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| Do you wanna have kids? |
| I'm male and I want kids. |
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26% |
[ 30 ] |
| I'm female and I want kids. |
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13% |
[ 15 ] |
| I'm male and I don't know if I want kids. |
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15% |
[ 17 ] |
| I'm female and I don't know if I want kids. |
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8% |
[ 10 ] |
| I'm male and I don't want kids. |
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22% |
[ 25 ] |
| I'm female and I don't want kids |
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13% |
[ 15 ] |
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| Total Votes : 112 |
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Young FRANKenstein
Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Location: Castle Frankenstein (that's FRONKensteen)
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 Posted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 11:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Big_Bird wrote: |
| I used to envy people who knew for sure if they wanted them or not. |
If you know you want them, society rolls out the welcome mat (Congratualtions! You're one of us! A REAL person!)
If you're not sure, it's always "Well, you'll come around one day, THEN you'll be one of us."
But if you know you don't want them, man... I may as well be shipped to a leper colony. I've had total strangers SCREAM at me about how selfish I am (knowing nothing about my family history or even WHY I choose not to have them).
And doctors are the worst. I was so sure about not having kids, I wanted to have my vasectomy when I was 27. Not ONE doctor would do it. They actually REFUSED because I was "too young" for such a decision. Meanwhile, you have 12 year-olds free to choose to bring their crack babies to full-term and that's okay, I guess. It took coming to Korea to find a doctor who would do the big V...
(sorry if that sounded like a rant... it kinda was... this topic still touches some buttons)
| ChimpumCallao wrote: |
| Im so happy I get to be DINKS for much much longer. |
I'm not a DINK. I refuse to be a DINK. I'm a THINKER (Two Healthy Incomes, No Kids, Early Retirement) |
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Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
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| Posted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 2:13 am Post subject: |
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| Young FRANKenstein wrote: |
But if you know you don't want them, man... I may as well be shipped to a leper colony. I've had total strangers SCREAM at me about how selfish I am (knowing nothing about my family history or even WHY I choose not to have them). |
I wonder if that's different based on gender, because very few people believe I don't want kids. Apparently I'll "meet the right man who will want kids and [I]'ll want him to father [my] children." The children I don't want? Give me a break. What is my uterus? Some wish-fulfillment service center?
The only people who really, finally believe I don't want them are my mother, stepfather, dad, and brother. Everyone else is convinced that I'll change my mind.
And this isn't new. I've been saying since I was 16 that I don't want kids. I've had many a first or second or third date ruined when the guy brings up kids. Jeez, since when are MEN bringing up babies so early in dating? |
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Young FRANKenstein
Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Location: Castle Frankenstein (that's FRONKensteen)
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| Posted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 3:18 am Post subject: |
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| Atavistic wrote: |
| I've had many a first or second or third date ruined when the guy brings up kids. Jeez, since when are MEN bringing up babies so early in dating? |
I dated a woman once, and as I tell any woman who has the potential to be a mainstay in my life, I do NOT want children. I tell them right out of the gate it's a deal breaker, so there's no surprises. It was going well, coffe here, dinner there, maybe a movie. Beautiful, smart, good job, didn't seem like the usual freaks I get set up with. For two months this went on. Then one night we made plans to go for a nice dinner at a posh restaurant, and what does she do? She brings her DAUGHTER to dinner with us?  Yes, that's right, she lied to me for *2* months about being a mother. I asked her why she wasted my time for the last 2 months, knowing my feelings about parenthood. Her answer? "Well, I didn't think you were really serious about that. Everyone likes my baby! And if I got you to fall in love with me, you would stay with me anyway. (giggle)"  Man, I was livid. I stood up and ripped her a new one right before I walked out of the restaurant.
Even if someone was braindead enough to "change their mind" after such a stupid stunt, how could they get over the trust issues after being lied to for the entire relationship? |
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PimpofKorea
Joined: 09 Dec 2006
Location: Dealing in high quality imported English
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| Posted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 5:50 am Post subject: |
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| Yeah...but you gotta admit....single women with kids are much easier to get in the sack....it would never be my first option...but when the chips are down...its late at night.....she'll be there waiting for you..as soon as she puts the little one to bed. |
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thebum
Joined: 09 Jan 2005
Location: North Korea
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| Posted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 6:05 am Post subject: |
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| Atavistic wrote: |
| Young FRANKenstein wrote: |
But if you know you don't want them, man... I may as well be shipped to a leper colony. I've had total strangers SCREAM at me about how selfish I am (knowing nothing about my family history or even WHY I choose not to have them). |
I wonder if that's different based on gender, because very few people believe I don't want kids. Apparently I'll "meet the right man who will want kids and [I]'ll want him to father [my] children." The children I don't want? Give me a break. What is my uterus? Some wish-fulfillment service center?
The only people who really, finally believe I don't want them are my mother, stepfather, dad, and brother. Everyone else is convinced that I'll change my mind.
