Job Discussion Forums

Will. · Joined: 02 May 2003 Posts: 783 Location: London Uk

Sorry,
When I hear "She's my girlfriend" I do not hear anything different for male or female.
Those female people you refer to who wander around Saying "Hey girlfriend!" should recognise this little fact and avoid confusing the rest of us. Explain to your students that they too could get into hot water if they use it.
On the positive side, continued use might stop the men using it and then there would need to be a new appelation for the 'lady', 'partner', 'close friend' in our lives.
Myself, I describe a male of close platonic friendship as a mate. It would be interesting to hear what other posters think about about the male necessity of finding a name for a close male friend other than those we already use.

denise · Joined: 23 Apr 2003 Posts: 3419 Location: finally home-ish

A few years back, one of my students in Prague opined that the world's overpopulation problem would be solved by impotence.

Regarding the male/female friend label situation--I'm fallen into the habit of labelling anyone, male or female, platonic or otherwise (just for the boys!), as "friend." No other label satisfies me--too many weird connotations.

d

guest of Japan · Joined: 28 Feb 2003 Posts: 1601 Location: Japan

When I first began teaching in Japan I taught a Japanese Self-Defense Force colonel in a discussion class. The topic was standards and testing in education.

He opined, "If students cannot or do now meet the standards they should be eliminated." Shocked

leby26 · Joined: 30 Jan 2004 Posts: 68

I've always found it interesting that male homosexuality, at least in my observation, seems to be such a touchy subject - with males, as you say 'getting into hot water' for slipping up on the 'boyfriend/man friend', etc thing - but girls can say 'girlfriend' without flinching and female pop tarts can perform faux lesbian kisses on television simply because it can appeal to some male fantasy.....interesting that such issues come out in your classes Laughing

khmerhit · Posted: Sun May 16, 2004 2:22 pm Post subject:

Im like O my GAWD -- dont you go there girlfriend!!

Ben Round de Bloc · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Posts: 1946

arioch36 · Joined: 21 Jan 2003 Posts: 3589

One of the few things that drives me crazy in China, meeting someone who instantly wants to be your good friend. Do they have a different idea of friendship? To me, friends are a result of a long process.

Sure male and female friendships are different. Why shouldn't they be? But where I lived in America, a girl did not call another girl her "girlfriend" unless....I wonder what age and location Eijse is from?

Here in CHina young men will hold their classmates, and girls walk arm in arm or closer with female friends. I think it is great. But the boys will not call their male friend a "boyfriend". Why does it have to be a male problem with homosexuality? Girls in China also do not call each other girlfriend.

schely10 · Joined: 05 Apr 2004 Posts: 38 Location: Guadalajara, Mx

In the US, we would not call a male friend a mate for the same reason explained by Ben. If you were describing someone as a male friend of yours, you'd say any one of the following:
"my boy"
"my peeps"
"my man"
"my dawg"
"my homie"
"my home slice"
or just, "my friend"

James_T_Kirk · Joined: 20 Sep 2003 Posts: 357 Location: Ten Forward

denise · Joined: 23 Apr 2003 Posts: 3419 Location: finally home-ish

Alitas · Joined: 19 May 2003 Posts: 187 Location: Maine

I call my closest girl friends my girlfriends. I use it for reference. "I'm hanging out at my girlfriend's" or "with my girlfriends". Maybe because I am married no one thinks it's something different? Or maybe they DO? Oh, well.

Around these parts guy friends call each other "buddy". "I'm gonna hang with the buddies tonight" or what have you. "My good buddy, Mike" as in an introduction.

I have this habit of talking about my closest, best-est friend, "My best friend and I"...it was only after a few other ladies looked sad I stopped saying that. But it made me wonder...I've known you for 6 months, and I have known her 16 years? Ok.....I think women are sensitive to that?

The only way I knew my brother had a "best friend" was when he got married and then he picked a best man. Do guys ever think about it?

woodersn · Joined: 11 May 2004 Posts: 26 Location: Quepos, Costa Rica

rj · Joined: 29 Mar 2004 Posts: 159

I use "friend" for male and female relationships. If I don't know them well enough to consider them a friend, I simply describe how I know them (a friend of x's, a person from work, a person i met, the spouse of x, whatever). In college I spent time with a particular group of females and referred to them as "the girls" but never as "girlfriends."

Most guys I know refer to male friends as simply "friends." Sometimes they'll say "buddy" or "pal" but generally it is just "friend."

Eijse · Joined: 17 Dec 2003 Posts: 119 Location: Yemen (Aden)