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mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
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 Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 9:57 pm Post subject: Really, you can have the seat |
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Further to my pet theory that Koreans don't fully understand the physics of solid matter. There is a conventional agreement in Korea that solids behave more like a gas. The molecules that form the illusion of a solid ajumma before you can easily pass through the molecules that form the illusion of you.
Let me blueprint the situation I experienced the other day on the subway as I was vacating my seat:
The little circles are people. As you can see I'm trying to vacate my seat. There are two people sitting on either side of me, there are two molecule clouds we would recognize as salarymen standing. I have a narrow space to move forward, vacate my seat, get off the subway, and get to my Starbucks. Ajumma spots a vacating seat. She fails to grasp that under conventional models of physics, I need to first move forward, clear the two salarymen, and then she can step into the vacated bit of space-time and take her sacred, cherished seat.
I only make it as far as off my seat and forming the illusion that my molecule cloud is standing. The ajumma quickly plugs my only means of egress and makes it rather clear the seat IS hers. That's all well and good but now I have no method of egress. Mexican stand off. I look at her, waiting for her to figure it out: move those blocks around in your mind and realize there really is no way for you to pass through me and get the seat. It's her move. And the move any person who graduated kindergarten would make is taking a small step back. But no.
I literally had to wedge my way through her and the standing salaryman to my left.
Good times, man. |
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thebomb
Joined: 13 Nov 2006
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:10 pm Post subject: |
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| I know, they are not the sharpest tools in the box!! One thought process only, any more and their perms will straighten. |
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gsxr750r
Joined: 29 Jan 2007
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:15 pm Post subject: |
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The lady told me to be careful of ajumma who swing their purse into the empty seat as they are running, in order to get it before you. I happened to see an ajumma with a purse dashing for a seat I was about to plant my butt in (after standing nearly 45 minutes on the Green Line). I blocked her purse and took the seat. She had just entered the subway, and had run straight to the seat.
If she could move that fast, I wasn't the least bit sad about making her stand. |
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jinju
Joined: 22 Jan 2006
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:16 pm Post subject: |
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Go forward. knock ajumma on her ass if you need to, or AT THE VERY LEASTESTEST plant your shoulder (or hip if she's short and/or you are tall). If Im getting off the subway and people block me because they cant wait to get in, I do not, under any circumstances (and their age is such a circumstance) change my direction or avoid contact. Salarymen, ajossis, ajummas and halmonis have been bumped by me. Its their own damn fault for being stoooopid.
Last edited by jinju on Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:16 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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esetters21
Joined: 30 Apr 2006
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Hahaha! That's hilarious! The old perverbial Mexican standoff. That is so classic. Thanks for the laugh! |
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freethought
Joined: 13 Mar 2005
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:17 pm Post subject: |
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| One of the best posts I have ever read on this site. |
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Qinella
Joined: 25 Feb 2005
Location: the crib
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:21 pm Post subject: |
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When people do that to me I just shove into them and tell them 비켜줘! I perform this manoeuvre most often when exiting an elevator and the ajummas are trying to steamroll past me to get on before I can exit. They get they get the powershove and the rude comment combo.  |
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ajgeddes
Joined: 28 Apr 2004
Location: Yongsan
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:23 pm Post subject: |
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| jinju wrote: |
| Go forward. knock ajumma on her ass if you need to, or AT THE VERY LEASTESTEST plant your shoulder (or hip if she's short and/or you are tall). If Im getting off the subway and people block me because they cant wait to get in, I do not, under any circumstances (and their age is such a circumstance) change my direction or avoid contact. Salarymen, ajossis, ajummas and halmonis have been bumped by me. Its their own damn fault for being stoooopid. |
Same same here. I used to feel bad about doing this, but not anymore. I walk on my path and if people are in the way, I run them over. Especially when getting off the train, I feel sorry for people if they try to get on before I am off because they are going to get hit. |
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Doogie
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Hwaseong City
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:24 pm Post subject: |
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 Hilarious! Man, if I had a dollar for everytime this has happened to me. By the way, great diagram. Almost as good as watching John Madden describe a play on Monday night football. |
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jinju
Joined: 22 Jan 2006
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:25 pm Post subject: |
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| Qinella wrote: |
| When people do that to me I just shove into them and tell them 비켜줘! I perform this manoeuvre most often when exiting an elevator and the ajummas are trying to steamroll past me to get on before I can exit. They get they get the powershove and the rude comment combo. |
Although I highly disagree with your treatment of your parents here on daves, I congratulate you on dealing with idiots the only way they will understand. Ever imagine one of these people is your parent and really give a bit extra? |
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nautilus
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:26 pm Post subject: |
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My latest game is to guess who will leave their seat first.  I'm getting surprisingly good at predicting it. |
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rothkowitz
Joined: 27 Apr 2006
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:28 pm Post subject: |
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| jinju wrote: |
| Qinella wrote: |
| When people do that to me I just shove into them and tell them 비켜줘! I perform this manoeuvre most often when exiting an elevator and the ajummas are trying to steamroll past me to get on before I can exit. They get they get the powershove and the rude comment combo. |
Although I highly disagree with your treatment of your parents here on daves, I congratulate you on dealing with idiots the only way they will understand. Ever imagine one of these people is your parent and really give a bit extra? |
??
If my parents behaved like stereotypical Koreans I'd shun them. |
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freethought
Joined: 13 Mar 2005
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:32 pm Post subject: |
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Query...
비켜줘 does this come out as Ya, Sagagi upsa!
If not, what does it mean?
I have a friend who gets going on a roll and the other day he bashed into a kid and sent the kid spinning (literally). the kid started to turn around in anger then saw my friend, who is a big guy, and just smiled. |
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Dev
Joined: 18 Apr 2006
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:34 pm Post subject: |
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| ajgeddes wrote: |
| jinju wrote: |
| Go forward. knock ajumma on her ass if you need to, or AT THE VERY LEASTESTEST plant your shoulder (or hip if she's short and/or you are tall). If Im getting off the subway and people block me because they cant wait to get in, I do not, under any circumstances (and their age is such a circumstance) change my direction or avoid contact. Salarymen, ajossis, ajummas and halmonis have been bumped by me. Its their own damn fault for being stoooopid. |
Same same here. I used to feel bad about doing this, but not anymore. I walk on my path and if people are in the way, I run them over. Especially when getting off the train, I feel sorry for people if they try to get on before I am off because they are going to get hit. |
I hate it when fools wanting to board the trains stand right in front and center of the doors when people want to get off of the train. All part of the "me first" mentality that some Koreans exhibit. No manners. |
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Scouse Mouse
Joined: 07 Jan 2007
Location: Cloud #9
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| Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:46 pm Post subject: |
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In this situation I would just sit back down and flash her a killer grin... the subway is so good here it doesn't take much to switch lines and go back on yourself (I have gone the wrong way a few times and it's no big deal). Next time you stand up she may not bother to try for the seat and if she does have some more fun  |
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