And this isn't new. I've been saying since I was 16 that I don't want kids. I've had many a first or second or third date ruined when the guy brings up kids. Jeez, since when are MEN bringing up babies so early in dating? |
i believe you. |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 2:40 am Post subject: |
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| I am one of those "not so sure people". I have NEVER heard my biological clock ticking and I think that is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard of. A biological clock??? Geez, women can have babies as late as 50, if that is what they want. Sure, there is an increased risk for Down's Syndrome, but I'd rather wait than have a baby before I am ready...emotionally, financially, and married. Teaching kids is fun and great, but at the end of the day, they can go bug their mommy. I just don't want to be like some of these nutty korean Moms who give up EVERYTHING for their kids. They have no life. They only spend all their money to send their kids to this hagwon and that hagwon. They let themselves go and develop the ajumma look and attitude. Many of them age so much by 35. They are like "stage Moms". Crazy! When I get married, I want to focus time on bettering myself and always looking good for my husband, and cooking wonderful meals for my husband. I want to stay small and petite until the day I die. I don't see how a baby fits into this picture, unless I have lots of outside help with the baby. I hate the smells of babies too. it makes me sick. Vomit, spit-up, smelly diapers. I'd be vomiting if I had to smell that all day. I can't imagine walking around smelling like a combo of baby poop and baby powder, etc, with breasts that are oozing sour smelling milk. Yuck! Then, your husband may cheat on you 'cause you won't be looking your best. |
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numazawa
Joined: 20 Mar 2005
Location: The Concrete Barnyard
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 3:03 am Post subject: |
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| princess wrote: |
| I am one of those "not so sure people". |
Alas, I knew it would come to this: you've finally internalized the rumors.
For what it's worth, though, I want to tell you that I, for one, have never concluded definitely that you're not a real person. I mean that sincerely. |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 3:04 am Post subject: |
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| numazawa wrote: |
| princess wrote: |
| I am one of those "not so sure people". |
Alas, I knew it would come to this: you've finally internalized the rumors.
For what it's worth, though, I want to tell you that I, for one, have never concluded definitely that you're not a real person. I mean that sincerely. |
Thank you^^ |
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Cheonmunka
Joined: 04 Jun 2004
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 1:07 pm Post subject: |
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For those who don't have children, please don't complain and snarl at parents in restaurants etc about controlling their kids. It's very hard to control little children. Children get bored as soon as the parents start to eat. Just after making sure the children have eaten, and themselves just starting to unwind, the children start to go wandering, mess with each other, and want to play.
Even when eating, parents are at a wits end with busyness.
When I'm in a restaurant and when the children are particularly noisy I sometimes get those 'evil looks' from other people. At the samer time I acknowledge that problem but nothing I have done to prepare for the day out works at the time. Parents aren't magic beings who can wave their wands to affect their children. |
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Wrench
Joined: 07 Apr 2005
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 4:17 pm Post subject: |
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| Cheonmunka wrote: |
For those who don't have children, please don't complain and snarl at parents in restaurants etc about controlling their kids. It's very hard to control little children. Children get bored as soon as the parents start to eat. Just after making sure the children have eaten, and themselves just starting to unwind, the children start to go wandering, mess with each other, and want to play.
Even when eating, parents are at a wits end with busyness.
When I'm in a restaurant and when the children are particularly noisy I sometimes get those 'evil looks' from other people. At the samer time I acknowledge that problem but nothing I have done to prepare for the day out works at the time. Parents aren't magic beings who can wave their wands to affect their children. |
Then don't bring your brat to the restaurant or take them to a "Child" friendly place.
PS. Male and I rather be a eunuch then a dad. |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 11:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Wrench wrote: |
| Cheonmunka wrote: |
For those who don't have children, please don't complain and snarl at parents in restaurants etc about controlling their kids. It's very hard to control little children. Children get bored as soon as the parents start to eat. Just after making sure the children have eaten, and themselves just starting to unwind, the children start to go wandering, mess with each other, and want to play.
Even when eating, parents are at a wits end with busyness.
When I'm in a restaurant and when the children are particularly noisy I sometimes get those 'evil looks' from other people. At the samer time I acknowledge that problem but nothing I have done to prepare for the day out works at the time. Parents aren't magic beings who can wave their wands to affect their children. |
Then don't bring your brat to the restaurant or take them to a "Child" friendly place.
PS. Male and I rather be a eunuch then a dad. |
Yeah, I hate it when people let their kids bug me in restaurants. If you can't conrol your kids, leave them home or stay home with them if you can't get a sitter. If you have kids folks, they are yours to raise, not mine. I have alwyas heard that if you don't make your kids behave, someone else will, like 20 years down the road when they are sitting in prison. |
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Manner of Speaking
Joined: 09 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 1:53 am Post subject: |
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| Well, I think Cheonmuka has a point. There has to be a balance struck between the rights/space of people who don't want to have kids, and people who are raising them. After teaching kids, I have a better appreciation for what it takes to manage them. And in most cases it's not too difficult to find a quiet section in a restaurant, or a restaurant that is not a regular for parents and kids. Live and let live, as they say. |
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Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
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| Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 1:58 am Post subject: |
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| Cheonmunka wrote: |
| For those who don't have children, please don't complain and snarl at parents in restaurants etc about controlling their kids. It's very hard to control little children. Children get bored as soon as the parents start to eat. |
It's called a babysitter. Get one. |
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the_beaver
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 2:04 am Post subject: |
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| Wrench wrote: |
| Then don't bring your brat to the restaurant or take them to a "Child" friendly place. |
No fucking kidding.
You can ruin your night by staying home with the kids or you can ruin an entire restaurant's worth of patrons' nights. |
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Corporal
Joined: 25 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 3:38 am Post subject: |
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| the_beaver wrote: |
| Wrench wrote: |
| Then don't bring your brat to the restaurant or take them to a "Child" friendly place. |
No *beep* kidding.
You can ruin your night by staying home with the kids or you can ruin an entire restaurant's worth of patrons' nights. |
Oh, shut up. Like we give a toss if our noisy kids are disturbing the drunken cacklings of other patrons. |
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