Job Discussion Forums

[hewlett77]

Currently I�m in Zhongshan China and just quit my job due to the isolation and emotional issues which have been plaqing my life for a long time. It�s not an option I go back to New Zealand as my parents and family refuse to talk to me or see me due to something that happens many years before. Something along the lines of child abuse, which my family would rather ignore and I fend for myself out in the big world. I�m good at doing my job, but lately the last year it�s been a real personal battle for me. In my work, I do well, teaching, and being creative, always on time, and keeping the kids lively and happy.
My current agent from Guangzhou, a nice woman, made a killing from me charging the school 4,500rmb and I had to pay her 2,000rmb for the introduction to the school. Does not give me any more confidence in these so called recruiters.
I�m terrible with money management, but I seem to survive up to this point in my life. Some people might judge me as a loser, but hey I never gave up. When I�m down I get up and keep on trying. So as of right now I�m sitting in a caf�, eating healthy food working out my next step. I�m on a business visa which expires in October this year, but I need to go to Hong Kong or Macau every 2 months. I�m divorced, no kids, so lucky I guess but like to settle but so hard. I�ve been to many cities in china such as Harbin, Dalian, Chongqing, Nantong, Guangzhou, Shenzhen and now Zhongshan.
Last weekend I hit a big low in my experience in china. I thought I met the perfect woman in Guangzhou only to find out later one I got back to Zhongshan she was married. A real shocker. Her husband was helping her find foreigners to play with online. That really knocked me around finding out the news. I guess my life become so colorful, but me really I just want to settle in one place and have my own family.
I guess that�s it for me.

[flyingscotsman]

SO what is it you want exactly?

[mat chen]

Hewlet 777. As a long time reident of Asia I understand your grief. All I can say is that living here provides you with radical ups and downs. Life back home can saddle you with years of bad luck and good luck. Here things change quickly. One thing you may look into is meditation. I saw on TED.Com, that many psychs who claim it greatly enhances happiness. It helps me see things more clearly. Soounds like your job is standard for here. You'll find another quickly. Working on a business visa is now the norm in China. It is a way of getting around having to give gifts to people who know nothing about a qualified teacher abilities.

[daCabbie]

Have you thought about a new country? Maybe South America or Africa?

I feel for you. I think we all have good weeks and bad weeks. It has been clinically proven that talking to a neighbor for twenty minutes a day is as affective as taking Prozac. I think its those simple normal interactions most of us crave.

No one here called you a loser and don't do that to yourself.

Just remember:

It always works out.
It has always worked out fine in the past.
And it will always work out fine in the future.
It might not be what you want, but its enough.

When I feel down, my best friend throws me hundred and says, 'go get yourself some.'

[TexasHighway]

[mat chen]

This ploy is common in South Korea. Husband acts as a pimp. You are lucky. In Korea the police get involved and the whole affair can be quite expensive.

[xjgirl]

So Hewlett...

Have you relocated to Xiamen yet?
As other posters pointed out, it's not an ideal place. I can understand the attraction of it being close to HK to renew your f, but it's not actually THAT close to HK.
Since you're in guangdong, why don't you try peizheng college, they're looking for people ASAP according to the jobs board.

Your first priority should be finding a school to immediately sponser you for a z-visa, be careful a school bluffs you into accepting a job, and then asks you to work on a f-visa as they can't be bothered to get the foreign affairs dept to issue an invitation letter. first acquire an invitation letter then move to the school.

[7969]

[bradley]

Why not try Shenzhen?

Or go to Thailand?

[knight4ever]

I agree with Bradley. Go to Shenzhen. Shenzhen is a great place to work and live. Plenty of teaching jobs here. Schools are always hiring and looking for good FTs.

[Roundtrip]

I'm so sorry you have had to endure being victimized in your homeland and now in a foreign country. Know that in the eyes of God, you are perfect and beautiful. I parrot what some of the others are saying. You may be happier in Africa or Europe. It sounds like you need a complete change of culture and some fresh air. I agree with the suggestion to meditate, but first, I'd say get the hell out of your present situation. You deserve so much better.

[blitzkrig]

I think you need to find a group of westerners to hangout with.
Get out of Zhongshan and work for a school with lots of western colleagues.


About your family.
Look. You need to change your present situation if you're going to do something with the child-abuse issues. I suspect that those bad memories have gotten worse because of your present situation.
Have you tried shooting of a mail to your family explaining exactly what's happening to you? I suggest you do it even if it seems impossible to you now.

I've been in a similar situation myself and it eventually sorted out.
If your issues are getting really bad, try looking up a western psychologist at an international hospital in shenzhen or gz.

[hewlett77]

I'm in Beijing now. There is no way to contact home. My embassy even cannot find them. Anyhow I have an ok job here, but the current agent who convinced me to come here, well she is dishonest as hell. She will be the last agent I will touch in china. No more. So stay away from china esl. So on my own here; owe so much money, just to set up house here. Not a good start. But somehow I will survive and be ok.

[xjgirl]

what a victim mentality u have