. Who knows where is he now.

[mozzar]

A co-worker was teaching a one-to-one with a student whose boyfriend was in the final weeks of his life. Apparently she would break down crying.

[steviok85]

I've no idea, NatureGirl, how this girl died. I just asked my student if she was ok and chose not to pry any further.

[Teacher in Rome]

I once called a student at home because she was late for her lesson. She told me that her (Downs) baby had died that weekend. She seemed very calm and matter-of-fact about it, saying that she was glad her baby was with Jesus. I was in pieces the rest of the day.

[Songbird]

A couple of years back I was in my 2nd week of term in China, when one of my students was not in class. Asked where she was and there was an uneasy silence, until someone just quickly made the excuse 'she's gone home' to get the class rolling.

A bunch came up to me after class telling me her body had been found the day before by the local river. The next week in class was pretty hard to deal with. I spoke about the importance of talking to someone if things weren't going so well and if anyone needed to talk I gave them time to talk to me. It was tough. I blamed myself for awhile, as being a foreigner, I should have seen the signs that something was wrong.

That same week we also had a boy who threw himself off the 4th floor of the dormitory.

[coledavis]

Bathos rather than pathos here.

"Cole, I really need to speak to you. I don't know another teacher I can tell."

"Yes, Ahmed, what is it?" (Oh dear, what's coming?)

"It's Manchester United. They beat Portsmouth."