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| Stay, go, or pee in a chair? |
| Go to New Mexico now, together. |
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15% |
[ 3 ] |
| Stay in Korea, relax, you got more time to kill. |
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35% |
[ 7 ] |
| Go to New Mexico alone. You did your year, and she didn't return the favor by getting ready. Tough skittles. |
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50% |
[ 10 ] |
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| Total Votes : 20 |
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Zyzyfer
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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 Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 2:24 am Post subject: |
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Well, I guess I should update a bit on the situation, as I've done a lot of talking with her about it, and she finally started taking the mortality of my Korean experience and her own further future desires more seriously. Ironically, she doesn't want to raise a family in Korea, much to my surprise. I never knew this.
The current situation is that she's going to quit her current job(she's doing that no matter what), study a bit here, study a bit in Canada or near D.C.(she's got semi-close family there), and then we can meet up sometime in March, and see how this NM thing is gonna go. It'll mean that we're separated for two months, but the immense good that will stem from her spending that time in North America will far outweigh that. Moreover, she'll have a support group either way while she's there, and if NA life doesn't appeal to her, she can say so before I back my bags and head stateside.
There's still the major hump of NM to deal with, but I'm sure there's some way to work it out. |
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Tiger Beer
Joined: 07 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 2:56 am Post subject: |
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| Good plan zyzyfer.. when do you leave? I'm envious! |
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Zyzyfer
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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| Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 3:18 pm Post subject: |
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| I wouldn't dip until next March. Still got a hefty chunk of contract left. |
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Blue Flower
Joined: 23 Feb 2003
Location: The realisation that I only have to endure two more weeks in this filthy, perverted, nasty place!
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| Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 7:53 pm Post subject: |
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| Sounds like things are falling into place. I am really pleased that she is going out there to see some of the world. Good Luck! |
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eamo
Joined: 08 Mar 2003
Location: Shepherd's Bush, 1964.
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| Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 8:52 pm Post subject: |
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Glad to hear there's a plan. And it sounds like a good one.
I was thinking that you guys not having a plan for awhile was the worse thing about this. |
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Tiger Beer
Joined: 07 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 12:07 am Post subject: |
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| Next March.. I'm not as envious then.. you are doomed like me.. I have next April.. I was glad to come back to Korea.. but now I'll be glad to escape for awhile.. I probably just need a vacation or something. One-year contracts can be quite stifling.. |
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Corporal
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 12:40 am Post subject: |
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| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| It'll mean that we're separated for two months, but the immense good that will stem from her spending that time in North America will far outweigh that. . |
So will you be "seeing other people" in those two months you're apart? Because we all know how unrealistic it is to stay faithful to one person....right?  |
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Tiger Beer
Joined: 07 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 1:29 am Post subject: |
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| Corporal wrote: |
| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| It'll mean that we're separated for two months, but the immense good that will stem from her spending that time in North America will far outweigh that. . |
So will you be "seeing other people" in those two months you're apart? Because we all know how unrealistic it is to stay faithful to one person....right? |
Two months isn't long at all. When I was single in the States, a few months could go by while I was very single and very available and not have much of anything come along. I don't think it would be difficult to remain faithful for two months. Particularly if they are committed and planning to be with each other several months later.
Plus its a good plan to have her adjust on her own at the beginning so there isn't any kind of 'blame game' or 'i'm doing this for you' kind of anything or whatever else.. adjustment period.. plus zyzyer needs to get his stuff happening and not deal with both at the same time right off the start. You need to devote all of your attention to the job to start with, and a few months later once its settled, you can devote time to the girl who will require alot of attention due to the cirumstances.. |
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Zyzyfer
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 3:16 am Post subject: |
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| Corporal wrote: |
| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| It'll mean that we're separated for two months, but the immense good that will stem from her spending that time in North America will far outweigh that. . |
So will you be "seeing other people" in those two months you're apart? Because we all know how unrealistic it is to stay faithful to one person....right? |
We've already been apart for two months before. And, while gang ah jee, eamo, denz, and Bobster are all sexy in a thong, I don't think I'll be doing anything with anyone other than literally "seeing" them. |
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uber1024
Joined: 28 Jul 2003
Location: New York City
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 4:41 am Post subject: |
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| Tiger Beer wrote: |
| Corporal wrote: |
| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| It'll mean that we're separated for two months, but the immense good that will stem from her spending that time in North America will far outweigh that. . |
So will you be "seeing other people" in those two months you're apart? Because we all know how unrealistic it is to stay faithful to one person....right? |
Two months isn't long at all. When I was single in the States, a few months could go by while I was very single and very available and not have much of anything come along. I don't think it would be difficult to remain faithful for two months. Particularly if they are committed and planning to be with each other several months later. |
I'll agree that two months is not the end of the world. I just went three months without seeing my g/f while she was away for the summer and we just saw each other for the first time on Thursday. It was rough, but getting better. It can be tough and there's always an adjustment period when you see each other, but think of it as a chance to have a first date again. Try to frame it in a positive light. |
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eamo
Joined: 08 Mar 2003
Location: Shepherd's Bush, 1964.
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 9:19 am Post subject: |
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| Noodle wrote: |
| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| And, while gang ah jee, eamo, denz, and Bobster are all sexy in a thong, I don't think I'll be doing anything with anyone other than literally "seeing" them. |
Please, please, please......if there are pictures of them in that, especially group pictures, NEVER post them!!!!!!!!  The Guess-Whose-Butt thread was bad enough~
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I resent that!! 
My butt has become very presentable since the enormo-bruise went down.
Denz and Gang ah jee have very skinny butts so i don't wanna see pictures of them either.
Now Bobster........... He might surprise you with his posterier..... |
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Blue Flower
Joined: 23 Feb 2003
Location: The realisation that I only have to endure two more weeks in this filthy, perverted, nasty place!
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 8:04 pm Post subject: |
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| Zyzyfer wrote: |
| And, while gang ah jee, eamo, denz, and Bobster are all sexy in a thong, I don't think I'll be doing anything with anyone other than literally "seeing" them. |
I think we need proof of this. Next gathering, I expect you brothers to show up in your stringy best. I saw a red elephant thong the other day - who wants that one? more to the point - who thinks they can adequately wear it? |
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Hotel Cheonan
Joined: 08 Apr 2003
Location: Gwangju
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| Posted: Wed Sep 03, 2003 7:56 pm Post subject: |
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| thanks Zyzyfer for the interesting tangent this thread has taken. More importantly glad that you worked things out. |
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rapier
Joined: 16 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2003 4:22 am Post subject: |
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for what its worth, my advice:!
You will have some regrets whatever you do, and you probably won't be sure until the crucial moment.
But: once you've explored your potential, done what you wanted to do to develop as an individual, you'll be in a better position to love someone else. Love yourself, your hopes and dreams, of what you want to be and do. don't sacrifice them to anyone else.
I guess what i'm saying is go to New mexico. Be all that you can be!!!
If she truly loves you and vice versa, you'll both wait until eachother is ready... |
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