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My first mini-break up in Korea
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Feloria



Joined: 02 Sep 2006

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 6:47 am    Post subject: My first mini-break up in Korea Reply with quote

I was sort of dating a Korean guy for the last couple of months, and it just ended officially a few days ago. I never thought I would feel this bad about it; but I do. I mean, I've had longer much more intense relationships end and it didn't suck this bad. Maybe it's because he was a lot of fun to be with, and it was kind of exciting being with him (he's a pro athlete). Plus he was always telling me how beautiful I am, and talking about the future as if we'd be together for a long time. Or maybe I'm bummed out because my close friends are in the States, and I feel like all I really have here now is my sh-t hogwan job. God, this is poop!
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princess



Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 6:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know exactly how you feel. I feel your pain 'cause I am feeling pain over a Korean guy too. At least your birthday isn't soon. Is it?
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butlerian



Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Because he was an "athlete guy"? Are so many girls really this shallow?
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Feloria



Joined: 02 Sep 2006

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

No, my birthday isn't until May. I can't believe I'm even writing about this on 'Daves'. I guess in a way, it's my own fault. I was 'warned' about this guy and his reputation with the ladies-he has quite a few female admirers. He is very charming, and I believed things he said to me and promises he made. I just thank God I didn't sleep with him, not that I wasn't tempted!
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butlerian



Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Feloria wrote:
No, my birthday isn't until May. I can't believe I'm even writing about this on 'Daves'. I guess in a way, it's my own fault. I was 'warned' about this guy and his reputation with the ladies-he has quite a few female admirers. He is very charming, and I believed things he said to me and promises he made. I just thank God I didn't sleep with him, not that I wasn't tempted!


His "reputation" should have made it clear to you that he was what many girls would consider to be temporary pleasure rather than long-term material.
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Feloria



Joined: 02 Sep 2006

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, as far as being "shallow" I don't know- I will admit, that part of it did add something. But I can honestly say that I would have really liked him anyway, regardless of what he did for a living. I asked myself a couple of times if I was being shallow- and I completely understand you posing that question. What can I say? I'm human.
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oneofthesarahs



Joined: 05 Nov 2006
Location: Sacheon City

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey, I feel your pain. It happens to the best of us. I think all of us have ignored common sense in the rush of excitement of a new relationship at one point or another. Chin up. Now you're single and ready to mingle.
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mlomker



Joined: 21 Mar 2007

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Feloria wrote:
Well, as far as being "shallow" I don't know


When I read your post I wasn't sure if you mentioned the athlete part because he was very fit or if it was a celebrity thing. I can understand the appeal in either case--celebrities can introduce you to other interesting people and everyone wants to date a hunk, right?
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Flash Ipanema



Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 7:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

from http://www.eslcafe.com/forums/korea/viewtopic.php?t=79922&highlight=:

europe2seoul wrote:
Are you long-legged slim girl in her 20s with cute face and good personality, single & no ties or bad breakups you need to recover from - I'll help you.

Otherwise, maybe someone else can help..... Laughing


Are so many men really this shallow? Why are you knocking her when she's down? You're basically saying it's her fault for getting hurt because she should have know the guy was a player. Why not blame the guy for playing her if that's what happened?
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gsxr750r



Joined: 29 Jan 2007

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 8:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Let me help you....

Korean guys are always telling their girls that they want to be together forever, marry, blah, etc.. It's sort of expected, actually. I know, because Korean girls get freaked out by foreigners because we don't oogle all over them and talk marriage within a short period of time.

Culturally, there are a lot of different factors in play. Some find it romantic, others find it annoying to downright suffocating.

He misses you, but probably finds himself wishing he'd had sex with you. When he "misses" you, that is what he's actually got going on in his head. It's not love.

You were like Baskin Robbins that he was able to look at and smell, but never taste. Now he's hungry, and he can't even look.

It's nothing to feel sad or guilty about. Two seconds after he gets off of the phone from crying to you, he's on it again to one of his other chicks. Trust me.

You were wise to get out when you did.


Last edited by gsxr750r on Sun Mar 25, 2007 8:26 am; edited 1 time in total
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friendofIgnatius J.



Joined: 20 Aug 2006

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 8:26 am    Post subject: yeah.... Reply with quote

I think it is utterly silly to castigate the OP for being shallow. How many stupid posts are there on how to get/trick a hot Korean girl into dating us? Or the plethora of posts about how hot Korean girls are.

"Why do you see the sliver in your brother�s (sister's in this case) eye, but fail to see the rafter of wood in your own?"

The pathos of the OP was that of sadness and I think it is truly shallow to focus on a detail and not the spirit.
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SuperFly



Joined: 09 Jul 2003
Location: In the doghouse

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 11:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Feloria,

Feel better, there are A LOT of fish in the ocean of Seoul!
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butlerian



Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 3:47 pm    Post subject: Re: yeah.... Reply with quote

friendofIgnatius J. wrote:
I think it is utterly silly to castigate the OP for being shallow. How many stupid posts are there on how to get/trick a hot Korean girl into dating us? Or the plethora of posts about how hot Korean girls are.

"Why do you see the sliver in your brother�s (sister's in this case) eye, but fail to see the rafter of wood in your own?"

The pathos of the OP was that of sadness and I think it is truly shallow to focus on a detail and not the spirit.


True, I wasn't intending to attack the OP, as I'm sure she is feeling under the weather. It just seemed a bit strange that it appeared that the main reason she was upset was because he was an athlete. Still, either way, I'm not in a position to judge, and I wish the OP the best of luck in the future.
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sportsguy35



Joined: 27 Apr 2005

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 4:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What's his name? I probaly know him. I teach a lot of KBL and K-League soccer players English.
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Feloria



Joined: 02 Sep 2006

PostPosted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 4:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sportsguy- he plays a different sport.
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