Job Discussion Forums

[Bozo Yoroshiku]

[tokyo story]

[kdynamic]

[tokyo story]

In my experience, having an "older" Japanese girlfriend for four years and being friends with Japanese women in their thirties, they tend to be more open minded. They're naturally more mature than younger girls -- whether it's from disappointments in love or other such life experiences -- they've traveled and lived abroad and generally speak better English (which can't be discounted.) They all worry about their age, however. I don't know why they'd want to be young again, never knowing what they want... If they could know what they know now and have the looks of a 21 year-old I guess they'd be happy.

Many of them have been burnt by Japanese guys. Some of them are divorced. Others are tired of their Japanese partners' attitudes. A few buy into the myth that Western guys are kinder or more considerate. Japanese people are fed a lot of stereotypes. Even when they should know better, they often seek clarification.

There's a host of reasons why Japanese date foreigners -- sometimes it's natural, sometimes it's curiosity (like Japanese girls who are fascinated by differences -- chest hair, etc.) Still, a lasting relationship is a lasting relationship. I know a Japanese woman in her thirties married to an Australian guy in his twenties... I hope it works out.

[Bozo Yoroshiku]

[ndorfn]

havent read any of this thread, but for me it was the chance to learn japanese, have sex, and get involved in the country I lived in.

[markrendl]

My Japanese GF and I will most likely stay here in Japan after we eventually marry as I'm happy enough living and working here, her career is tied here and she'll be happier living closer to her aging parents. She's not adverse to living in the US though. Perhaps once her parents are dead and gone and we're ready to retire, we'll review that option.

Markrendl

[24601]

I honestly don't understand why any non-Japanese person male or female would remotely consider having a serious relationship (specifically, leading to having children) with a Japanese person considering a) the divorce rate and b) Japan's approval of kidnapping/barring access to the foreign parent in the case of divorce (and sometimes even without a divoce ). I really, seriously, do not understand. That is the one and reason why if I were single I would absolutely never get serious with anyone Japanese.

[tokyo story]

So don't have a relationship with a Japanese... but it's stupid to think that everyone's Japanese wife/girlfriend are potential child kidnappers or divorces waiting to happen... Japanese women are individuals you know.

[Mamasita516]

OP: you should've also included the options
I am a woman/man, have lived or am living in Japan, have not dated at least one Japanese person, but am/am not open to the possibility of a serious relationship with the majority of these people.

I just got here two weeks ago and have not dated anyone yet, but I would if I had the opportunity. Just for companionship and the cultural exchange it would offer me and hopefully to the other person.

[Seeker of truth]

I agree. It's a great cultural exchange. I had language lessons at my company during the week, and then dated Japanese women on the weekend who didn't speak English. After several months of this, my Japanese definately improved.

The problem was falling in love with one of the women. After several months of dating, the subject of marriage came up. However, she didn't want to leave Japan, and I didn't want to commit the rest of my life to living there. So, we decided to split, peacefully.

[Bozo Yoroshiku]

[Deicide]

are relationships with Japanese women as transient as Western relationships...do you invest a couple of years, break up, spend years recovering from the pain only to start the circus act again...the only constant in life is change, no where does apply more than in relationships...are Japanese relationships any different?

[TEAM_PAPUA]

I like the sailor suits